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Iroh · **08-24-2010, 12:15 PM**

I wasn't going to originally do this, but then I happened to be put forth with a challenge that felt... well... epic.

Quote:Your challenge is to write crossover fanfiction combining Blue's Clues and The Bible. The story should use oral sex as a plot device!

Warning, the following may offend, so I'm putting it in a spoiler just in case >.>

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SpoilerFirst Blueinthians 69:

'And behold, a youth in a green striped shirt stood up to put her to the test, saying, "Blue, what shall I do to inherit eternal life?" She barked to him. And he answered, saying, "What is written in the law? How do I read?" Blue barked again, and he answered, "You shall love the Lord your Blue with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your strength, and with all your mind; and your neighbor as yourself?" And Blue again barked unto him, after which he replied, "You art correct, teacher; We are going to partake in Blue's Clues, as thou art a really fun game!."

'So he, desiring to clarify himself, said to Blue, "And who is my neighbor?" Blue replied, by barking. Much barking was shown. The green shirted youth then said, " Ah, so a man was going down from Jerusalem to Jericho, and he fell among robbers, who stripped him and beat him, and departed, leaving him half dead. Now by chance a secretary was going down that road; and when she saw him she passed by on the other side. So likewise a Doctor, when she came to the place and saw him, passed by on the other side. But a Samaritan, as she journeyed, came to where he was; and when she saw him, she had compassion, and went to him and bound up his wounds, pouring on oil and wine; then she gave him a blow job. She then set him on his own beast and brought him to an inn, and took care of him with further oral ministrations. And the next day she took out two denarii and gave them to the innkeeper, saying, Ã¢Â€Â˜Take care of him; and whatever more you spend, I will repay you when I come back with the oral pleasure.Ã¢Â€Â™

'Which of these three, do you think, proved neighbor to the man who fell among the robbers, you ask us?" The man finished in his translation of Blue.'

'To the unseen children gathered he then said unto them,"I believe I may need your help, will thou help me?" To which the children cried they would. The youth then cried, "Hosanna! Blue's Clue, Blue's Clues, pull forth thy notebook and find the paw prints, for when we use our minds and think, think, think in the holy thinking chair, we can do anything that we wish to do."'

'Following this there was much silly dancing. After many clues had been determined, the youth in the green striped shirt finally said unto Blue, "I believe we have just figured out Blue's Clues, as we art really smart! Teacher, was the neighbor," Here he did pause, dramatically, "the one who gave him a blow job?"'

'Blue then barked unto them all, and it was good.'

'And thus the youth said, "The one who blew his holy flute is correct!"'

'And Blue spoke unto them at last to say, "Go and do likewise."''

'And it was very good.'

Diyne · **08-25-2010, 05:15 AM**

Tyriont Wrote:This one was just too easy and appropriate not to use.

Quote:Your challenge is to write crossover fanfiction combining Shaun of the Dead and Superbad. The story should use a zombie attack as a plot device!

So...much...potential...

Which reminds me that Scott Pilgrim was amazing. (Just like, my opinion, man.)

Iroh Wrote:I wasn't going to originally do this, but then I happened to be put forth with a challenge that felt... well... epic.

Quote:Your challenge is to write crossover fanfiction combining Blue's Clues and The Bible. The story should use oral sex as a plot device!

Old or new testament? =p

Diyne · **08-25-2010, 05:20 AM**

Tyriont Wrote:This one was just too easy and appropriate not to use.

Quote:Your challenge is to write crossover fanfiction combining Shaun of the Dead and Superbad. The story should use a zombie attack as a plot device!

So...much...potential...

Which reminds me that Scott Pilgrim was amazing. (Just like, my opinion, man.)

Iroh Wrote:I wasn't going to originally do this, but then I happened to be put forth with a challenge that felt... well... epic.

[quote[Your challenge is to write crossover fanfiction combining Blue's Clues and The Bible. The story should use oral sex as a plot device!

