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+--- Thread: How can I hold all these roleplayer crushes? (/showthread.php?tid=13894)
RE: How can I hold all these roleplayer crushes? - Nero - 10-15-2015
Having a roleplayer crush would require actually involving myself in the community or something. No way.
Joking aside, I don't think I've ever really had anything of the sort. At least, not to the point where I felt like I couldn't or shouldn't approach them. All of the roleplay I have kind of just...happened, or came from people who approached me. That said, it's probably good to mention that I basically never do walk-up, spontaneous, or public channel open roleplay. I'm so jaded that China could claim me as a historical artifact and these avenues of interaction have little to no quality control save for the simultaneously loveable and dreaded, reprehensible mechanic of the retcon.
At the risk of revealing my incredible ego, I have been told by others before about being the subject of a crush of this sort, but the names are usually withheld from me and I've not been contacted directly by anyone new in more than a year on this forum.
RE: How can I hold all these roleplayer crushes? - Faye - 10-15-2015
I've had RP crushes. I usually just ignore it and sit and mope because I'm awkward and anxiety-ridden and can't actually bring myself to initiate contact with someone I admire most of the time. Best I can usually do is hope to catch them somewhere IC, hope my character has a reason to approach them, and see what sticks. But this one time I had an RP crush and he's my RP partner now, so sometimes things work out, I guess!
RE: How can I hold all these roleplayer crushes? - Siha - 10-15-2015
- Did you have any of these "roleplayer crushes"? y/n, is it just me, being a creepy nugget?
I most definitely have had roleplayer crushes, actually I have tons of them, but I die a little inside when I get close to talking with any of them. I'll stare awkwardly, shuffle in their direction, lift a finger to poke them AND THEN SEE THEM TALKING TO SOMEONE AND BOLT. I'm awful at actually initiating contact and I know it.
- How do you handle these? Do you just send an aggressive PM/tell with things like "you, me, RP, 8PM EST"?
Personally I don't, it's more 'oh well maybe we should RP sometime if I'm not being a bother' but honestly I think the aggressive approach works so much better. I am notorious (I'm sure) for being hard to get a hold of it our meeting is nebulous in nature, it works so much better when you just sit me down and tell me when we're RPing. THEN. I will listen and show up! \o/
- Stories to share? Bonus points for embarrassing things.
Ahahaha, I couldn't even!
- Did senpai notice you, when you started emoting at them very very loudly?
I...I think so? ;A;
- Just how excited do you get when plotting with these new people, and realize they love your ideas and bring even more material on the table?
Extremely excited, I feel like I hyperventilate whenever I find out someone enjoys my RP and I'm over the moon when theirs brings so much to the table. Who isn't though? It's always nice to know you have something in common with the person you're RPing with or that the person you're plotting with has some amazing ideas. This has been the case every time I've plucked up the courage, we have some amazing story crafters in our community!
- Did like, once, this person was actually pretty awful and you regretted everything? Happened to me more than I'd like to admit, BUT, I still keep on pushing.
I wouldn't say awful but maybe once or twice. .___.
RE: How can I hold all these roleplayer crushes? - Caspar - 10-15-2015
(10-15-2015, 07:22 PM)Nero Wrote: Having a roleplayer crush would require actually involving myself in the community or something. No way.An ego? How could anyone jaded and avoiding RP with the general public develop an ego? Impossible. XD
Joking aside, I don't think I've ever really had anything of the sort. At least, not to the point where I felt like I couldn't or shouldn't approach them. All of the roleplay I have kind of just...happened, or came from people who approached me. That said, it's probably good to mention that I basically never do walk-up, spontaneous, or public channel open roleplay. I'm so jaded that China could claim me as a historical artifact and these avenues of interaction have little to no quality control save for the simultaneously loveable and dreaded, reprehensible mechanic of the retcon.
