Ok, read the whole thing...... here we go with my unwanted opinion.
1. IC/OOC Bleed
This happens to alot of RPers, that has been said 58 times in this thread alone I am sure. When you spend hours on end... days, weeks, months pretending to be this amazing person you made, you can forget its all a game. A game effecting you is not cool for you, you deserve better. Now old Papa Erik has been RPing since the days of yore, in the lands of Tables and Doritos, in the ancient 80's and he has learned a trick or two to handle this bleed. You push so much of your personality and life experiences through the character that the bleed goes the other way. This shields you a bit from IC drama, though on a bad day it can be less fun for characters you roll with, but if that's the case you probably don't feel like logging anyway. If your cranky, its ok for your toon to be cranky, but never ok for something in game to effect you. If that happens, log out, go see a flick or something and force yourself to stay out until you have fixed your head. I don't say this to be mean, I say it because I care. A game should never effect your real life in a negative way, if it does, its time to log out.
2. OOC Guidance
"So uh.... his RP sucks.... Should we, IDK, tell him nicely he sucks?"
No, no, no, no, no, no, nonononononononononoooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Don't be that guy, don't be a RP snob and tell someone they suck, no matter how much they suck, no matter how far in left field they are from the lore. You know why? Because its not your place to tell another paying player they suck, no matter how nice. Now here is what you do.... or what I do. If you see a sucky RPer.... become their friend. Don't let them know you think they suck, just friend them. Now what you say? Add them to your story, let them watch you, and others interact. Unless they are braindamaged they will catch on, and what do you know, they are better because you lead by example instead of OOC correcting them like a dick, to which they ignored you anyway. Keeping quality in a server is the responsibility of every player, SE or Freelance Wizard isn't going to do it for us. You heard the lady, "Let those who walk before, lead those who walk after." Its in the damn theme song people. Lead, don't lecture.
3. ERP
I am a 34 year old man living in the US. I.... love.... sex. I said it. Now that said, ERP is not my cup of tea often. It has to be 1. with someone of trust and quality, 2. someone who won't IC/OOC bleed from it, 3. make sense for the character and the moment. That's a high bar, and to date in this game it has only been cleared by 2 players. It happens, and as stated its no big deal unless you have some issues, which is ok if you do. It has been my experience that most ERPer on this server are pretty good about it. They stick to PMs or try to find a quiet out of the way place and try not to be trouble. Sure the QS gets pretty blue late at night, but for the most part other MMOs have it much worse. Hell, the Ebonheart Pact areas are basically open world whore houses on TESO. Now as for the.... creative stuff, again, who are we to judge? Is it lore breaking? That question..... um.... no it is not. There is nowhere in the Lore that forbids you getting creative with your biological makeup. There was no mission in 1.0 where the Flame General specifically said "There Shall Be But One Winky Per Man, And One Clam Per Lady.... SO SAITH THE LORE!" There are transgender people in real life. There are hermaphrodites in real life. There are gay people in real life. Real life is amazing because its crazy random, enjoy it. If someone wants to play a character that some would call "abnormal", well good for them. Like Mama Mynhier use to tell her baby boy, "If you and I were the same, they would only need one of us." If it gets to weird for me that's what Blist is for. Don't sweat the Lore, you'll be happier and live longer.
4. Conclusion
We are all cool folks here. I don't have to tell you, many of whom have walked the winding roads of MMO cesspool communities enough to know we have a pretty good thing going here for us. I've never been in a place this nice, where players get along. That said I am noticing cracks in this community on our happy little Balmung. I cannot be the only one to notice the heat spiking more and more here on these forums, the clicks forming in-game. Its bad ladies and gentlemen. Its bad because it will ruin it. We all are people behind the screens, we are all friends. If you saw me on the street you would be like "DUDE!" And I would to you. We all have to pay that $15 a month, but we don't have to play the same. I can play my spy game while you play your cop game, while she plays her ERP game. Its cool, you know why? Because its cool thats why. We are all friends and this server and community is big enough for all of us. Its a game, what happens ingame is ingame, but we are cool people, because we chose to become friends here. We post pics of ourselves, talk about updates, chat about our real lives in PM. We care about the people behind the screen, that's the good kind of IC/OOC bleed, we care. So let's take that with us, lets get along and make the other RP communities say "I wish our community was cool like their's." And let us not forget the words of the great ones as we go forth....