Entry 14 - Putting the Pieces Back Together:
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I find myself grabbing at whatever pieces of happiness I can for who knows how long it'll last. After I removed the taint from my body and removed myself from what was causing me trouble, I find myself more at peace. I see things clearly and I'm doing my best to accept more help. I have friends now, ones who I actually trust and hold dear. I might not see them all the time, but they're there when I need them most and I for them.
I left Limitless Reliquary, I enjoyed the company and still keep in touch with them, but I didn't like the idea of being tied to one organization. I travel often and just do my own thing, being confined to one place was making me anxious and I finally decided to pack my bags. Tirion was kind enough to offer a place to stay, somewhere I can go to but not be confined to; It certainly beats tavern hopping.
Things are finally looking up, I pushed past the doom and gloom and now I'm seeing the results of my fighting. Granted, the gloom still creeps back around every now and again but it isn't something that's holding me back anymore. I'm not afraid anymore, I'm ready and I have Tirion, Kami, Valen, Ruran, and Kanko to thank.
These people have also helped me think about my current......'profession'. The title Vigilante sounds wonderful in theory, but it's just filled with hardships and an impossible goal. I can't kill them all and I shouldn't let the blame fall to me, some things are just out of my control. I've considered my options and I'm debating if I should continue on this path. Though I'm sure my ambitions will get the best of me and I just stick with it, but who knows.
Only time will tell.
Entry 15 - Crate:
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That son of a bitch. He's such a vulgar, manipulative, and hateful man. A stupid necromancer who made me think taking his deal was a good idea. The taint in me was finally taken back and I thought everything would be fine. He left me alone, let me do as I pleased and continue my life normally. So why? Why now? Why would he decide to suddenly show up in my life after I had already started making things right again? Perhaps it is his way to torment me, to let me know that I can never truly escape him. I only have one option to deal with him and that's to kill him while I can. I know his weakness and that will be my only time to strike and the most difficult time to find him, during morning and afternoon hours with the sun shining brightly in the sky.
This is also something I can't do alone, I'm lucky to know Ruran who has dealt with many Voidsent before. But what about a Necromancer? I'd like to think he has but, by the gods, I don't want to run a risk of him possibly dying....
What of his pet? He is bounded to Crate and if we eliminate him, will the pet roam free or will it simply 'die' along with him? There are so many questions and if I managed to muster any answers, it just leads to further questions. I know that I have time, after all, I left Crate in quite the weaken state, hells, I probably took him by surprise. I proved that I don't need a Void taint to make me stronger and that's a good thing, I need whatever I can to at least seem intimidating in the slightest. In any case, I have time but I don't know how much.
I need to figure this out and soon as when he returns, I feel like I won't be as lucky as last time.
Entry 16 - Gathering Allies:
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With Crate around again, this is something I just can't ignore. After he took my taint away, I was running away from him, hoping to forget, Â but I'm done running. He wants my life - I'll make it as difficult as possible to take it. I'll gather my allies, ones confident in their abilities and have dealt with Voidsent before.
I'll keep track of who has joined me and who I wish to join me in this endeavor. I forsee myself having to speak to some people who have, well, bitter feelings towards me. But, I must do this and I will do what I must to convince them to join my cause.
So far, Ruran Vas has graciously offered his aid. He has dealt with a lot Voidsent before and I've seen him fight, he can easily hold his own. I hope that Hojo will join the cause but I get the feeling he won't like seeing me again, I can only hope I'll find him while he isn't armed and that's a challenge end of itself. Tirion is a very strong and confident fighter, but he has Kami to watch over and his own problems with that crazy Doman woman. I don't wish to throw more stress on him. Valen, well, I don't think he's dealt with Voidsent before, but uh, I sure as hell know nothing stops him once he's in a fight. Then, there's Aulsoix, I consulted him once before about killing a Voidsent and he stated he would be glad to help if I brought it to his attention, but it's just a matter of finding him and actually having time to sit down and talk to him about the matter.
Crate will regret threatening my life.
He won't know what hit him.
Entry 17 - Following the Trail:
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Like I didn't already have enough to worry about, there was that other one I almost forgot about - Stroud Forscythe. He went silent for a while, couldn't find him and suspicious activity posted in the Tonberry's Lantern was kept at a minimum, if not absent. Sure, my investigation on him was still something I was going to carry out, but it's the last thing I've been worried about these past weeks.
It wasn't until I was looking through old articles about four suns ago that I noticed I had formed a pile of articles about Xaela murders. My original intent was to find anything related to Necromancy, maybe find some info about Crate even if it was just mere rumors, but I found nothing relating to that and only that pile of Xaela murders. I'd say it was still a successful search. When I looked through the papers, some I remembered and others I didn't - These Xaela murders were even occurring before I even wore the face of Marigold and to think, I didn't even notice and if I did, I likely didn't see it as too much of a concern. I'm not entirely shocked that these murders were prominent even that long ago, but it's just the fact of how similar they all are. They were usually women and murdered in Ul'dah or out in Thanalan
Despite this, I still don't have any solid proof to act on it. I've been doing my best to pry for any sort of information from him, make him slip up or try and trigger some sort of emotion to make him act so, in return, I can act in "self-defense", but it's proven to be of no use. But luckily for me, I'm now practically being handed the opportunity to act. It's like it's being given to me on a golden platter.
Last night, we happened to be in the same tavern, he claimed that it was like he was following him, even though I arrived there first. When I stated it sounded more like he was following me, he didn't even bother to respond. It has me suspicious, but I also doubt he's actually following me. He even tried to push me to perform on the small stage the tavern had set-up and I refused to no end; He just wanted to make a fool of me. Shortly after, he decided to perform and it was nothing compared to the others. While the other performers danced and sung happily, he recited rather dark and twisted piece of poetry. It was no surprise for someone like him to recite something like that but it also gave me just a bit of insight as to what he could be thinking about and further proof that, with his mentality, he is likely a man to kill or hire others to do it for him.. After the show, I left and he followed behind me and I wasn't just about to ignore him. After all, I'm taking every chance I get to remind him that I'm still after him.
I lied to him, I told him I was close to having enough evidence to come knocking at his doorstep and taking action. Like usual, he showed no emotion but he did respond in a way I wasn't expecting and I was rather pleased. He invited me to his home, stated he had something that might pique my interest. I can only imagine what it is and I hope it's enough to finally put an end to him,
Even if it isn't, I could just do it anyway. I want to end this while I can and it'll be one less thing I have to worry about.
[The writing on the next page seems to be rather messy as if she was rushing and perhaps writing with her off-hand. It wouldn't even be considered an entry.]
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I couldn't do it.
I failed again.
Couldn't do it. Couldn't do it.