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(12-18-2016, 07:25 PM)Faye Wrote: Because people want to RP the theme/atmosphere of the event and want to take part in it, want to support the event/hosts/community, and typically still want to keep the potential for new/unexpected interactions open, but also want to ensure they don't miss posts from the people they're RPing with and don't want to cause themselves any extra stress or pain. It's not a piss poor excuse, but a valid option for people who find large events difficult to stomach, which you will find there are a lot of in this community. Given that some of these people have very real problems (anxiety, reading comprehension problems, poor eyesight, migraines, difficulty focusing, overstimulation, etc.) often linked to medical issues and disabilities, I think it's pretty rude and downright offensive to demonize them when all they're trying to do is make the RP easier for themselves and/or their friends and just have a good time.
Hell, a lot of these people go to events, meet someone new, and then form a party with that new connection so they can RP without any strain. I won't say that no one in the history of XIV has gone to an event with a pre-established group and ignored everyone else there, but these people are a vast minority and not typical. Folks are not ignoring /say and /em out of spite and may not even be meaning to ignore them at all. They could be trying their best to read /say and /em, but tab to a different chat window to reply to their current RP and miss a post from a stranger. They could just not see the character walk up to them, if they are busy reading/typing in chat, or if their camera is not angled just the right way, if they went afk for a moment, or if the person doesn't actually target their character or only stands next to them for five seconds.
They're not supporting anyone but they're small group if you're just RPing with them at a public event, and it is extremely silly to say that they're trying to keep the potential of unexpected interactions when they're avoiding the primary channels that allow it. A lot of people have various health/anxiety issues when trying to publicly RP, and I really do feel for them, but what about the person who also has severe social anxiety and is trying their hardest to RP just to be brushed off (at a public event no less)? That's as rude as hell, as well. Then they have people demonizing them by telling them that it's their own fault that they were ignored.
There are a million reasons on why someone could have missed something in /s or /sm, but there is missing something, then there is ignoring it by using a private channel to get away from it. People can say that they don't mean to be ignoring /s or /em, but that is what they are doing by using private channels.
(12-18-2016, 07:26 PM)Kilieit Wrote: Please read the reasoning people have stated for why they "ignore" people (this word suggests intent, which is a false assumption) at big events. It was stated quite clearly and repeatedly, by multiple posters.
Why do people go to big events instead of staying home, and then RP privately? Simple: change of scenery. It provides a backdrop for something a little different. And as Faye described, it allows the culmination of OOC connections into IC ones (different from cold-call walkups!) that won't occur if you just stay in your FC room and pretend you're at a gala.
The "just get out there" advice was qualified every single time I read it in this thread with to make OOC connections, to attend smaller events, and so forth.
You're jumping to conclusions in your anger. Please re-read the thread and try to understand where we're coming from.
At the end of the day, NO ONE SPECIFIC PERSON IS OBLIGATED TO ROLEPLAY WITH ANY OTHER ONE SPECIFIC PERSON. There are people who aren't going to be wanting to meet new folks on any given day. That is their prerogative. Like I said in my post explaining that thoughts like this are maladaptive, I gave a few examples of why someone could be closed off from meeting new people - sick, tired, distracted, or anxious in their own right. Yes, even if they've shown up to a big event.
I don't think it's fair to call people stupid, say they aren't allowed to go into a certain area to RP (remember the Gala was an open-world event, not located in an FC premises...), or suggest they're being malicious because they aren't up for talking to you on that day or in that place.
Saying something multiple times doesn't magically make it okay. Simply saying "I didn't mean to ignore /s and /sm" doesn't magically mean they didn't do it.
If they're looking for a change of scenery or special backdrop, there are hundreds of places to go. If someone goes to a public event, they should be prepared to publicly RP with others, or accept that what they are doing is pretty messed up for those who came to a public event to try to make connections, and not try to defend their actions.
You are correct, no one is obligated to RP with anyone. That doesn't make them immune to criticism though, and if they're not in the mood to RP with strangers, they shouldn't go to an event where there will be a lot of strangers then try to defend their actions when someone finally says "wtf?".
I think its extremely unfair that people tell new people that they should be expected to be ignored at large public events, then say it was their own fault because they don't know anyone. Why do they need to set something up OOCly, or stick to smaller events to try to get RP? I never said that groups shouldn't be allowed at public events, but question why they are there if they're just gonna privately RP anyway.
(12-18-2016, 07:29 PM)Aya Wrote: If you cannot understand why people would move to a private chat channel during an event with immense chatscroll, I don't really know what to say. I wasn't at the event, but I have attended similar ones in the past, and am a veteran of some very high-chat-scroll evenings at the Quick Sand. I do not join private chats at these events (unless they are explicitly preferred by the organizers to keep public chat down, which I have seen before), but I completely understand why people would: the chat scroll is the sort of thing that cannot only detract from your enjoyment, but can be downright headache causing. In the end people attend public events for the same reason that they attend any event: to have fun. Whether or not that means being terribly outgoing, social, and friendly really depends on the individual and the circumstances.Â
If people want to slip into private chat in order to be able to take a break from trying to scan the scroll, by all means they should not feel bad about doing so. Its so easy to miss things during these events (not to mention how easy it is for characters to actually fail to load, or become unloaded even when targeted). You simply cannot rely on either public chat, or visual recognition to actually get someone's attention. Whispers are your friend.
I try to go out of my way to meet people I haven't before, and to try to involve those who seem to be off on their own. That's just part of what I try to do as a role-player, and as a member of the community. But, not everyone is the same way. Some are shy, some are tired, some aren't feeling very social. They're not under any obligation, and if you approach them with a presumption that they owe you a connection, you're both being unfair and setting yourself up for disappointment.
The only real reliable ways to meet people and make friends is to both energetically put yourself out there, and to be persistent. This isn't fair. Life isn't fair. Its hard, and its hard to make friends in an on-line community just as it is in reality. Some people have an easier time with it, some have a harder time with it, and that unfortunately is the way it is. We can screw up our eyes, and ball up our fists, and cry to the high-heavens about the unfairness of it all, but it will not change.
If someone wants a break from the chat scroll at a public event, they can slip to the side and away from the main floor. Going to a private channel, then staying in the main area, is messed up. There is no justification for ignoring /s and /em when at a public event.
This community is insular enough (a reputation that many of you don't seem to realize is there), ignoring people at public events in favor of RPing privately is just gonna make it worse.