You know the worst part of a stake out alone is?  Other than the mind numbing boredom, it’s the having to pee and not being able too.  Started about thirty minutes ago and it’s only getting worse.  I just know the second I step away to take care of business, that’s when he’ll show too.  It’s like an unwritten law of nature or somethin’.
Maybe if I just pretend I’m going too?  Like take a few steps away and jump back around the corner just after I turn it?  Nah, just having planned it out means it won’t work.  Damn it I really gotta …. Oh, hello there.
I’ll be damn, course now I get to do this still having to go but… no time like the present.  The lalafell is the one I want, the other one is just muscle, a lot of it at that.  Why do lala’s and roes go together like whiskey and cigars?  Has to be some kind of survival protective instinct, or inbred size irony.
They pass right by my alley on the dusty back street of Ul’Dah.  Ugly part of town, impoverished, but still enough folks about they don’t notice.  We walk a ways until we come to his door.  As the lala starts to unlock it and push the door open I decide it’s time to make an impression.  See, I’ve dealt with this little twit before and he owned me, several times, but even with that, he’s never one to give in easily to requests.  Think of him as the hardest working lazy guy you’ve ever met.  So because of this, intimidation and taking away his highest ranked Triad card was a must.  That meant, big guy had to go.
The door swung open, I jumped up and wrapped my arms about his thick neck and threw all my weight behind me at the same time.  Leverage is everything. He fell back, I rolled on my back continuing and thrust my feet into his backside and kicked.  I’m not as big as he is and I don’t have the mass, but I’m stronger than I look.  Between that and momentum, big guy went flying to the other side of the street, several feet of it on his head like a top, which was impressive as hell really, and came crashing to the stonework when the guttering stopped him.
Flipping back up to my feet to face a slack jawed lalafell that was just now gathering his wits and turning to scramble in the open door and slam the very solid thing in my face.  I stepped forward and got my gauntleted forearm in the door just as it closed on it, the force of the small guy on the other side constant.  I kicked the door, causing it and him to be flung inward, stepped in and kicked it closed behind me and flipped the large lock from the inside.  “Howdy there, Trento, I need a favor from you.â€
Trendo, his black hair frazzled and got to his feet. Â He was fairly standard for his kind, short, obviously, and had a lip weasel he was very proud of and waxed until it shone. Â He wore fairly basic tunic and pants of desert colors and a man purse satchel thing across his chest that rested at his stubby legs. Â The only thing off putting, was how deep his voice was. Â It was like if a bear could talk, all bass and rumbles. Â It always made anything he said sound like it had authority or confidence, even when he clearly had neither.
“Yeah well, Sephr, you got a funny way of asking for things,†he grumped as he dusted himself off and glared up at me with his beady little black eyes.  “That guy didn’t come cheap you know, and you probably busted him.â€
“Probably, but next time you hire someone, make sure their neck ain’t so thick they can’t look behind them to see you’re bein’ tailed.  Hell, I did you a favor, I’ll likely just have to add it to the list of them.† I stepped inside the small but cluttered room. Shelves lined the walls with foot stools before each of them.  Manifests, scrolls, maps, and more.  Information of use to someone sooner or later.  Trendo was one of a few people I knew I could count on to get it for me when I needed it, even if I nearly had to wring it out of his scrawny little neck.
He scoffed, trying to recover the high ground, figuratively of course, and sat down at his desk.  “If I got to find a new one, I’m taking it out of your time and charging you.  I got a lot of things to do, I can’t even promise I’ll be able to do what you want with in the next, week or more.  If that!†Â
“Uh huh.  You’ll get it to me with in the next two days or there’ll be hell to pay, you owe me, not the other way around, if you’ll remember.† He opened his mouth but I kept talking, “I got a manifest, found at in a qiqirn camp and since the little buggers ain’t one for keeping track of their usual salvaged garbage, I figure someone is trading with them, and I need to know who.† I pulled out a the list I’d found during an outing looking for an item and instead, found a brand new qiqirn camp sprung up in its place. Â
Taking the papers with an angry swipe he looked them over as I quietly stood crossing my arms, “I don’t know, Sephr.  Lotta people trade with beast tribes on the downlow and a lot of this stuff is pretty standard wares.  Could take weeks, like I said, you’re not the only person that comes to me you know.  I got dozens of other things I’m looking into right now, all of them ahead of you and more important.  Yeah… come back in a few weeks, I’ll have it for you.â€
“No, two days… now weeks, not a week, not three days, not two and one fourth of a day.  Two.  Bloody. Days.† He scowled up at me and I grinned slightly down at him, “Tell you what, I’ll sweeten the pot.  You do this in two days, and I know of a cat girl, ready and willing to do unspeakable things, right here in this office for you for as long as you want.  She’ll be all yours, I know how much you like the ones with the fluffy tails.† There was an audible gulp and his chubby little hands started to wring together.  Little pervert.  “But only, if I get what I need when I come back in exactly two days.â€
“Unspeakable… you say?â€
“Unspeakable.â€
“Fine… FINE!  Two days and you better have her in the wings after I find it.  It won’t be easy you know!  My time is worth something too!†Â
“Yes, yes, you’re a busy little delinquent.  Two days, see you then,†I spoke over my shoulder as I unlatched the door and pulled it over.  A wall of angry muscled chest hair right at eye level.  “No hard feelings big guy.† I patted him on the chest and found myself lifted into the air, feet a few inches from the ground and my coat bunched up in a massive fist. “Gurk!â€
From behind me the low bass of, “Put him down and get in here before I fire your ass, I got work for you!â€
Maybe if I just pretend I’m going too?  Like take a few steps away and jump back around the corner just after I turn it?  Nah, just having planned it out means it won’t work.  Damn it I really gotta …. Oh, hello there.
