I think no one would expect this of Nathan at first, but the answer hit me with sudden clarity:
Preservation.
At the core of everything he does - traveling, making music, trying to spread joy, giving others a place and excuse to express themselves, and now possibly building a true future - is a young man who, in one night, lost everyone he cherished most in the world and the one voice who gave him direction. That voice he keeps inside urges him not to grieve, but to bring to others a touch of that sublime contentment that was his younger life, and thus best honor and preserve what might otherwise be completely lost.
He simply struggles to decide how he might best do so, torn between the Wanderer's urge to find random souls in need, or to perhaps embrace another of the Twelve - Byregot - and build a new troupe and a new family, more truly preserving what would otherwise be lost.
There's a particular line of Basho's that is, in essence, what has become his driving impetus:
"Do not seek to follow in the footsteps of the wise. Seek what they sought."
Preservation.
At the core of everything he does - traveling, making music, trying to spread joy, giving others a place and excuse to express themselves, and now possibly building a true future - is a young man who, in one night, lost everyone he cherished most in the world and the one voice who gave him direction. That voice he keeps inside urges him not to grieve, but to bring to others a touch of that sublime contentment that was his younger life, and thus best honor and preserve what might otherwise be completely lost.
He simply struggles to decide how he might best do so, torn between the Wanderer's urge to find random souls in need, or to perhaps embrace another of the Twelve - Byregot - and build a new troupe and a new family, more truly preserving what would otherwise be lost.
There's a particular line of Basho's that is, in essence, what has become his driving impetus:
"Do not seek to follow in the footsteps of the wise. Seek what they sought."
"But in the laugh there was another voice. A clearer laugh, an ironic laugh. A laugh which laughs because it chooses not to weep."