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Advertisement: BRONCO GREASE! - Printable Version

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RE: Advertisement: BRONCO GREASE! - Jmaaira - 08-14-2015

Jay would look at the ad warily. Instead of focusing on the picture, she honed in on the fine print and smirked. Of course this would be Verad's handiwork.

RE: Advertisement: BRONCO GREASE! - Ark - 08-15-2015

Zeke looked up from his table as the flyer was put up, he picked up his cup of tea, nodding to the waitress. Cheeks brightening a bit "seriously? " he glaze sweeping the room as he gets up walking over and inspecting the poster, tea in hand.

"hmm a selling point" eyes skimmed narrowing and reading the small print "at least there is suitable warning...should have tested it though" his taking a sip from the tea in his hand "would sell better as sun protection for costa del sol though." he turns returning to his table

RE: Advertisement: BRONCO GREASE! - Bryn - 08-15-2015

"Wulf. I have an order to collect. Thank you."

The knight deposited the sack of gil upon the counter top with a soft clink. The apothecary, an ageing, skinny and stooped Midlander man who squinted at her from behind his spectacles, nodded and turned toward the back of his stall.

Brynhilde leaned wearily on the counter as the early morning commotion of the exchange fluttered all around her. The long journeys back-and-forth between Ul'dah and Ishgard were taking their toll. Naturally she'd not admit it, but she ached. When she wasn't travelling, she was working; it was no mean feat to keep Cliffperch stocked with food for her charges, and to keep 'Bharfyst' fed and warm. But it was getting no easier, and so Bryn had resolved to work harder. Somehow.

It was as she mused upon her money woes that her eyes settled upon a discarded copy of the Lantern sat atop the counter. She frowned and flipped it over. Staring back at Bryn was that picture; the one that had sparked all the friction between herself and her man, and had caused their worst argument in moons. The Highlander woman, the 'Sultansworn' as Bryn knew her, looked back at her from the picture. With a sneer and a disdainful scoff, Brynhilde tossed the paper away.

"Harlot."

RE: Advertisement: BRONCO GREASE! - GloryRhodes - 08-17-2015

[Image: 1Pt5W8E.jpg]
BRONCO GREASE!
PROTECT THE ONES YOU LOVE!
SERVE THE PUBLIC GOOD!
STAB BADGUYS IN THE FACE!
ON SALE AT THE GRINDSTONE!
5 GIL A BOTTLE!


Dubious Distributions is not responsible for any adverse physical, mental or aetherial effects caused by consumption of Bronco Grease Energy Tonic.  Questions as to the ingredients of Bronco Grease will be met with rhetoric and evasiveness.  Drink at your own risk.


RE: Advertisement: BRONCO GREASE! - McBeefâ„¢ - 08-17-2015

(08-12-2015, 12:31 AM)GloryRhodes Wrote:
(Edited to Include All Ads at Top)
[Image: uO8XWLN.jpg]
Bronco Grease!
Eorzea's Most Powerful Energy Tonic!
Fight Harder!
Last Longer!
KICK SOME ARSE!
ON SALE AT THE GRINDSTONE!
5 Gil a Bottle!




Dubious Distributions is not responsible for any adverse physical, mental or aetherial effects caused by consumption of Bronco Grease Energy Tonic.  Questions as to the ingredients of Bronco Grease will be met with rhetoric and evasiveness.  Drink at your own risk.

Evangeline looks at the paper again, Klyn had found the advertisement while shopping, but she still could not believe it to be true.

Crofte? That Crofte? She would abase herself to such a level? Evangeline always knew the woman lacked breeding and true class, but she had though the Knight had some measure of tact.

The Elezen sighs, placing the paper on the nightstand, "I must admit it suits the woman, though I know not what possessed her to parade herself about so. I shall have to ask her the next time we happen to meet."

She blushes and clears her throat, "Also where she might have gotten that costume."

RE: Advertisement: BRONCO GREASE! - Duplicitous Dame - 08-17-2015

Nahare strolled along the street with a Limsan tune cheerily hummed upon her lips. Golden hues would catch sight of a Bronco Grease advertisement, but it was the woman upon it that caused the Seeker to stop in her tracks. "Bloody 'ells!" She exclaimed, lips agape in awe. The woman in question was none other than Lady Croft herself. "Ye may be a stubborn broad, but Twelves be damned if'n ye ain't got a nice arse! PAHAHAHA~!" Nahare cackled and snorted evilly, ears wiggling with a twisted sense of glee as she continued on her way.

