(12-24-2014, 04:07 PM)Edvyn Wrote: i am bringing up an actual concern - namely that there are people who use polyamory as an excuse rather than a storytelling device

(12-24-2014, 04:18 PM)ArmachiA Wrote: It's true, people DO do that, but it's actually pretty easy to sort them out  by using tricks for anyone who tries to just get with your character (Trying to get into a relationship too fast, falling in love with your character in one meeting, pressuring you for erp, etc etc). As someone who is completely open to the idea of polyamory irl, I'm even concerned about the people who only use it in roleplay to get their rocks off, but it's like that with anything sexual and you just need to be wary of the red flags

(12-24-2014, 04:07 PM)Edvyn Wrote:

(12-24-2014, 04:06 PM)Faye Wrote: But to give an answer in vain: Does it really matter? If someone wants to ERP everyone and call it polyamory, more power to 'em. I don't see why it should really matter to anyone. Likely, the type of people to do that would practice polyamory IRL, even if closeted, if they could find the right partner. Regardless, why does it matter what someone would or wouldn't do IRL? I wouldn't do 75% of the things my characters do. If you would do all the same things your character would, you're not role-playing, you're inserting yourself into a fantasy universe.

i am bringing up an actual concern - namely that there are people who use polyamory as an excuse rather than a storytelling device

it doesn't matter what someone would/wouldn't do irl, I am questioning people's intent in rping "polyamory" as I have seen far too many cases in my years spent in other games/sites of creepy straight dudes playing lesbians that sleep with everyone and aggressively seek out people to erp with - even if those people don't want to erp with them. these dudes almost definitely wouldn't practice polyamory irl, some I've dealt with actively opposed it.

is it wrong to find an ethical problem in genuine sexualities/sexual practices being exploited by horny nerds looking for cheap imaginary sex?

(12-24-2014, 04:24 PM)Faye Wrote:

(12-24-2014, 04:07 PM)Edvyn Wrote:

(12-24-2014, 04:06 PM)Faye Wrote: But to give an answer in vain: Does it really matter? If someone wants to ERP everyone and call it polyamory, more power to 'em. I don't see why it should really matter to anyone. Likely, the type of people to do that would practice polyamory IRL, even if closeted, if they could find the right partner. Regardless, why does it matter what someone would or wouldn't do IRL? I wouldn't do 75% of the things my characters do. If you would do all the same things your character would, you're not role-playing, you're inserting yourself into a fantasy universe.

i am bringing up an actual concern - namely that there are people who use polyamory as an excuse rather than a storytelling device

it doesn't matter what someone would/wouldn't do irl, I am questioning people's intent in rping "polyamory" as I have seen far too many cases in my years spent in other games/sites of creepy straight dudes playing lesbians that sleep with everyone and aggressively seek out people to erp with - even if those people don't want to erp with them. these dudes almost definitely wouldn't practice polyamory irl, some I've dealt with actively opposed it.

is it wrong to find an ethical problem in genuine sexualities/sexual practices being exploited by horny nerds looking for cheap imaginary sex?

Sort of? It's sleazy, for sure, and it's obviously not okay if they're trying to force/pressure/trick people into doing sexual things with them. But if everyone involved is a consenting adult OOC and anything scandalous is done in private, if they want to role-play sexual polyamory to try to get off IRL, good for them, I guess. It's not my cup of tea and I personally don't approve, but I won't fault them for it or try to police their RP.

(12-24-2014, 04:24 PM)Faye Wrote: I find people exploit a lot of actual RL relationship/sexual/gender issues in the name of sexual fetishes--most futas pretty much making a mockery of transgender people, for example. It's tasteless, but at the end of the day it's meant to be in the name of fun and fantasy. And if that's their idea of fun... well, at least they're enjoying themselves.

