I think the "people first" approach to writing women is good in theory, but rarely bears out very well in practice. It's somewhat the same approach as saying that you 'don't see color' -- gender and race matter very much and the society in which they're placed will yield different experiences, expected roles, and so forth. I think it's a very bad idea to cast those things aside and smooth it out as all people having equal experiences.
If you want to write convincingly for a different gender (or someone who is agender, genderqueer, etc.), it's important to REALLY pay attention to the societal context you're given. The XIV world in particular is rife with female leaders and politicians, but still has troupes of half-naked cat-girls dancing in the streets for cheering men. There are formidable female warriors and wizards, but women stuck in pirate caves swearing on "what little virtue they have left". It's a weird world where some vestiges of conservative values are maintained where in other situations, there are more progressive ideas that get teased out.
If wish fulfillment is what you're going for, I mean...feel free, play how you want, it's your free time and you can assume the risk, however slight, of insulting other people with an unintentionally offensive depiction (I've had guys playing women who tell me at length IC about how much they looOOOoove when men sexually harass them...) but if your aim is to write convincingly as a member of another gender, it's really important to consider it from a three-dimensional angle and consider staying far away from common stereotypes/tropes. Personally? When I get a whiff that someone's playing close to common (and often sexist) tropes, I lose a lot of respect and run very, very far away.
If you want to write convincingly for a different gender (or someone who is agender, genderqueer, etc.), it's important to REALLY pay attention to the societal context you're given. The XIV world in particular is rife with female leaders and politicians, but still has troupes of half-naked cat-girls dancing in the streets for cheering men. There are formidable female warriors and wizards, but women stuck in pirate caves swearing on "what little virtue they have left". It's a weird world where some vestiges of conservative values are maintained where in other situations, there are more progressive ideas that get teased out.
If wish fulfillment is what you're going for, I mean...feel free, play how you want, it's your free time and you can assume the risk, however slight, of insulting other people with an unintentionally offensive depiction (I've had guys playing women who tell me at length IC about how much they looOOOoove when men sexually harass them...) but if your aim is to write convincingly as a member of another gender, it's really important to consider it from a three-dimensional angle and consider staying far away from common stereotypes/tropes. Personally? When I get a whiff that someone's playing close to common (and often sexist) tropes, I lose a lot of respect and run very, very far away.