(02-04-2015, 12:14 PM)Gegenji Wrote: I wonder, is it possible to go too far the other way, too? I ask because I might fall into that camp at times. Though it might just be general worry about the other person in general.
Basically, I mean that you worry so much about trying to keep things friendly and cordial that you're tempted to continually double-check with the other person to make sure everything's cool. I haven't quite hit the point where I had a character be really mean to someone IC and immediately follow it with a stream of "IMSORRYIMSORRYIMSORRY *hugs*" OOCly (possibly due to Chachan's generally friendly nature)... but it does feel like something I would honestly do.
Along with that is a sort of... after-the-fact doubt? You did something with someone, it's over and done with, but you keep wondering if it was okay. If they were okay with it, and if everything's still cool all around. My best example of this was a training session for Chachan with Sei... I got all caught up in the choreographing aspect of free-form combat since I hadn't done it in a while. Sei rightfully pointed out I was no-selling her character's attacks, and I immediately tried to over-sell to compensate. And afterward I STILL felt real bad about it.
I have a lot of fun RPing with everyone and I want them to have fun too... and the chance that I might ruin that or overstep my boundaries worries me to no end at times.
Usually if a scene is heading in a dark direction (a fight, robbery, etc), I'll pause things for a brief conversation about what's okay and what's not okay. To avoid continually re-checking, I'll throw something in about saying something if anything goes too far. The best way to think of it is like a safe word: It's an established out for when things go to far.
What you're talking about here, Chach, is more of a RP etiquette thing, and that gets a little more fuzzy. Sei, in your example, felt that you weren't taking hits that you should have, and you agreed. It's cut and dried. It gets a little harder to work with if it's less black and white: What if Sei said you should be taking hits that you didn't think you should be taking. That's a source for a longer conversation, I think, but there are always going to be unresolvable differences there. Especially in conflict, there are people who simply can't bear the thought of their character's losing.
With conflict RP of any sort, you really, really have to trust the people you're RPing with if you do it freeform. You have to trust their (and your) commitment to the story, and trust that whatever they do they do for the benefit of the story. If you can't, that's a sign you should suggest using some sort of randomizer to resolve things. This doesn't just apply to combat, it could apply anywhere.