(05-05-2014, 11:31 AM)Rurutani Wrote: Hi...I am still pretty new to rp in an MMO and while I have done a few rp scenes, I do a bulk of it here on the site in the threads. But....lately I feel like I don't really understand my own character. Like no matter how much I know his backstory and where he is kind of going, I don't get him. I feel like there's some kind of disconnect and it makes playing him IC....wooden? Not interesting? I don't know. Because of this coupled with other issues for me (shyness, etc.) I feel like every small rp scene is awkward and probably not very interesting for others.I can totally understand. I went through much the same with my original character, Silke. I loved her concept, her backstory, the personality I gave her. Everything I had imagined for her made me excited to play XIV (because, at the time, I was very much against this game but all my friend were coming here), and I just couldn't wait to RP her. But when it came time to RP her... I hated her. Getting into character for her was like having needles shoved under my fingernails and then being told to type.
I don't know...there are days when I feel like re-rolling and/or drinking a fantasia potion and moving on, but I like Ruru. But there are times when IC I dislike him.
And that feeling sucks.
Any thoughts?
In November, after a month of grimacing every time I clicked on Silke to log her in, I rolled Kara. I went into the character creator with no existing concept or design; I simply played with the creator until I made a character I liked the look of. Got some levels under her belt, and then went into a 100% blank slate RP with one of my best friends. I had no backstory, no nothing. The character that Kara is today is the result of keeping and discarding (mostly discarding) ideas that had popped up during that RP session. I will not say that Kara is the best character I've come up with, but she's in the top five and I enjoy playing her.
Silke sat on my character login screen until March, when I finally deleted her. I was only logging her in for holiday/event stuff so that I could have armor/item rewards it if I ever decided to play her again, but by March I was certain that it'd never happen. And I realized when I started liquidating her inventory that, despite how much I had really wanted to play her and how excited I was about her initially, I wasn't even flinching or second-guessing the gear and excess crafting materials I was vendoring off or the gil and materia I was passing to my husband's character to pass on to Kara. Silke was just simply a character I was never meant to play.
Sometimes a character is just missing something, and you can eventually find that that thing through various methods. Sometimes it's just a matter of needing to take a break from the character and when you come back, everything is fine again. But sometimes... you just need to admit that while the idea was nice, it just wasn't going to work out.
So, my suggestion would be to roll an alt and play that for a bit. Maybe in the process you'll get lucky and realize what the problem is with your current main. Maybe you'll come up with a totally new concept for a character. But whatever happens, as long as you rediscover/find a character you're happy with, you're doing what you should be doing. Nothing saps your creativity and enthusiasm more than a character you just can't stand.
