The twenty-fifth  sun of the Third Umbral Moon
Dear Diary,
I’m not sure how to explain this one. In short time I’ve managed to upset two pregnant women, and turn a whole clan of keepers against me. The shining grace in this entry is Rivienne’s tale, it’s been some time since I told you of her plan for her legacy. But… to the beginning.
Avalyn, you remember her don’t you? I’ve been searching for an ex-lover of hers, but it’s been more difficult than I’d hoped. So, I found her again, glimpsing as a book of charcoal drawings she herself had done. She’s quite talented, and I was able to see a few faces she knew, including the one of the man who gave her child. But he wasn’t the one I was looking for, and to be honest, she’d very nearly ended my search. Avalyn had spoken to an old friend I think, someone who knew Corbec and told her of his despair and how without her he has become a recluse, or gone mad. I’m not sure, if they really should have been together or not, for the man seems unwilling to rectify this distance. I still wish to see it through if I can, I don’t like not finding someone, but such weakness in a man, it inspires curiosity and disappointment. So we focused on Avalyn, and this is where my first mistake began.
My father taught me a great deal of ways to ‘handle’ people. When you’re but a boy, some prefer manners, others chivalry, and even more find confident, flirtatious young men charming. But I was but a boy then, and my antics were endearing to women. Taunting Avalyn, though I’d like to believe I wasn’t rude about it, had upset her when she’d turned too red and I’d revealed I was simply gauging her limit on proximity. She took to insult, and got up to leave. I knew then that I really didn’t remember how to handle people, or perhaps my father’s ways had been incorrect. Maybe I didn’t mature enough, but it’s all I knew.
Perhaps, I will never do my old friends justice.
I followed her, wholly apologetic and trying to explain myself. I meant no harm, but that didn’t mean it wasn’t wrong I suppose. I’m trying to write this from the view of the outsider, but… I don’t understand why my actions had such effect over her.
She forgave me, to my relief and we walked, farther and farther out of Gridania and to a cave where she said she spent much of her youth. She told me of her mother, of not having a father and how she had ended up where she was. I’m not sure meeting a father is always good, if you think of mine, and hers refused to even acknowledge her and her mother, apparently he had a real family. I attempted to simply listen and ask here and there, understanding a little more how she had fallen for the first man she did, and was now with his child. He bit her here apparently, he liked to bite her.
I think her child might be void-touched as well. But, as of right now it was no concern of mine. Avalyn wants a man in her life, but she can do better than me. I have never been in one place for long, like many, and it’s clear my understanding of humanity is limited. Still, I offered her my arm and returned her to the inn, where a Mi’qote claiming to be a bodyguard addressed her. She spoke to him,so they knew one another, and despite my warning not to keep her up late, he ignored me. Looking back, I wonder if I have any tact with Mi’qote.
A day or two later I met Rivienne again, surprisingly enough in The Roost just as I had with Avalyn. I did not think I would be frequenting this forest. She wanted to speak to me, according to a letter she had sent, but upon seeing her I began to state that it was strange to see her without Thaarus, ‘a matching pair’ as of late, when the man showed up. They were quickly upon one another, with sweet nothings and affection. It made me happy to see her, but I felt like I couldn’t speak to Rivienne as I once had. We spoke for a bit, the three of us, of what I can’t recall.
Eudalie arrived, I greeted her warmly, just as a drunken man strode forward and spilled his drink onto Rivienne’s lap purposely. Needless to say she and Thaarus were furious in tandem. It didn’t take long to make the man back down, but I was thoroughly amused. More so than I should have been, of course Thaarus and Rivienne took to my comment of disrobing and washing the garment together and alone without pleasure. I wonder, am I relying on this persona too much?
While they cooed over one another I spoke to Eudalie until I heard a man speak of Odin, and the armor he had obtained from him was dropped with a mender. So of course, I dragged Eudalie over and started speaking to the Mi’qote whom I called ‘Black Cat’. He didn’t like company, but it didn’t dissuade me and soon I had the entire entourage around him, making him more uncomfortable as I inquired further. A man who slayed Odin, caught my interest of course. I like strangers, so I spoke to him of more and soon we all handled the introductions. Eudalie though, is worth note.
