Note the following: I know you mentioned that you didn't have much knowledge on lore. I'm not super strict on lore adherence, so bend the lore however you feel like. That said, some of my notes will be directed to lore adherence or the lack thereof, and that certain players may avoid you depending on how plausible your character is. If that bothers you, feel free to ignore these pointers as you wish.
First off, consider taking this test and seeing how your character scores.
An important thing to note is this: your roleplaying character shouldn't be tied into what you have accomplished in-game. Generally speaking, your roleplaying character isn't the protagonist or the hero, your character is a smaller part of a much bigger setting. If you want to roleplay as the protagonist and hero, then that is acceptable so long as you understand and accept the implications as well.
Essentially, you need to trim the fat. Don't tie your character's abilities to everything you have levelled in-game. When you are assigning him abilities or skills, think about why he has those skills, and what purpose they serve in defining him as a person.
Like I said, lore bending and lore breaking is, in and of itself, perfectly fine, as long as you're aware that many people will avoid you or refuse to roleplay with you as a result. If that's acceptable for you, then play however you feel!
That said, having been directly involved with storyline events or storyline characters is a huge Mary Sue red flag. We're talking "The Japanese are bombing Pearl Harbor, Mr. President" levels of red flag. The only one who'd successfully fought the primals and worked directly with the scions is the "main character", that is, the Warrior of Light. Again, it's acceptable for you to roleplay as the WoL as long as you accept other roleplayers avoiding you.
I'm not even going to bother asking how one wins a fight with a Primal "diplomatically" unless it consists of defeating Titan at Monopoly or something.
See my above point about tying your character into story events.
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Okay, so here are some notes for you to use.
First things first: listing your character in terms of "pros" and "cons" isn't an unworkable method but is generally very inflexible and very poor at defining who your character is. When you're writing your character, simply thinking "how is he good" and "how is he bad" is an incredibly narrow mindset when it comes to, essentially, defining another person.
Your character is defined by his character; that is, the central element is his personality. How does he react to certain things? How does he handle failure? What makes him laugh? What makes him angry? Is he talkative? Silent? What kind of person is he? Is he stoic? Serious? Lighthearted? Cocky? How are these elements tied into his past? Was he inspired to be one way or another? Does he refuse to act a certain way? Why?
In addition, character "flaws" need to be actual flaws. They need to be things that will actually damage him or impede his progress in overcoming obstacles, and should present a meaningful challenge to himself and his relationships with others. If he's prideful, then demonstrate or think of an occasion where his pride lead to him failing. Perhaps he gambled everything on an investment and refused to drop out, leading to him being in debt or losing most of his money.
Tying into the above, things like "trauma" or "addiction" are not terms to be thrown around lightly unless they are clearly used as exaggeration or jest. How does his "trauma" affect him? Is he actually affected by it, or is it something used just to make the character look edgy and cool for surviving it? What implications does trauma have? Does he suffer from flashbacks or nightmares? How does this affect how he deals with other people? Similarly, "addiction". How has his addiction damaged himself or his businesses or his relationships with other people? If he's suffering from withdrawal, does it seriously affect him? How? Is this a major obstacle in who he is?
In the end, the lesson is this: a character is built through adversity. A character who is the hero who wins and succeeds all the time is just a boring self-insert power fantasy. It's the characters who struggle with themselves and with others, the characters who try their damndest yet still fail that compel people.
So, as you write your character, constantly ask yourself the five "W"s of narrative structure: who, what, where, when, and most importantly, why. Who is he? Who is important to him? Who does he hate? What does he do? What does he want to do? What got in his way? Where did he learn things? Where does he want to go? Where are his priorities? When did he learn his skills? When did parts of his past happen? When is he going to advance his ambitions? Why is he the person he is? Why does he want to do a certain thing or things? Why should other characters take him seriously?
I wish you luck.
First off, consider taking this test and seeing how your character scores.
An important thing to note is this: your roleplaying character shouldn't be tied into what you have accomplished in-game. Generally speaking, your roleplaying character isn't the protagonist or the hero, your character is a smaller part of a much bigger setting. If you want to roleplay as the protagonist and hero, then that is acceptable so long as you understand and accept the implications as well.
Quote:Zachary is an adult Au Ra.ÂWhere does your character's name come from? Naming conventions for Au Ra haven't been released yet, but it's highly unlikely that the a mundane Western name would be common from a foreign race originating in Othard. Was he raised somewhere else? Is he Raen? Xaela? How might his heritage have affected how he operates within his chosen profession? Why is he an Au Ra?
Quote:Has practiced and has weapon skills in Guns, Knives, 2hand swords, Axes, and books.What age is he? A very common mistake for inexperienced roleplayers is to make very broad assumptions in how long it takes to master a skill. Excelling at a skill enough to be called a "master" should take a wealth of experience and, for magical arts, many years of study, and to label your character as a "prodigy" in these fields is classic Mary Sue material. How has he had the time to adequately learn combat arts and magical arts? Where did he find the soulstone to learn summoning, and how did he survive the tempering process in order to learn it? How long has he spent as an acolyte to learn Thaumaturgy? How long had he spent as an arcanist? If he's also an experienced trader, then how did he have the time to consistently practice these skills enough to be combat-effective with them?
Magical Skill is linked to Arcanist, Summoning, Alchemy, Dark Thuarmaturgy Thaumaturgy Magic
Essentially, you need to trim the fat. Don't tie your character's abilities to everything you have levelled in-game. When you are assigning him abilities or skills, think about why he has those skills, and what purpose they serve in defining him as a person.
