(02-06-2015, 02:01 PM)Zhavi Wrote:(02-06-2015, 01:51 PM)Nebbs Wrote: I think you describe just normal interaction, RP as an activity may loosen some of the normal constraints but such trouble is not limited to the RP community.
I have tried many approaches, but I am left feeling that people's feelings are not bound by rules and their "self" will come through in the end. Everyone is flawed, so expect trouble.
Take guilds for example, they filter applications so that they narrow the people to a "type", even then every guild I have been in has troubles. People cause the troubles not the characters.Â
My own approach is to be "casual" and not take it too seriously (I take RP seriously and prefer 100% IC, I hate OOC attempts to fix the outcome).On the few occasions I have gotten close to people due to great RP that leads to OOC friendship, it dies in the end. But then at my age that sometimes takes a long time and in some cases decades. The RP friends that I have that have persisted are those that I have a relaxed interaction with rather than any intense RP.
Maybe I am agreeing with you, and that deep involved RP goes too deep, and it is best to keep it more superficial with some hard separation. (or maybe that is not what you are saying?)
And.. to add.. if people do want to cross some conceptual line and not keep it separate.. I wish them luck. If it is consensual then I'd back it. But then I dislike imposed rules and stereotyping people.
The line is there to keep people safe. Â I mean. . .would you wish someone luck if someone started stalking you? Â I didn't just pull that out of my hat, I have known people who that has happened to, who showed me the messages, whose addresses were dug up, whose identities were revealed. Â It is not good. Too, I have seen instances where predators would use rp sites to dig up young players and try to gain their trust -- also extremely bad.
I'm not saying like, never allow any ic/ooc cross happen, I'm saying what Tiergan was saying -- do no harm. Â Don't allow the emotions the rp provokes in you to make yourself or someone else feel shitty irl. Â That ain't cool.
And yeah, I agree that some small part of yourself will come through, but the idea is to stop it from becoming something negative. Â If I am frustrated by something that happens icly, I don't take that frustration out on the people I'm playing with! Â I don't try to guilt them, or make them feel bad, or get angry with them! Â Similarly, I don't blame them for what happens. Â I might not like it, but rp happens, and imo it's key to understand that they are playing their characters the best way they can, just as I am with mine. Â Being willing to communicate, and not take things personally, is instrumental to having a good experience and helping those around you have a good experience, too.
I would agree with the "do no harm" but I'd also add, "be wary" and don't expect others to play by your rules.
Be resilient, I wish I was more resilient.
Maybe then we don't have to deal with the extremes. But I think extreme people will be extreme whatever rules you try.
Heck, you should hear how PvE upsets people and that is just key pressing.. imagine how much something you created, crafted and invested your imagination in is going to tug on your feelings when it goes a little wrong.
Char:Â [Nebula Stardancer] Â FC: [East Eerie Trading Co]
Link Shells: [Hugs & Cakes] Â [Witches' Wyrd Web]