Flustered by her rudeness, for not introducing herself sooner she bowed so hard and quick she hit her head upon the table. It was thoroughly amusing, though… she damaged the new hat of mine I had slipped upon her head! Ah but, Thaarus is a tailor. She didn’t seem to notice her own pain and just continued to despair as she realized she had also wounded my hat. Eudalie never ceases to amaze me with her purity and sweetness. Ah, but the Black Cat Lathu’a left, pardoning himself for another journey. Thaarus who’d grown weary headed for rest. So Rivienne took the stage.
She told me of her family in Ishgard, how they had once been a family of nobility and how her brothers had chosen to keep it from her to keep her safe. She had disguised herself, sought them, and in the middle of Dravanian attack found  one.
Marceloix, if I remember the name, had died some time ago and was the brother they all sought to belike. Louix, she found him and tried to protect him the field. He recognized her despite her change in appearance and saved her instead. He smiled and died listening to Rivienne singing their mother’s lullaby. Lanceloix had left some time ago and she did not know where he was. Despite all this, and her desire for her own bloody legacy, her brother died loved and not alone, and instead of sinking into despair she found Thaarus and now seemed happier than ever. I was grateful to the twelve for this turn of fate, and I assured her that she would be well. I’m not sure if my words really did much for her, but I’m glad she is no longer seeking a bloody end. Still, it made me wonder. We parted ways then, and I choseto follow a Mi’qote who seemed troubled.
[sup]This entry is lengthy, but perhaps it is the greatest sign of my growth thus far. Or perhaps I just listen too frequently.[/sup]
I approached her at the Lavender Beds, we spoke of overcoming one another’s senses, I tried to push her into the water and cast my magic to prevent myself from falling in as I stumbled. My hands trembled and the ice floor soon shattered. I am getting better, even without Avalt, but it is taking time. As long as I don’t have another outburst.
Anyway, despite my better instincts diary I followed her to her home to meet her clan. I used my usual demeanor, not my charming self, but the one who seems flirtatious, keeping people at bay while being inviting. Their home was grand, but I wondered how a Keeper clan could happily live so close to civilization and allow guests within. Ah but this is where things became deranged. They asked me to remove my weapons and I did, lots of them. They wanted me to jump and I taunted to take my clothes off. The guard kit was not impressed. She called me pasty and someone informed me that I was a ginger, so I joked that I had no soul. Eventually, I satisfied them that I had no weapons. A lie.
I met a few of them, a dark skinned man named Ken introduced himself at the door, but the others were less than inviting. I didn’t mind. I found out a short time later why. Some attack had occurred and it made me wonder why Rhoe would invite me in under such circumstances. I had no ill intent but how were they to know? After a brief tour we ran into a Mi’qote being rude and bratty. At first I tried to confront her with reason, but she pissed me off and I called her a brat. Things went bad from there. Her husband arrived, and though I apologized, not out of fear but annoyance things did not get better.
A screaming Mi’qote was being tended to by the group and I wondered why I was here, but curiosity bade me to stay. One room after another I infuriated a new member of this clan. I tried not to, I fell into a habit my father had taught me once again. I tried to be quiet, simple, insignificant. I heard one inquire as to why I had been acting like I mattered. I was only trying to get an answer for Rhoe, not intervene. The husband Hyur of the onion mi’qote didn’t take to me, despite confessing that I apologized. I didn’t need to be liked, but I needed to be tolerated if I wanted to see the end of this story. So I did what I could, apologized here and there, became a silent little apologetic thing. It disgusted me to do so.
Though I wanted to learn about a clan I have to say, I hope they are not all like this. Those I’ve met, while weary of outsiders had more control. But I did want to learn. They tolerated me when they should have kicked me out. Their mannerisms were garish, and I realized what was happening a short time later. They were not individuals, and when I speak to people, including the pissed off onion mi’qote I consider them as individuals in what they do. But this was a family, and one who did not know how to handle my presence. They wanted me gone, but refused to say it outright at first. I tried to speak to another Mi’qote, Cemi I think her name was.
