(12-31-2016 04:10 PM)ArmachiA Wrote: Roleplaying can take A LOT of time, for sure. Some sessions I just.. completely forget how long I've been there and suddenly it's 7 hours later. Has she just started rping and this is all new to both of you?She's done plenty of other forum based RP's. So this was her first one in an MMO.
Don't be afraid to tell her you feel like she's spending too much time on the game either. But... do that carefully, she could get defensive quickly.
Anyways. Thanks everyone I'm gonna be busy for the rest of the day. I really wished I asked about this several months ago when the issue was fresh. I'll explain what's happened up until now sometime when I get back. I wanted to hear your thoughts on the situation on what I could have done differently, I'm sorry for the dishonesty on my part. I'll explain what's happened since then.
I'm also partially to blame as well. I did some savage raiding with a different group of people, i felt too guilty to quit the raid group so I kept trying even though I stopped liking it.
This in turn put a small rift between us since this ate a lot of my time and energy. coupled with job I hate.
Encourages me to get a new job instead.
Fast forward a bit: She meets new friend. They grow close, like sisters. Never thought anything of it. Little insecure about the amount of in game gifts that her new friend showers on them. In turn I also try gift showering IRL to win some attention.
Finally get my act together, start new job, quit raid group. Girlfriend goes on vacation with her family. Calls me mid vacation saying she wants a break. (she wants to have some time to herself so she can focus on getting her own life together, full time job, savings etc. bsically be well off enough so she can take care of herself and others in her family) Reluctantly agree because what else can I really do?
New job is ok. Kinda lonely now I don't have a raid group anymore.
Girlfriend starts her married RP relationship with her friend about a week after we go on break, spending A LOT of time together.
we both find out that her friend is a guy playing girl character. That point I'm incredibly insecure with everything. She insists that it's only in character and sees him as nothing more than just a friend out of game. I really wanted to be ok with the RP relationship but I feel like it was the absolute worst possible timing to do that.
So everything is pretty ok on VOIP. but having just been put on break and having to see their two characters being all lovey dovey really felt like the knife twist in my heart. I felt discarded and jealous, especially now since we really didn't spend any time outside of game now. In turn I lashed out.
She broke up with me. I frankly deserved it. The other guy left to play a different MMO.
I feel really guilty about how I acted but I just wasn't ready to deal with that.
At least I think I do. I don't know, I felt abandoned and I lashed out, To have that happen in such a short amount of time, I wasn't sure how I was supposed to take that.
she cares about me a lot, after I fell into a really bad depression, (like seriously I broke down in a grocery store after 3 days trying to keep it together.) She recommended I see a therapist and even gave me the contact info for her old therapist. even offered to pay for it.
so as it stands we're still on good terms. I'm actually going to lunch with her but I really want to get over this I just still feel really guilty about it.
Edit: I do believe it's our goal to get back together eventually, we're both still focusing on financial stability independently at the moment.