RE: Advertisement: BRONCO GREASE! - Gegenji - 08-17-2015

(08-17-2015, 01:02 AM)GloryRhodes Wrote:
[Image: 1Pt5W8E.jpg]
BRONCO GREASE!
PROTECT THE ONES YOU LOVE!
SERVE THE PUBLIC GOOD!
STAB BADGUYS IN THE FACE!
ON SALE AT THE GRINDSTONE!
5 GIL A BOTTLE!


Dubious Distributions is not responsible for any adverse physical, mental or aetherial effects caused by consumption of Bronco Grease Energy Tonic.  Questions as to the ingredients of Bronco Grease will be met with rhetoric and evasiveness.  Drink at your own risk.

Chachan's cheeks were flushed lightly in embarrassment as Momodi nigh-on pushed the copy of the Lantern into his hands, eager to know how the little smith had wounded up posing for Spahro in the rain without his cuirass. And, to be honest, the little Dunesfolk wasn't entirely sure how he ended up as part of that photo shoot either. In all the chaos in the Still Shore's main hall, he had somehow gotten shanghaied and brought out to the grassy expanses north of Summerford Farms to serve as a poster child for a product he knew nothing about. And, while the posing turned out to be a lot less horrible than he had thought it would've been - considering Spahro had made heavy mention of using subligar to show off the burly little popoto's surprisingly un-Lalafellan muscle tone - the rest of the trip had certainly been... interesting. Especially the second half at the other locale in Limsa...

The little Gegenji's freckled cheeks burned even more at the mere thought of it, remembering the costume and the series of poses he bore witness to. Shaking his head to avoid having to explain even more to the ever-attentive Momodi, Chachanji turned his focus back onto this particular picture. He was rather glad that Spahro had kept that protecting line he had liked, but that shorter one she had suddenly thought up afterward - "Small Package, Big Punch" - still struck him as slightly... off. And it certainly seemed like more of the female population were sending glances his way and hiding giggles this sun as he went about his errands. Or maybe he was just being overly self-conscious after his sudden modeling debut. He could only awkwardly wonder the hows and whys as he handed the paper back to the proprietor of the Quicksand, perhaps a little too eager to change the subject and find out what the next task she had for him was...

RE: Advertisement: BRONCO GREASE! - GloryRhodes - 08-17-2015

INSPIRED BY THE MAELSTROM!
A NEW FLAVOR RISES FROM THE DEPTHS!
BRONCO STORM!
[Image: kJMFwON.jpg]
STRONGER THAN A CANNON SHOT!
MORE POWERFUL THAN AN AXE!
SMARTER THAN A STUPID BOOK!
BRONCO STORM!
ON SALE AT THE GRINDSTONE!
7 GIL A BOTTLE!


Dubious Distributions is not responsible for any adverse physical, mental or aetherial effects caused by consumption of Bronco Grease Energy Tonic.  Questions as to the ingredients of Bronco Grease will be met with rhetoric and evasiveness.  Drink at your own risk.


RE: Advertisement: BRONCO GREASE! - Oscare - 08-17-2015

Oscare grabs the poster off the wooden stall, staring very hard at the person in the photo. It wasn't a stare of attraction or awe, it was one of thought.

"Haven't I seen this girl somewhere...?" The blonde hair and face was familiar enough, but the body was a fuzzy outline of someone else -- wait!

Edda? Well, the name is scrawled in huge red ink on the bottom. But this was strange, Edda never seemed to be the type to take outwardly skeevy photos like this. Maybe the man just didn't know enough about her...

He quietly folds and stashes the poster into his belt.

RE: Advertisement: BRONCO GREASE! - Desu Nee - 08-17-2015

Quki simply stares at the posters, slighty dumbfounded. She...recognized some of these faces, purely by osmosis, but...Chanchan. THAT Chanchan she knows? She couldn't help but feel intrigued, slighty disgusted...and simply curious. Now this story she NEEDED to know about. Tearing off one of Chachanji Posters, she goes on her wall...