Honestly, she seems kind but the girl doesn’t look like she had been beyond the front porch despite her claims. Oh yes, before I forget they all repeat themselves. Atticus Buffalobane, told me not to upset people more times than I can count. My ignorance is not abstinence from my mistake, but I agreed more times than I can count. I don’t think they are used to the answers of outsiders.
I was warned so many times despite my having switched to what I assumed was a less intimidating mode, that it became tiring and well tedious.
These are not complains diary, these are observations, for honestly, they intrigued me above all else. I caught whispers of their conversation, a whisper of a man named Roen. I’d thought a Mi’qote was giving birth but it seems it was some tragedy going on.
Oh yes, they are so protective I could not even tend to a wounded companion of theirs. She was alright regardless of course. I have never seen this much of a clan, I tried to remain an outsider to watch them after my mistakes but they pained themselves to keep an eye on me. I think they really thought I believed myself important, but there is a reason I let others tell me of themselves and not the other way around. I don’t make myself important. It’s too attention grabbing.
I have not been exiled, and the Mi’qote vice matron had recovered, questioned me and allowed me to come back if Rhoe allowed. To make a better impression. I accepted, but I hurried out with obscure words. I wonder what her tree looks like. I wonder if I should simply be myself next time. I wonder who myself is at this point.  Hopefully, when I next meet them I will have found some semblance of that answer. Not for any grand purpose mind you, but so that I don't have to put on that outrageous apologetic persona.
Oh yes, before I close you, Atticus knew Avalyn. I admitted to being a apologetic to his fiance, whom I called his wife several times, because of Avalyn. I did not mean to wound a woman with child.Â
[sup]For my reference, Mi'qote clans are very traditional and do not like being referred to as cats. [/sup]
Father, wherever you are, Â if you ever read this, I damn you for what you did to me...
Dear Diary,
I’m not sure how to explain this one. In short time I’ve managed to upset two pregnant women, and turn a whole clan of keepers against me. The shining grace in this entry is Rivienne’s tale, it’s been some time since I told you of her plan for her legacy. But… to the beginning.
Avalyn, you remember her don’t you? I’ve been searching for an ex-lover of hers, but it’s been more difficult than I’d hoped. So, I found her again, glimpsing as a book of charcoal drawings she herself had done. She’s quite talented, and I was able to see a few faces she knew, including the one of the man who gave her child. But he wasn’t the one I was looking for, and to be honest, she’d very nearly ended my search. Avalyn had spoken to an old friend I think, someone who knew Corbec and told her of his despair and how without her he has become a recluse, or gone mad. I’m not sure, if they really should have been together or not, for the man seems unwilling to rectify this distance. I still wish to see it through if I can, I don’t like not finding someone, but such weakness in a man, it inspires curiosity and disappointment. So we focused on Avalyn, and this is where my first mistake began.
My father taught me a great deal of ways to ‘handle’ people. When you’re but a boy, some prefer manners, others chivalry, and even more find confident, flirtatious young men charming. But I was but a boy then, and my antics were endearing to women. Taunting Avalyn, though I’d like to believe I wasn’t rude about it, had upset her when she’d turned too red and I’d revealed I was simply gauging her limit on proximity. She took to insult, and got up to leave. I knew then that I really didn’t remember how to handle people, or perhaps my father’s ways had been incorrect. Maybe I didn’t mature enough, but it’s all I knew.
Perhaps, I will never do my old friends justice.
I followed her, wholly apologetic and trying to explain myself. I meant no harm, but that didn’t mean it wasn’t wrong I suppose. I’m trying to write this from the view of the outsider, but… I don’t understand why my actions had such effect over her.
