Confessions, eh?
I got terribly, thoroughly sucked into three goals for Heavensward: getting BRD to 50 (done), getting MNK to 50 (I'm at 49), and riding the wake with MNR until I made 60 (done) and made as much gil as I could. I've multiplied my fortune by a factor of seven since the expansion dropped, but I got sucked into the Red Scrip grind...
Why does it matter? Because it all sucked the RP right out of me. It's only in the last week that I've felt able to start breaking out of that grind, with the realization that poor Nathan has pretty much lived and breathed by 11pm/11am Eorzea time everyday (and if you are a max level miner, you know what that means...). I wanted that Red Scrip gear. I still want it.
In the interim, my main RP partner had a schedule change that's left us having trouble scheduling time, and Soliloquy has rather dissolved because I haven't taken up the slack to try to rebuild it / keep it going. I even missed the Celebration of the Builder. Me, who has NEVER missed one ever before, missed one. It doesn't sound like much, but those who know me might recognize that as a big symptom.
I've talked / passed by several folks with whom I've RPed a lot before and... well, the grind just called me back. It's only been this week that I realized that I don't NEED to keep up the pace anymore. Everything else I want from the game can be obtained at a casual pace, now (since I'm not planning to do Alexander anytime soon, nor do I really have any reason to get more gear for the single purpose of... running Alexander more)
So... I've slacked off, and I've felt stuck in that self-fulfilling prophecy of wondering if I can catch up, feeling intimidated by the effort I know is involved, and getting mired in the downward spiral it creates... and I'm the same person who's been able to walk into the QS any old time and pretty much RP with anyone, at the drop of a hat.
Of course, this week it's been trying to get the Moonfire Faire outfits for a number of alts, and even with the Battered Fish, that takes time. Having one of my parents in the hospital for a week, who was just released last Sunday, didn't help either.
So, yeah, my confession is that I've felt stuck in the mire and stupidly intimidated by the sheer effort I'll need to try to get back in good with everyone I used to do more with, and rebuild those bridges. But, the truth is there ain't no way to get started except by getting started, so I'm gonna try. Now, where can I find a good fire to light under the ol' arse...
And I don't even really know Edda to know whether I oughta be a fan or not, but I do try to keep an emergency, inflatable fainting couch should I get too close to Jancis
I got terribly, thoroughly sucked into three goals for Heavensward: getting BRD to 50 (done), getting MNK to 50 (I'm at 49), and riding the wake with MNR until I made 60 (done) and made as much gil as I could. I've multiplied my fortune by a factor of seven since the expansion dropped, but I got sucked into the Red Scrip grind...
Why does it matter? Because it all sucked the RP right out of me. It's only in the last week that I've felt able to start breaking out of that grind, with the realization that poor Nathan has pretty much lived and breathed by 11pm/11am Eorzea time everyday (and if you are a max level miner, you know what that means...). I wanted that Red Scrip gear. I still want it.
In the interim, my main RP partner had a schedule change that's left us having trouble scheduling time, and Soliloquy has rather dissolved because I haven't taken up the slack to try to rebuild it / keep it going. I even missed the Celebration of the Builder. Me, who has NEVER missed one ever before, missed one. It doesn't sound like much, but those who know me might recognize that as a big symptom.
I've talked / passed by several folks with whom I've RPed a lot before and... well, the grind just called me back. It's only been this week that I realized that I don't NEED to keep up the pace anymore. Everything else I want from the game can be obtained at a casual pace, now (since I'm not planning to do Alexander anytime soon, nor do I really have any reason to get more gear for the single purpose of... running Alexander more)
So... I've slacked off, and I've felt stuck in that self-fulfilling prophecy of wondering if I can catch up, feeling intimidated by the effort I know is involved, and getting mired in the downward spiral it creates... and I'm the same person who's been able to walk into the QS any old time and pretty much RP with anyone, at the drop of a hat.
Of course, this week it's been trying to get the Moonfire Faire outfits for a number of alts, and even with the Battered Fish, that takes time. Having one of my parents in the hospital for a week, who was just released last Sunday, didn't help either.
So, yeah, my confession is that I've felt stuck in the mire and stupidly intimidated by the sheer effort I'll need to try to get back in good with everyone I used to do more with, and rebuild those bridges. But, the truth is there ain't no way to get started except by getting started, so I'm gonna try. Now, where can I find a good fire to light under the ol' arse...
And I don't even really know Edda to know whether I oughta be a fan or not, but I do try to keep an emergency, inflatable fainting couch should I get too close to Jancis
"But in the laugh there was another voice. A clearer laugh, an ironic laugh. A laugh which laughs because it chooses not to weep."
![[Image: 3610850.jpg]](http://assets-cloud.enjin.com/users/1266293/pics/original/3610850.jpg)