Old or new testament? =p

Diyne · **08-25-2010, 05:21 AM**

Tyriont Wrote:This one was just too easy and appropriate not to use.

Quote:Your challenge is to write crossover fanfiction combining Shaun of the Dead and Superbad. The story should use a zombie attack as a plot device!

So...much...potential...

Which reminds me that Scott Pilgrim was amazing. (Just like, my opinion, man.)

Iroh Wrote:I wasn't going to originally do this, but then I happened to be put forth with a challenge that felt... well... epic.

[quote[Your challenge is to write crossover fanfiction combining Blue's Clues and The Bible. The story should use oral sex as a plot device!

Old or new testament? =p

Asyria · **08-25-2010, 11:23 AM**

Triple post!

Iroh · **08-25-2010, 11:27 AM**

Diyne Wrote:Old or new testament? =p

I went with new, it was more fitting!

Diyne · **08-26-2010, 12:18 AM**

Oh jeez, I'm so sorry. 0_o; My internet was freaking out at the time I posted.

Asyria · **08-27-2010, 12:16 PM**

Okay okay... last one!
I hope.
I just went there anc clicked Refresh a few times for fun and giggles and I simply couldn't resist doing this one.

Your challenge is to write crossover fanfiction combining Hellsing and the Muppet Show. The story should use hypnosis as a plot device!

It was a dark night and the moon was full, shining through the mist in the streets and alleys of London. A perfect night for Halloween, but also a perfect night for hunting.The Hellsing organization's pet vampire Alucard was out to get a freak who was preying on children . As the freak has targeted mostly goths, it is a concern that he would go after kids dressed as vampire and this could not be allowed.

Unaware of the dangers, a group of friends stopped in a parc to decide whether to go back home or continue their run, as it was getting late. Among them was a frog disguised as a pirate, a rather energetic guy disguised as a ghost with a blanket with holes for his eye, and a blue eagle dressed as count Dracula, who seemed more intent on going back home, and a few other weirdos.
"The hour grows late, it would be wise to head back." said the blue guy.
To which the frog replied "Let's see how much candies we have so far?"
"CANDIES!" bellowed the ghost happily.

As the friends were making their count, a shiver ran down their spines as a strange man showed up, grinning madly in the night. His gaze was met by the brave blue eagle, the one dressed as Dracula as he defiantly put himself between his friends and the newcomer who looked rather... dangerous.
"May we help you in any way?"

The man simply gazed into his eyes and soon, the eagle was just staring blankly at him, until the man finally talked. "You want to be a vampire, you poser? Then go ahead and bite your friends, empty them of their blood and sate yourself." The frog looked pretty worried hearing that, unsurprisingly. "Uhm.. Sam? Sam, are you alright?" The eagle named Sam slowly turned toward the frog and raised his hands. "Bloooood!"

"AAAHHHHH! He's become a vampire!" The frog started running around in circle, followed by his friends, some of whom were really scared while others simply seemed to follow because it seemed like the thing to do. The hypnotised Sam of course went after them, and all were running around in circle.

At this point, another weird man walked calmly toward them dressed in red, his eyes hidden between round goggles. "You dare speak of insults and call yourself a vampire... You are nothing but a delusional freak who prey on the weak. Come find out what a true vampire is made of so I can send your impure soul into the deepest pits of hell."

It was all over very quick. The 'freak' attacked, and the vampire punched his open hand right through the guy's chest, turning him to dust in an instant. "Bah, no need to waste bullets on you... That you could even hypnotize anyone is a real joke, that guy must be a real puppet. It should wear off soon anyway..." And without further word or action, the vampire Alucard disappeared into the night, his job done.

Higher up,a pair of old geezers had watched the scene from their apartment balcony.
"Well I don't know the difference between a real and a false vampire but I know how vampires and this story are alike!"
"They both suck!"
And the two geezers laughed together.

FIN

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