Once outside the combined warmth of the morning sun and sickly sweet smell of nearby flowers had the opposite effect on her. Coatleque stumbled to the edge of the porch and grabbed hold of an iron rail nearby. Her head spun and she leaned over it into the bushes. She pulled a handkerchief from her purse quickly to wipe her face when finished and stood there heaving pained breaths doing all she could not to break down and sob.
Jameson exited the veranda as well as she was recovering. His heels clicked on the stone patio signaling a limp behind her as he stepped closer. She did not look back, hands gripping the railing through the kerchief. His voice sounded chastening to her. "That was poorly done."
"What do you care?", she spat.
The man pursed his lips as the sound of the door closing signaled that someone else had joined them. "You think that I do not?"
"I do not know what to think." Her responses were almost immediate now.
His voice turned cold then. "What can you provide for me, Coatleque? I asked you before. Has that changed?" She shivered slightly and shook her head slowly, but not as an answer. She still did not look back to him.
"I gave you my very life. Was that not enough?"
Sharper now, he spoke. That ire she was so familiar with finally returning. "You do not know what I gave. What I worked for. What I hoped for. I asked you where you saw yourself when the next era dawned, and do you remember your answer?"
"By your side. Or so I had hoped."
He snapped, "That is not what you said. You said 'I do not know. I do not even know how I got here.'"
Her grip tightened as she thought back. Were those her words? She could no longer recall, but...
"I never said... that."
Jameson was not pleased, and his expression showed that for anyone watching. The familiar scrawl of a quill rose in the background. His voice lowered. "I confided in you. My... estate's affairs, the losses I'd taken." He hissed. "My past."
Coatleque blinked and flexed her grip desperately to keep her voice from wavering. "And I continued to stand by your side, James. Did you forget that?!"
He drew himself up, though she still would not look at him. "I did not. Have not. I am very grateful for your... companionship." His voice lowered to a whisper. "And your love." There was a pause before he resumed his coldness. "But what can you give me now, Coatleque?"
She listened, thought, then heaved dejectedly. It did not matter what she could or would do. She had no thing material to offer, and her companionship would never be enough. He was too driven a man, and what little influence she once had over him had faded in her eyes. "What does it matter what I can give you? Your plans are already made."
Jameson shrugged. "Her father has been a stout ally. He is trusting that I will once more find my way. And I shall. There are many opportunities here, and in Coerthas." And so it was, back to business as always. As he droned on about his plans she barely listened, only interjecting "You think I doubted you?" quietly from the side.
"Ishgard has opened its gates for the first time in a hundred years." He stepped closer to her, spoke quieter so only they two would hear. "And I still..." He paused at her comment. "No. You only doubted yourself. Your place in the world. By my side. In Ul'dah. All of it."
Her expression fell, her anger rising once more. "If I doubted so much then why did I spend the past moon hunting for you?" At that point the sound of the quill grew louder as his new 'assistant' - more like scribe, Coatleque thought - stepped closer for better listening.
"I do not know. You... did not know where to look." The coldness in his voice subsided even if momentarily. "I am glad for that. You would have seen me... brought low."
She finally righted herself then and dared to glance over her shoulder towards him. "What were you going to say? A moment ago. You were about to say something." He was not quite looking at her though, gazing just past her into the gardens. He stiffened. "Nothing. The past is the past." His chin lifted as if his mind were made up on that matter. "Edda is the prize."
"Liar." she muttered quietly. His stare would have bored a hole into the very back of her skull. A moment passed in silence before he forcibly changed his stance. His voice softened noticeably. "Can I still... call you friend, Coatleque?"
The knot in her stomach rose again. The gall of this man! Having such news broken to her and in this way, yet now he expected her to simply continue as if the time they spent together never occurred!? Her fists clenched into balls by her sides and she looked away from him again. "As of this morning, I would prefer you call me nothing." She nearly hissed through a deepening frown. "Enjoy your prize," she spat.
Jameson looked down and nodded. "For now then. It was... good to see you nonetheless." He paused briefly before turning on his heel and limping back towards the great manse, his assistant following. It was not until the door closed that Coatleque finally had strength to stagger onward. She followed the path around the garden to re-enter the manse from another direction - seeking a round-about way back to her quarters so as not to see or be seen by anyone.
