The biggest "enemy" of busy people is time itself. Â We all play this game to have fun and decompress from spending the day in Real Life. Â Sometimes we log on to RP, other times we just want to PVE or craft, just have some time to ourselves to rest and recharge without having to put in a whole lot of social time. Â Most people have jobs or school or families that need them, so that means they have a limited number of hours to play in a given session. Â That oftentimes means that they book that time in advance to do things."
I'm going to do stuff for my Anima on Tuesday after the reset.
Oh, I have that RP event on X-day that I've been wanting to go to.
I'd like to get my X-craft to 60 so I can make XYZ-thing.
All of these take time, some more than others; roleplay takes up more time than anything else, since sessions can go from just one hour to omgwhatamistilldoinghere marathon sessions. Â It's also why people tend to be hesitant to "overbook" themselves, as it were. Â
I usually think of it in these terms: Â Prime Time RP hours are between 6pm Eastern and midnight. Â An 'average' RP session (for me, at least) is two hours, therefore, I never ask for or expect RP after 10pm, because that would go over my idealized 'operating hours' for roleplay.
If someone says no or says they're otherwise engaged, people shouldn't take that to mean "I never want to do anything with you, ever," which is half the problem. Â The other half of the problem is that people don't make an effort to connect, even when their answer is no.
How to combat the "Dreaded No's"
If you are the one being asked: Â Don't just say "no" when someone inquires, say something more along the lines of, "I'm currently occupied with XYZ at the moment, but if you'd like to RP <insert next available time-slot> then I'd be more than happy to!" Â
As someone who gets asked a lot, I keep a personal calendar of RP invitations I'm given and I schedule things accordingly.  I also make sure to keep appointments that I make.  Nothing puts people off more than cancellations, because they're basically blocking off some of that precious time commodity specifically for you. Â
Especially make it a point to reschedule if you know for sure you're going to miss a session.  Don't neglect to tell someone you aren't going to be around (even if you just leave a note by Moogle Mail, by PM, or word-of-mouth through friends) -- barring Real Life emergencies, of course.  Scheduling a session, then failing to show up without an explanation basically shows your potential partner that their time is not important to you, which makes them less inclined to be so generous with it later.
If you are the one asking: Â If the answer is "no" then ask for a different day/time to do the thing you want to do. Â "Oh, okay, if you're busy tonight, how about we do XYZ on <insert next available time-slot>?" Â
Have a plan. Â If you're the one asking, you should have something in mind for the scene. Â "Slice-of-life" let's sit around and idle-chat is all well and good, but it gets stale pretty quickly if that's all you ever have to offer. Â A plan doesn't have to be elaborate, it just has to be something different and engaging.
Don't get discouraged. Â Just because the answer is "no" today doesn't mean that it will be the same tomorrow. Â Even if the answer is no seven times in a row, there will come a time that the answer will be yes. Â
Diversify! Â If you find that the answer is no a lot within your present circle of friends, try branching out and going to events, meeting new people, and diversifying your circle some. Â
Time is a finite resource for everyone and we have to share that, respect it, and take care of it. Â Not just on our own end, but for everyone in our circle that we're involved with.
I'm going to do stuff for my Anima on Tuesday after the reset.
Oh, I have that RP event on X-day that I've been wanting to go to.
I'd like to get my X-craft to 60 so I can make XYZ-thing.
All of these take time, some more than others; roleplay takes up more time than anything else, since sessions can go from just one hour to omgwhatamistilldoinghere marathon sessions. Â It's also why people tend to be hesitant to "overbook" themselves, as it were. Â
I usually think of it in these terms: Â Prime Time RP hours are between 6pm Eastern and midnight. Â An 'average' RP session (for me, at least) is two hours, therefore, I never ask for or expect RP after 10pm, because that would go over my idealized 'operating hours' for roleplay.
If someone says no or says they're otherwise engaged, people shouldn't take that to mean "I never want to do anything with you, ever," which is half the problem. Â The other half of the problem is that people don't make an effort to connect, even when their answer is no.
How to combat the "Dreaded No's"
If you are the one being asked: Â Don't just say "no" when someone inquires, say something more along the lines of, "I'm currently occupied with XYZ at the moment, but if you'd like to RP <insert next available time-slot> then I'd be more than happy to!" Â
As someone who gets asked a lot, I keep a personal calendar of RP invitations I'm given and I schedule things accordingly.  I also make sure to keep appointments that I make.  Nothing puts people off more than cancellations, because they're basically blocking off some of that precious time commodity specifically for you. Â
Especially make it a point to reschedule if you know for sure you're going to miss a session.  Don't neglect to tell someone you aren't going to be around (even if you just leave a note by Moogle Mail, by PM, or word-of-mouth through friends) -- barring Real Life emergencies, of course.  Scheduling a session, then failing to show up without an explanation basically shows your potential partner that their time is not important to you, which makes them less inclined to be so generous with it later.
If you are the one asking: Â If the answer is "no" then ask for a different day/time to do the thing you want to do. Â "Oh, okay, if you're busy tonight, how about we do XYZ on <insert next available time-slot>?" Â
Have a plan. Â If you're the one asking, you should have something in mind for the scene. Â "Slice-of-life" let's sit around and idle-chat is all well and good, but it gets stale pretty quickly if that's all you ever have to offer. Â A plan doesn't have to be elaborate, it just has to be something different and engaging.
Don't get discouraged. Â Just because the answer is "no" today doesn't mean that it will be the same tomorrow. Â Even if the answer is no seven times in a row, there will come a time that the answer will be yes. Â
Diversify! Â If you find that the answer is no a lot within your present circle of friends, try branching out and going to events, meeting new people, and diversifying your circle some. Â
Time is a finite resource for everyone and we have to share that, respect it, and take care of it. Â Not just on our own end, but for everyone in our circle that we're involved with.
![[Image: the-chroniclers-2.jpg]](https://writerholic.files.wordpress.com/2016/09/the-chroniclers-2.jpg)