(12-24-2014, 04:27 PM)Edvyn Wrote:

(12-24-2014, 04:24 PM)Faye Wrote:

(12-24-2014, 04:07 PM)Edvyn Wrote:

(12-24-2014, 04:06 PM)Faye Wrote: But to give an answer in vain: Does it really matter? If someone wants to ERP everyone and call it polyamory, more power to 'em. I don't see why it should really matter to anyone. Likely, the type of people to do that would practice polyamory IRL, even if closeted, if they could find the right partner. Regardless, why does it matter what someone would or wouldn't do IRL? I wouldn't do 75% of the things my characters do. If you would do all the same things your character would, you're not role-playing, you're inserting yourself into a fantasy universe.

i am bringing up an actual concern - namely that there are people who use polyamory as an excuse rather than a storytelling device

it doesn't matter what someone would/wouldn't do irl, I am questioning people's intent in rping "polyamory" as I have seen far too many cases in my years spent in other games/sites of creepy straight dudes playing lesbians that sleep with everyone and aggressively seek out people to erp with - even if those people don't want to erp with them. these dudes almost definitely wouldn't practice polyamory irl, some I've dealt with actively opposed it.

is it wrong to find an ethical problem in genuine sexualities/sexual practices being exploited by horny nerds looking for cheap imaginary sex?

Sort of? It's sleazy, for sure, and it's obviously not okay if they're trying to force/pressure/trick people into doing sexual things with them. But if everyone involved is a consenting adult OOC and anything scandalous is done in private, if they want to role-play sexual polyamory to try to get off IRL, good for them, I guess. It's not my cup of tea and I personally don't approve, but I won't fault them for it or try to police their RP.

these people are trying to force/pressure/trick people into doing sexual things with them, and this is where the problem lies! I have personally dealt with people trying to guilt trip me - as in me the player, not just the character! - for not responding well to their hamfisted attempts to drag me into gross cybersex

(12-24-2014, 04:27 PM)Edvyn Wrote: these people are trying to force/pressure/trick people into doing sexual things with them, and this is where the problem lies! I have personally dealt with people trying to guilt trip me - as in me the player, not just the character! - for not responding well to their hamfisted attempts to drag me into gross cybersex

(12-24-2014, 04:34 PM)Tiergan Wrote:

(12-24-2014, 04:27 PM)Edvyn Wrote: these people are trying to force/pressure/trick people into doing sexual things with them, and this is where the problem lies! I have personally dealt with people trying to guilt trip me - as in me the player, not just the character! - for not responding well to their hamfisted attempts to drag me into gross cybersex

I think if you encounter anyone who tries to guilt trip you as a player into anything you don't want to do - whether it be ERP or Poly related or not - that is the moment where you OOCly tell them you're no longer comfortable RPing with them and block them.  People like that are not worth the trouble and they probably have other motives for pursing the RP that they are - not to mention the rampant IC/OOC mixing that will probably happen.

(12-24-2014, 04:32 PM)ArmachiA Wrote: It's definitely an issue. I think it would actually be a valid thing for Lili to put in her guide - concerns and such. People who only want to erp are everywhere in roleplay and if that isn't your goal it can be hard to know who is and who isn't.

(12-24-2014, 10:11 AM)Lilithium Wrote:

Just because you canoodle the doodle or poodle of other people on a regular basis and have some pieces of buttcandy on speed dial on the linkpearl doesn't make one polyamorous. To quote from wikipedia:

Quote:...the practice, desire, or acceptance of having more than one intimate relationship at a time with the knowledge and consent of everyone involved. It is distinct from swinging (which emphasizes sex with others as merely recreational)...

So chances are the character is likely just a 'swinger' if sex is the main focus.

(12-24-2014, 05:34 PM)Intaki Wrote: On the subject of traditional Seeker mating practices, I don't think the Nunhs (because remember, many tribes have more than one) really keep a harem. I've always thought that the relationship the Nunh has with the women he mates is more businesslike (like someone else mentioned). Basically, if a Seeker woman decides she wants to have children then she makes an appointment, gets an injection, and that's that.