Welcome back Nara. I hope you find what you're looking for, as you remind me of a friend I had, and I certainly do feel your situation.
Here's my quick two cents on the matter:
I'm not sure if you still feel the way you felt when you wrote this post a long time ago, but I do believe this might be your first problem, and the number one thing you should work on to improve yourself and become more social.
Do not discriminate pre-planning, scheduling, and OOC conversation. It is very important for roleplay, because friends will not read each others' minds and know when to log in, when one's free to RP, or when one's busy with raid, crafting, and the such.
Also please please please check this thread back. I'm not sure if you're doing it, or if you're waiting for all these lovely players who have reached out to you to contact you in-game. There is a chance they won't, if you don't respond back here. And the fact that you've already said you're afraid to check the thread worries me. In order to have others care for you, you must show the same care by checking out their responses, and reply accordingly. You have left many threads (that you started) unanswered in the past. Maybe it's because of the negativity, and I understand that can be scary... but at the same time, there can't be "yes" if there is "no". You can't just get one side of things, you know?
So the tl;dr of this is: read the answers to your threads, answer to people (either on the thread or via PMs) and do not discriminate pre-planning and scheduling. OOC communication is the only true way to social success.
I hope that you won't take these words as mean or negative or to come from someone who doesn't understand, because I do understand your feelings. I have been RPing in XIV since 2013, and I still have no people that I RP/talk with on a daily basis who did not come from my older RP group on XI. I don't really have any "XIV-only" friends yet. So I know the feeling. The only difference between you and me is that this does not hurt me as much as it seems to be hurting you (in fact, I'm not really doing anything to improve my social situation, because right now I have other priorities and I feel fine with the old friends I have).
Making friends is a matter of opening to others but also reaching out to others, and the latter cannot be done if you don't check posts and don't sit down to pre-plan or schedule time to spend with others OOC. Break these big two barriers of yours and you'll go great strides towards being a much more social person.
Here's my quick two cents on the matter:
(03-30-2015, 02:40 AM)Narato Wrote: I wish to thank everyone for responding. Â However I will no longer be checking back on this post because I wish for truly random encounters in roleplay. Â This is starting to feel like everybody on this server wants to schedule roleplay rather than it just being random.
I do apologize but this is how I feel. Â Balmung feels like I need to file paperwork to do anything and I am finding that no one really does any actual random RP outside of their circles or cliques/friends.
I'm not trying to be rude or disrespectful but I just can't handle this. Â I want random RP not try to hook up with someone via request. Â My apologies for saying this. Â I know what this site is for and finally find myself understanding now. Â I've been doing this the wrong way.
If anyone ever sees Nara'to walking around feel free to bump into him randomly. Â I won't be scheduling play dates, I'll be seeking random RP.
I'm not sure if you still feel the way you felt when you wrote this post a long time ago, but I do believe this might be your first problem, and the number one thing you should work on to improve yourself and become more social.
Do not discriminate pre-planning, scheduling, and OOC conversation. It is very important for roleplay, because friends will not read each others' minds and know when to log in, when one's free to RP, or when one's busy with raid, crafting, and the such.
Also please please please check this thread back. I'm not sure if you're doing it, or if you're waiting for all these lovely players who have reached out to you to contact you in-game. There is a chance they won't, if you don't respond back here. And the fact that you've already said you're afraid to check the thread worries me. In order to have others care for you, you must show the same care by checking out their responses, and reply accordingly. You have left many threads (that you started) unanswered in the past. Maybe it's because of the negativity, and I understand that can be scary... but at the same time, there can't be "yes" if there is "no". You can't just get one side of things, you know?
So the tl;dr of this is: read the answers to your threads, answer to people (either on the thread or via PMs) and do not discriminate pre-planning and scheduling. OOC communication is the only true way to social success.
I hope that you won't take these words as mean or negative or to come from someone who doesn't understand, because I do understand your feelings. I have been RPing in XIV since 2013, and I still have no people that I RP/talk with on a daily basis who did not come from my older RP group on XI. I don't really have any "XIV-only" friends yet. So I know the feeling. The only difference between you and me is that this does not hurt me as much as it seems to be hurting you (in fact, I'm not really doing anything to improve my social situation, because right now I have other priorities and I feel fine with the old friends I have).
Making friends is a matter of opening to others but also reaching out to others, and the latter cannot be done if you don't check posts and don't sit down to pre-plan or schedule time to spend with others OOC. Break these big two barriers of yours and you'll go great strides towards being a much more social person.
To be an interesting, intriguing, well-written character, there needs to be something to allow the audience to relate to them. That is what the problem is with who wants their character to be "perfect". Perfect characters will never be strong, and strong characters will never be perfect, because WE (those who read, who watch, who RP) are not perfect.
"What makes a strong character is how they deal with their flaws, their fears, their turmoils, their troubles that get in the way. That's what makes them relatable." -- N.C.
"What makes a strong character is how they deal with their flaws, their fears, their turmoils, their troubles that get in the way. That's what makes them relatable." -- N.C.
