(03-27-2015, 01:52 PM)Graeham Ridgefield Wrote:(03-27-2015, 01:46 PM)Melkire Wrote: No one said it was. Fault isn't the topic here. Assigning blame isn't, either.
Identification of what, exactly, folks are having trouble with, and how those of us who are available to help can help them is ideally what's up for discussion. Communication here isn't a two-way street, it's a town square with folks standing around all over the place.
I'd love to hear more from newer members of the community and members who aren't new but are still trying to break through. What I'd like to hear more of is:
1. What they've tried.
2. What they haven't tried.
3. What they think might help them.
4. What they think isn't helping them.
I've been playing FFXIV on and off since the game's relaunch, personally. Yet despite multiple attempts to get involved with more than just brief meetings in the Quicksand it was only when I stumbled across my current FC that I actually felt welcome.
Now, I'm not new to role-play by any means. I've led events and role-playing guilds back when I devoted my MMO time to WoW. I've got a pretty big load of ideas for planned events and the like yet any attempt to break into the community outside of my FC often falls flat.
People say they're open to being approached in-game or that they're happy to join a particularly intriguing fresh LS and yet when push comes to shove they don't deliver on that promise. It's understandable if they're busy or swamped with other matters but if so maybe they shouldn't be giving people false hope by saying 'sure, I'll get involved' and then not doing anything.
As you can no doubt imagine it becomes even more frustrating when those same individuals then come to this very thread and feign innocence or deflect blame by making it seem like those putting in genuine effort need to do more to get involved.
It's a dangerous, vicious cycle and I for one will be doing what I can to try to end it. Though for that to happen we need acknowledgement and humility from those responsible.
The first thing I want to ask: did you ever try anywhere other than the Quicksand and your FC? Anywhere other than a tavern, or a tavern night, or a large-scale event where your emotes can get lost in all the noise of people chatting it up with their own friends?
And I acknowledge that many of us do, in fact, make false promises. We're human, and it happens. I've lost track of the number of times I've told newcomers and friends alike that I'll have time for them at such-and-such date-and-time, and yet it never happened because I got swamped, or I was pulled away for something else, etc. I see a lot of it happening here on the Welcome Desk and Making Connections board because people are more interested in looking and appearing nice and friendly than they are in committing to meeting someone (again, I've been guilty of this).
What I can tell you is that guilt-tripping folks isn't going to help. It's just going to make your case, and the cases of those like you, even worse. Acknowledgement is already here, courtesy of the fact that this thread exists, and we've had numerous threads like it. It's an on-going problem, and the awareness is on-going, too. It's not like we didn't know this was a problem - we did. We have known.
And asking for humility? That, more than anything else, is going to cause hairs to bristle, because you're implying that folks aren't humble, and that's insulting, because it implies that we're all self-centered egomaniacs who don't care.
EDIT: I'd like to echo what Berrod said.
![[Image: 1qVSsTp.png]](http://i.imgur.com/1qVSsTp.png)