She forgave me, to my relief and we walked, farther and farther out of Gridania and to a cave where she said she spent much of her youth. She told me of her mother, of not having a father and how she had ended up where she was. I’m not sure meeting a father is always good, if you think of mine, and hers refused to even acknowledge her and her mother, apparently he had a real family. I attempted to simply listen and ask here and there, understanding a little more how she had fallen for the first man she did, and was now with his child. He bit her here apparently, he liked to bite her.
I think her child might be void-touched as well. But, as of right now it was no concern of mine. Avalyn wants a man in her life, but she can do better than me. I have never been in one place for long, like many, and it’s clear my understanding of humanity is limited. Still, I offered her my arm and returned her to the inn, where a Mi’qote claiming to be a bodyguard addressed her. She spoke to him,so they knew one another, and despite my warning not to keep her up late, he ignored me. Looking back, I wonder if I have any tact with Mi’qote.
A day or two later I met Rivienne again, surprisingly enough in The Roost just as I had with Avalyn. I did not think I would be frequenting this forest. She wanted to speak to me, according to a letter she had sent, but upon seeing her I began to state that it was strange to see her without Thaarus, ‘a matching pair’ as of late, when the man showed up. They were quickly upon one another, with sweet nothings and affection. It made me happy to see her, but I felt like I couldn’t speak to Rivienne as I once had. We spoke for a bit, the three of us, of what I can’t recall.
Eudalie arrived, I greeted her warmly, just as a drunken man strode forward and spilled his drink onto Rivienne’s lap purposely. Needless to say she and Thaarus were furious in tandem. It didn’t take long to make the man back down, but I was thoroughly amused. More so than I should have been, of course Thaarus and Rivienne took to my comment of disrobing and washing the garment together and alone without pleasure. I wonder, am I relying on this persona too much?
While they cooed over one another I spoke to Eudalie until I heard a man speak of Odin, and the armor he had obtained from him was dropped with a mender. So of course, I dragged Eudalie over and started speaking to the Mi’qote whom I called ‘Black Cat’. He didn’t like company, but it didn’t dissuade me and soon I had the entire entourage around him, making him more uncomfortable as I inquired further. A man who slayed Odin, caught my interest of course. I like strangers, so I spoke to him of more and soon we all handled the introductions. Eudalie though, is worth note.
Flustered by her rudeness, for not introducing herself sooner she bowed so hard and quick she hit her head upon the table. It was thoroughly amusing, though… she damaged the new hat of mine I had slipped upon her head! Ah but, Thaarus is a tailor. She didn’t seem to notice her own pain and just continued to despair as she realized she had also wounded my hat. Eudalie never ceases to amaze me with her purity and sweetness. Ah, but the Black Cat Lathu’a left, pardoning himself for another journey. Thaarus who’d grown weary headed for rest. So Rivienne took the stage.
She told me of her family in Ishgard, how they had once been a family of nobility and how her brothers had chosen to keep it from her to keep her safe. She had disguised herself, sought them, and in the middle of Dravanian attack found  one.
Marceloix, if I remember the name, had died some time ago and was the brother they all sought to belike. Louix, she found him and tried to protect him the field. He recognized her despite her change in appearance and saved her instead. He smiled and died listening to Rivienne singing their mother’s lullaby. Lanceloix had left some time ago and she did not know where he was. Despite all this, and her desire for her own bloody legacy, her brother died loved and not alone, and instead of sinking into despair she found Thaarus and now seemed happier than ever. I was grateful to the twelve for this turn of fate, and I assured her that she would be well. I’m not sure if my words really did much for her, but I’m glad she is no longer seeking a bloody end. Still, it made me wonder. We parted ways then, and I choseto follow a Mi’qote who seemed troubled.
[sup]This entry is lengthy, but perhaps it is the greatest sign of my growth thus far. Or perhaps I just listen too frequently.[/sup]
I approached her at the Lavender Beds, we spoke of overcoming one another’s senses, I tried to push her into the water and cast my magic to prevent myself from falling in as I stumbled. My hands trembled and the ice floor soon shattered. I am getting better, even without Avalt, but it is taking time. As long as I don’t have another outburst.