Later that day, she would take another for personal keep. No one needed to know.

RE: Advertisement: BRONCO GREASE! - Wymsical - 08-17-2015

Coming across the advertisements was no accident and Ashmira went straight to the place so aptly named: Dubious Distributions. Or was it Dubious Deliveries? She had been, admittedly, somewhat distracted when she heard it. But she didn't even reach halfway there when she saw a stand heaped with publications, two different advertisements staring out in garish, partially unclad glory. Plucking up both, she regarded them with a careful eye, first inspecting how the primping and preening she had performed on both female models had resulted. Jana looked much improved considering how very dismal the poor Miqo'te had seemed about her impromptu drafting. And Edda... well.

She held both to the light for a better look, luminous eyes flicking between them but finally settling on the latter, setting the first down carefully so she would not crinkle it for others. She gingerly folded up the ad bearing fireworks and a red bikini, tucking it into her satchel. This one, she meant to keep. A sly grin toyed at her lips as she patted the pocket where it had been stowed.

RE: Advertisement: BRONCO GREASE! - Zac Evans - 08-17-2015

Red. Redder than red. Red as Dalamud during the Calamity.

It was the only way to describe Zac's entire body as he stared at the form of a highly familiar Highlander woman, clad in armor highly similar to his own. His eyes roamed the page slowly, breath shallow. He leaned back on his barrack bed, unable to look away. The heat coming from his body should've been enough to set flame to the cloth covers! 

'No...it couldn't be. Could it?'  he thought to himself.  'No. NO! Crofte isn't that type of woman.'


But she WAS a woman none the less...


"Evans! Are you decent?" Came Raging Behemoth's room shaking shout, causing Zac to scream in horror as he threw the magazine clear out the nearby window!!!


RE: Advertisement: BRONCO GREASE! - Edgar - 08-17-2015

Edgar peers up from the advertisement in his morning paper, within the confines of the Missing Member.

"...By gods. The madness never stops, does it?"

RE: Advertisement: BRONCO GREASE! - Coatleque - 08-17-2015

Even as far north as Dragonhead it seemed that Dubious Distributions was making headway to the markets. Coatleque had been staying at the inn and was greeted almost daily down by the kitchens to another poster advertisement. Thankfully she was far enough away from Thanalan that nobody had recognized her. The thick, drab colored robes she wore may have helped with that.

A hand rubbed the side of her face as she scanned from one ad to another, recognizing each 'model' in turn. "Oh... Miss Llorn, what have you done?", she muttered quietly to herself. At least her personal shame had now been lessened.

RE: Advertisement: BRONCO GREASE! - Edda - 08-18-2015

For all its quiet and peaceful air, Fallgourd Float was by no means a far removed hamlet. With the sudden opening of Ishgard's gates, the town now saw more people passing through its gates than ever before. Even still, it was not uncommon for mail to arrive several suns late - whether through negligence of the Moogles, or some unclear force that plagued the Northern Shroud.

It was a cloudy morning when Edda received two letters in the mail, both enclosed with her family seal. She frowned as she took them up to her room. Her more recent trip to Vylbrand had been tiring, ending with a rather strange encounter with Spahro Llorn, whom she had not seen in over half a cycle. Edda opening the first of the letter. Enclosed was a small note, and a neatly folded copy of the advertisement Spahro had mentioned. She squinted at it. The fireworks enhanced the advertisement indeed, but only seven gil? A questionable amount. Edda looked to the note, filled with the gentle script of her mother's hand.

Quote:Dearest Daughter,

While I have little concern with what you do in your spare time so long as you remain safe, your most recent adventure has made the rounds with the staff, before unceremoniously falling into my lap. I have sent you a copy in case you yourself have not seen it. I have been working tirelessly to keep the newest Lantern out of Ennis' hands, though moreso your father. However, it is only a matter of time before he discovers it - you know how he is. At the very least he will be pleased that the flavor associated with you is being sold at a higher price, but I cannot promise much more than that. Consider this letter your fair warning in advance. Good luck!

-Marian Eglantine

Grateful that her mother at least had the care to let her know, Edda opened the next letter. Inside was the very same advertisement her mother had sent, but in notably worse condition, as if it had been crumpled in an angry fist. The small note read:

Quote:Explain this.

-E