Quote:Fairly Rich thanks to smart investments and sales.Show, don't tell. Don't just "tell" people that he's "above average in intelligence", that does nothing. If he's a businessman, merely mentioning that he is wealthy and successful is generally enough to give the general idea that he is keen. Otherwise, don't mention his intelligence as part of his backstory, demonstrate it through interactions or stories. Other people and characters will, on their own, determine whether or not he is intelligent.
Has an above average intelligence.
Quote:Works as a financial contributor to the Scions of Seventh Dawn.BZZZZZT
Has fought 5 primals. Â 3 fights he won. 2 he settled diplomatically.
A true warrior of light works under him in his guild.
Like I said, lore bending and lore breaking is, in and of itself, perfectly fine, as long as you're aware that many people will avoid you or refuse to roleplay with you as a result. If that's acceptable for you, then play however you feel!
That said, having been directly involved with storyline events or storyline characters is a huge Mary Sue red flag. We're talking "The Japanese are bombing Pearl Harbor, Mr. President" levels of red flag. The only one who'd successfully fought the primals and worked directly with the scions is the "main character", that is, the Warrior of Light. Again, it's acceptable for you to roleplay as the WoL as long as you accept other roleplayers avoiding you.
I'm not even going to bother asking how one wins a fight with a Primal "diplomatically" unless it consists of defeating Titan at Monopoly or something.
Quote:Has great experience in most crafting classes thanks to sea life.See my point above about mastering abilities and the amount of time it takes. How does being at sea relate to him being good at these abilities? How has he had the time to adequately learn these abilities enough to be called "skilled"? What, specifically, is he skilled at? And again, how has he had the time to master these skills while also, apparently, being a skilled melee combatant, marksman, and magic user?
Quote:Can perform healing magic with the Mognificent Mogtome Bible.The internet has robbed me of my ability to distinguish satire so this honestly confuses me. What form of healing magic? Is this tied into him being an arcanist? Why is this worth mentioning? How does this tie into his character?
Quote:Gets along with 4 beast tribes Sahagin, Kobold, Amaljaa, Moogles.Okay, this isn't all that unreasonable so long as you adequately explain how he managed to do this. Is he a skilled negotiator? A diplomat? Has he traded with the beast tribes for years, long enough for them to trust him with commerce? Moogles are invisible unless they choose to reveal themselves, so how did he manage to associate with them on a large scale?
Quote:Has an elemental affinity for Water and Fire.Elaborate. Simply telling me this does nothing to describe who your character is.
Quote:Has experienced near death thanks to the battle of Certeneau.How is this a "con"? This is just an experience. If I stub my toe on a coffee table, is that somehow a detriment to my personality?
Quote:Due to his dying state when he was teleported by Master Louisoix he relived the last painful moments over and over again til meeting the dark crystal Zodiark.BZZZZZT
See my above point about tying your character into story events.
Quote:His limit break although powerful uses the powers of chaos.Your character should be completely separated from in-game mechanics.
Quote:Hates the cold due to his trauma.Trauma? Trauma where? From what? Is this actual, legitimate psychological trauma, the kind that has a lasting effect on someone's psyche and damages them on a consistent basis, or the five minute disposable "oh no I accidentally rear-ended someone on the freeway" brand of trauma?
Quote:An unhealthy addiction to green tea needs a cup every two days or withdrawal symptoms show up.Is this an actual addiction with observable, negative effects on him? Where does it come from? Have his relationships been affected by his addiction?
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Okay, so here are some notes for you to use.
First things first: listing your character in terms of "pros" and "cons" isn't an unworkable method but is generally very inflexible and very poor at defining who your character is. When you're writing your character, simply thinking "how is he good" and "how is he bad" is an incredibly narrow mindset when it comes to, essentially, defining another person.
Your character is defined by his character; that is, the central element is his personality. How does he react to certain things? How does he handle failure? What makes him laugh? What makes him angry? Is he talkative? Silent? What kind of person is he? Is he stoic? Serious? Lighthearted? Cocky? How are these elements tied into his past? Was he inspired to be one way or another? Does he refuse to act a certain way? Why?
In addition, character "flaws" need to be actual flaws. They need to be things that will actually damage him or impede his progress in overcoming obstacles, and should present a meaningful challenge to himself and his relationships with others. If he's prideful, then demonstrate or think of an occasion where his pride lead to him failing. Perhaps he gambled everything on an investment and refused to drop out, leading to him being in debt or losing most of his money.
Tying into the above, things like "trauma" or "addiction" are not terms to be thrown around lightly unless they are clearly used as exaggeration or jest. How does his "trauma" affect him? Is he actually affected by it, or is it something used just to make the character look edgy and cool for surviving it? What implications does trauma have? Does he suffer from flashbacks or nightmares? How does this affect how he deals with other people? Similarly, "addiction". How has his addiction damaged himself or his businesses or his relationships with other people? If he's suffering from withdrawal, does it seriously affect him? How? Is this a major obstacle in who he is?
In the end, the lesson is this: a character is built through adversity. A character who is the hero who wins and succeeds all the time is just a boring self-insert power fantasy. It's the characters who struggle with themselves and with others, the characters who try their damndest yet still fail that compel people.
So, as you write your character, constantly ask yourself the five "W"s of narrative structure: who, what, where, when, and most importantly, why. Who is he? Who is important to him? Who does he hate? What does he do? What does he want to do? What got in his way? Where did he learn things? Where does he want to go? Where are his priorities? When did he learn his skills? When did parts of his past happen? When is he going to advance his ambitions? Why is he the person he is? Why does he want to do a certain thing or things? Why should other characters take him seriously?
I wish you luck.