Anyway, despite my better instincts diary I followed her to her home to meet her clan. I used my usual demeanor, not my charming self, but the one who seems flirtatious, keeping people at bay while being inviting. Their home was grand, but I wondered how a Keeper clan could happily live so close to civilization and allow guests within. Ah but this is where things became deranged. They asked me to remove my weapons and I did, lots of them. They wanted me to jump and I taunted to take my clothes off. The guard kit was not impressed. She called me pasty and someone informed me that I was a ginger, so I joked that I had no soul. Eventually, I satisfied them that I had no weapons. A lie.
I met a few of them, a dark skinned man named Ken introduced himself at the door, but the others were less than inviting. I didn’t mind. I found out a short time later why. Some attack had occurred and it made me wonder why Rhoe would invite me in under such circumstances. I had no ill intent but how were they to know? After a brief tour we ran into a Mi’qote being rude and bratty. At first I tried to confront her with reason, but she pissed me off and I called her a brat. Things went bad from there. Her husband arrived, and though I apologized, not out of fear but annoyance things did not get better.
A screaming Mi’qote was being tended to by the group and I wondered why I was here, but curiosity bade me to stay. One room after another I infuriated a new member of this clan. I tried not to, I fell into a habit my father had taught me once again. I tried to be quiet, simple, insignificant. I heard one inquire as to why I had been acting like I mattered. I was only trying to get an answer for Rhoe, not intervene. The husband Hyur of the onion mi’qote didn’t take to me, despite confessing that I apologized. I didn’t need to be liked, but I needed to be tolerated if I wanted to see the end of this story. So I did what I could, apologized here and there, became a silent little apologetic thing. It disgusted me to do so.
Though I wanted to learn about a clan I have to say, I hope they are not all like this. Those I’ve met, while weary of outsiders had more control. But I did want to learn. They tolerated me when they should have kicked me out. Their mannerisms were garish, and I realized what was happening a short time later. They were not individuals, and when I speak to people, including the pissed off onion mi’qote I consider them as individuals in what they do. But this was a family, and one who did not know how to handle my presence. They wanted me gone, but refused to say it outright at first. I tried to speak to another Mi’qote, Cemi I think her name was.
Honestly, she seems kind but the girl doesn’t look like she had been beyond the front porch despite her claims. Oh yes, before I forget they all repeat themselves. Atticus Buffalobane, told me not to upset people more times than I can count. My ignorance is not abstinence from my mistake, but I agreed more times than I can count. I don’t think they are used to the answers of outsiders.
I was warned so many times despite my having switched to what I assumed was a less intimidating mode, that it became tiring and well tedious.
These are not complains diary, these are observations, for honestly, they intrigued me above all else. I caught whispers of their conversation, a whisper of a man named Roen. I’d thought a Mi’qote was giving birth but it seems it was some tragedy going on.
Oh yes, they are so protective I could not even tend to a wounded companion of theirs. She was alright regardless of course. I have never seen this much of a clan, I tried to remain an outsider to watch them after my mistakes but they pained themselves to keep an eye on me. I think they really thought I believed myself important, but there is a reason I let others tell me of themselves and not the other way around. I don’t make myself important. It’s too attention grabbing.
I have not been exiled, and the Mi’qote vice matron had recovered, questioned me and allowed me to come back if Rhoe allowed. To make a better impression. I accepted, but I hurried out with obscure words. I wonder what her tree looks like. I wonder if I should simply be myself next time. I wonder who myself is at this point.  Hopefully, when I next meet them I will have found some semblance of that answer. Not for any grand purpose mind you, but so that I don't have to put on that outrageous apologetic persona.
Oh yes, before I close you, Atticus knew Avalyn. I admitted to being a apologetic to his fiance, whom I called his wife several times, because of Avalyn. I did not mean to wound a woman with child.Â
[sup]For my reference, Mi'qote clans are very traditional and do not like being referred to as cats. [/sup]
Father, wherever you are, Â if you ever read this, I damn you for what you did to me...
