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[Balmung] Male Miqo'te offering lovely 'dates' and company! - Printable Version

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+--- Thread: [Balmung] Male Miqo'te offering lovely 'dates' and company! (/showthread.php?tid=13605)

Male Miqo'te offering lovely 'dates' and company! - Zetchryn - 09-27-2015

A flier has been making it's way throughout certain cities, on it, a rather EXTRAVAGANT young Miqo'te with blue (yes, blue!) hair can be seen.


[Image: 40e8ee495b97d3ca994e427a83ea5cd8.png]

YOU THERE! Sir and/or Madam!
Are you looking for love? Well then, this is the WRONG flier for you!
Are you looking for companionship, company, and some spice in your life?
Then this is the RIGHT flier for you!
I, the great, the astounding, the superbly handsome, the agile...
(It goes on like this for some length)
HUMBLE! O'rane,
Offer you the chance at a once in a lifetime offer!
Well, once if it goes particularly bad. Perhaps multiple times otherwise.
Hopefully multiple times...
I mean, I am pretty awesome after all!
BUT REGARDLESS!

I am offering you, the positively amazing chance to go out on a date, with ME!
Men, tired of the ladies and their blushing faces, their shy demeanor?
Why? You're odd. BUT STILL! I too can satisfy the need for companionship*
I too can make your deepest desires** come true!
Come now, it's not like anyone slapping a sausage is truly that horrible, no?

LADIES!
What, you thought I was just interested in the men?
FAR FROM IT!
Due to popular demand
(By which I mean, noone objected to it!)
Ladies are included in this deal too!

Ladies, do you desire someone to take you out and treat you like a true lady?
Do you wish someone would STOP treating you like just a lady?
Do you like free meals and/or vacations?

THIS IS YOUR CHANCE




Come, now, and schedule your VERY OWN DATE, with the AMAZING....
...
...
...
HUMBLE! O'rane!

Available now, for 5 easy payments of 5 million gil!

But! ACT NOW! And receive a special 99.9% discount, TODAY!




Available in a city near you, while supplies last. Addons sold separately. Some assembly required.




*Purely on a platonic nature!

**Cannot actually grant wishes.


RE: Male Miqo'te offering lovely 'dates' and company! - Roe Dad - 09-27-2015

This made me laugh. I had to read it like one of those infomercial people. All it needed was at the end and all this can be yours for 5 easy payment!Laugh

RE: Male Miqo'te offering lovely 'dates' and company! - Zetchryn - 09-27-2015

(09-27-2015, 01:37 PM)Okhi Lyehga Wrote: This made me laugh. I had to read it like one of those infomercial people. All it needed was at the end and all this can be yours for 5 easy payment!Laugh


Don't worry, I fixed it.

RE: Male Miqo'te offering lovely 'dates' and company! - Roe Dad - 09-27-2015

(09-27-2015, 01:59 PM)Zetchryn Wrote:
(09-27-2015, 01:37 PM)Okhi Lyehga Wrote: This made me laugh. I had to read it like one of those infomercial people. All it needed was at the end and all this can be yours for 5 easy payment!Laugh


Don't worry, I fixed it.
So it only costs 25000 gil after mail in rebates what a DEAL!

RE: Male Miqo'te offering lovely 'dates' and company! - Zetchryn - 09-27-2015

I would like to note it doesn't actually cost anything. That last bit IS just a joke.