Once there she nearly tore the dress off, leaving it on the bed. She threw on her uniform once more and collected her things, eager to be away from there. A retainer thankfully found her soon after and led her through the halls to the front entrance. She took one last brief glimpse of the main all and to her chagrin, swore she saw Edda quietly laughing at her from the top of the bannister some distance away. With one final glare she stormed out.
Jameson exited the veranda as well as she was recovering. His heels clicked on the stone patio signaling a limp behind her as he stepped closer. She did not look back, hands gripping the railing through the kerchief. His voice sounded chastening to her. "That was poorly done."
"What do you care?", she spat.
The man pursed his lips as the sound of the door closing signaled that someone else had joined them. "You think that I do not?"
"I do not know what to think." Her responses were almost immediate now.
His voice turned cold then. "What can you provide for me, Coatleque? I asked you before. Has that changed?" She shivered slightly and shook her head slowly, but not as an answer. She still did not look back to him.
"I gave you my very life. Was that not enough?"
Sharper now, he spoke. That ire she was so familiar with finally returning. "You do not know what I gave. What I worked for. What I hoped for. I asked you where you saw yourself when the next era dawned, and do you remember your answer?"
"By your side. Or so I had hoped."
He snapped, "That is not what you said. You said 'I do not know. I do not even know how I got here.'"
Her grip tightened as she thought back. Were those her words? She could no longer recall, but...
"I never said... that."
Jameson was not pleased, and his expression showed that for anyone watching. The familiar scrawl of a quill rose in the background. His voice lowered. "I confided in you. My... estate's affairs, the losses I'd taken." He hissed. "My past."
Coatleque blinked and flexed her grip desperately to keep her voice from wavering. "And I continued to stand by your side, James. Did you forget that?!"
He drew himself up, though she still would not look at him. "I did not. Have not. I am very grateful for your... companionship." His voice lowered to a whisper. "And your love." There was a pause before he resumed his coldness. "But what can you give me now, Coatleque?"
She listened, thought, then heaved dejectedly. It did not matter what she could or would do. She had no thing material to offer, and her companionship would never be enough. He was too driven a man, and what little influence she once had over him had faded in her eyes. "What does it matter what I can give you? Your plans are already made."
Jameson shrugged. "Her father has been a stout ally. He is trusting that I will once more find my way. And I shall. There are many opportunities here, and in Coerthas." And so it was, back to business as always. As he droned on about his plans she barely listened, only interjecting "You think I doubted you?" quietly from the side.
"Ishgard has opened its gates for the first time in a hundred years." He stepped closer to her, spoke quieter so only they two would hear. "And I still..." He paused at her comment. "No. You only doubted yourself. Your place in the world. By my side. In Ul'dah. All of it."
Her expression fell, her anger rising once more. "If I doubted so much then why did I spend the past moon hunting for you?" At that point the sound of the quill grew louder as his new 'assistant' - more like scribe, Coatleque thought - stepped closer for better listening.
"I do not know. You... did not know where to look." The coldness in his voice subsided even if momentarily. "I am glad for that. You would have seen me... brought low."
She finally righted herself then and dared to glance over her shoulder towards him. "What were you going to say? A moment ago. You were about to say something." He was not quite looking at her though, gazing just past her into the gardens. He stiffened. "Nothing. The past is the past." His chin lifted as if his mind were made up on that matter. "Edda is the prize."
"Liar." she muttered quietly. His stare would have bored a hole into the very back of her skull. A moment passed in silence before he forcibly changed his stance. His voice softened noticeably. "Can I still... call you friend, Coatleque?"
The knot in her stomach rose again. The gall of this man! Having such news broken to her and in this way, yet now he expected her to simply continue as if the time they spent together never occurred!? Her fists clenched into balls by her sides and she looked away from him again. "As of this morning, I would prefer you call me nothing." She nearly hissed through a deepening frown. "Enjoy your prize," she spat.
Jameson looked down and nodded. "For now then. It was... good to see you nonetheless." He paused briefly before turning on his heel and limping back towards the great manse, his assistant following. It was not until the door closed that Coatleque finally had strength to stagger onward. She followed the path around the garden to re-enter the manse from another direction - seeking a round-about way back to her quarters so as not to see or be seen by anyone.
Once there she nearly tore the dress off, leaving it on the bed. She threw on her uniform once more and collected her things, eager to be away from there. A retainer thankfully found her soon after and led her through the halls to the front entrance. She took one last brief glimpse of the main all and to her chagrin, swore she saw Edda quietly laughing at her from the top of the bannister some distance away. With one final glare she stormed out.