I’ll be damn, course now I get to do this still having to go but… no time like the present.  The lalafell is the one I want, the other one is just muscle, a lot of it at that.  Why do lala’s and roes go together like whiskey and cigars?  Has to be some kind of survival protective instinct, or inbred size irony.
They pass right by my alley on the dusty back street of Ul’Dah.  Ugly part of town, impoverished, but still enough folks about they don’t notice.  We walk a ways until we come to his door.  As the lala starts to unlock it and push the door open I decide it’s time to make an impression.  See, I’ve dealt with this little twit before and he owned me, several times, but even with that, he’s never one to give in easily to requests.  Think of him as the hardest working lazy guy you’ve ever met.  So because of this, intimidation and taking away his highest ranked Triad card was a must.  That meant, big guy had to go.
The door swung open, I jumped up and wrapped my arms about his thick neck and threw all my weight behind me at the same time.  Leverage is everything. He fell back, I rolled on my back continuing and thrust my feet into his backside and kicked.  I’m not as big as he is and I don’t have the mass, but I’m stronger than I look.  Between that and momentum, big guy went flying to the other side of the street, several feet of it on his head like a top, which was impressive as hell really, and came crashing to the stonework when the guttering stopped him.
Flipping back up to my feet to face a slack jawed lalafell that was just now gathering his wits and turning to scramble in the open door and slam the very solid thing in my face.  I stepped forward and got my gauntleted forearm in the door just as it closed on it, the force of the small guy on the other side constant.  I kicked the door, causing it and him to be flung inward, stepped in and kicked it closed behind me and flipped the large lock from the inside.  “Howdy there, Trento, I need a favor from you.â€
Trendo, his black hair frazzled and got to his feet. Â He was fairly standard for his kind, short, obviously, and had a lip weasel he was very proud of and waxed until it shone. Â He wore fairly basic tunic and pants of desert colors and a man purse satchel thing across his chest that rested at his stubby legs. Â The only thing off putting, was how deep his voice was. Â It was like if a bear could talk, all bass and rumbles. Â It always made anything he said sound like it had authority or confidence, even when he clearly had neither.
“Yeah well, Sephr, you got a funny way of asking for things,†he grumped as he dusted himself off and glared up at me with his beady little black eyes.  “That guy didn’t come cheap you know, and you probably busted him.â€
“Probably, but next time you hire someone, make sure their neck ain’t so thick they can’t look behind them to see you’re bein’ tailed.  Hell, I did you a favor, I’ll likely just have to add it to the list of them.† I stepped inside the small but cluttered room. Shelves lined the walls with foot stools before each of them.  Manifests, scrolls, maps, and more.  Information of use to someone sooner or later.  Trendo was one of a few people I knew I could count on to get it for me when I needed it, even if I nearly had to wring it out of his scrawny little neck.
He scoffed, trying to recover the high ground, figuratively of course, and sat down at his desk.  “If I got to find a new one, I’m taking it out of your time and charging you.  I got a lot of things to do, I can’t even promise I’ll be able to do what you want with in the next, week or more.  If that!†Â
“Uh huh.  You’ll get it to me with in the next two days or there’ll be hell to pay, you owe me, not the other way around, if you’ll remember.† He opened his mouth but I kept talking, “I got a manifest, found at in a qiqirn camp and since the little buggers ain’t one for keeping track of their usual salvaged garbage, I figure someone is trading with them, and I need to know who.† I pulled out a the list I’d found during an outing looking for an item and instead, found a brand new qiqirn camp sprung up in its place. Â
Taking the papers with an angry swipe he looked them over as I quietly stood crossing my arms, “I don’t know, Sephr.  Lotta people trade with beast tribes on the downlow and a lot of this stuff is pretty standard wares.  Could take weeks, like I said, you’re not the only person that comes to me you know.  I got dozens of other things I’m looking into right now, all of them ahead of you and more important.  Yeah… come back in a few weeks, I’ll have it for you.â€
“No, two days… now weeks, not a week, not three days, not two and one fourth of a day.  Two.  Bloody. Days.† He scowled up at me and I grinned slightly down at him, “Tell you what, I’ll sweeten the pot.  You do this in two days, and I know of a cat girl, ready and willing to do unspeakable things, right here in this office for you for as long as you want.  She’ll be all yours, I know how much you like the ones with the fluffy tails.† There was an audible gulp and his chubby little hands started to wring together.  Little pervert.  “But only, if I get what I need when I come back in exactly two days.â€
“Unspeakable… you say?â€
“Unspeakable.â€
“Fine… FINE!  Two days and you better have her in the wings after I find it.  It won’t be easy you know!  My time is worth something too!†Â
“Yes, yes, you’re a busy little delinquent.  Two days, see you then,†I spoke over my shoulder as I unlatched the door and pulled it over.  A wall of angry muscled chest hair right at eye level.  “No hard feelings big guy.† I patted him on the chest and found myself lifted into the air, feet a few inches from the ground and my coat bunched up in a massive fist. “Gurk!â€
From behind me the low bass of, “Put him down and get in here before I fire your ass, I got work for you!â€