At the risk of revealing my incredible ego, I have been told by others before about being the subject of a crush of this sort, but the names are usually withheld from me and I've not been contacted directly by anyone new in more than a year on this forum.
Never been contacted though, in a year? Given your visibility, that's surprising.
I think that I don't have a right to complain about lack of RP, or avoiding RP, because there are definitely people who want to play with me, but I've been scarce lately. I still need to play with people on my friend list that wired me here on the RPC or through /tell with some interest.
A lot of people involved with my character left my FC or aren't playing much though. Realistically, the connection shouldn't die, but it's put a damper on my plans, and sapped at my will to develop substantive plot lines or events. I need stability now to really feel comfortable creating more interesting scenes that involve more than a few other people. I think a big problem is me not belonging to an ls with those players, and needing to use /tell to get in touch with them.
I have a lot of confidence in my ability to write, but I've definitely seen better days. I spent a long time not RPing and as a perfectionist, I always feel I can do better. Since it's been said I type at the speed of thought, sometimes when I get nervous I unload something cumbersome and verbose with 90wpm. Thus the constant editing. There are still so many RPers I want to play with, and I often feel like I'm the one who's eager to impress. Thus I get a bit anxious, not because I don't think I can write well enough to play with them, but because I fear self-sabotage. Of course, that in itself self-sabotages. I think a big wall to me playing with others is that overwhelming tendency to ramble.
The other thing I'm always anxious about is meshing well. Do they feel there is a place in their character's story for mine, even in a minor role? Are they wary of me as a person? What they think of me OOC seems to be important to a lot of players, and quite a few are so wary of others, it feels like I'm walking on candy glass trying to speak to them. I've a strong paranoid streak, so I'm intimately familiar with that anxiety, but I also find it a bit sad. So many people have had bad experiences RPing and are extremely guarded, and it's really a shame they had to go through that. After years of playing with people from the perspective of a veteran, it was an odd experience to me to have to prove myself a safe pick, a capable RPer worthy of playing with. I went through incredible effort compared to my old forum just to get in an FC. I'm happy that I did, but initially at least it caught me off guard. I understand very well the struggle of new players to find people to interact with.
But I think it's important to know what kind of person you're going to play with, and talking through tells and PM has helped a lot. If you've wanted to play with me and I have been quiet about it in game, please follow through and I'll do everything I can to free up time for it. Of course, it goes both ways. RL hasn't been kind to me lately, to put things lightly, and I've honestly not had the energy to write anything substantive; even my story is sort of disappointing to me as far as the first post goes. A lot of times when people can't play with you, it's due to RL demands too, and not any particular dislike of you or your character.
But anyway, I've quite a few people who want to play with me, and quite a few people who I want to play with, and the anxiety about initiating RP or finding a reason to meet up goes both ways. I usually PM or /tell, but a lot of interactions I've started up just by happening to be in the area they're in. I did, after all, specifically gun for the FC I was interested in from when I read the wiki, as well as several characters whose wikis I read. I felt a bit like a stalker, but I knew what I wanted out of the game and went for it. I had Virara be in the area those characters were, and interactions formed naturally. Of course, I also used /tell and PM to hit them up for RP as well. It's not like I followed them everywhere or orbited around them, but just being available for RP where they liked to play was very beneficial. I'm always really eager to play with people who want to do something more than casual interaction, but in that regard I've had mixed success. There are definitely a lot of players who participated in a story event I ran who clearly have an interest in following my character around and learning more about the people she happens to know, as it's really more about them than her, but most of those characters have scattered since then and like I mentioned before, communicating without an ls or FC is really tough.
RE: How can I hold all these roleplayer crushes? - CrimsonMars - 10-16-2015
I just got over mine recently but it put me under a state of depression for a couple of months. I'd rather not talk too much about it, but at the very least, it's wasn't like me and my partner had any real issues with each other or nothing.
RE: How can I hold all these roleplayer crushes? - Garalona - 10-16-2015
I have a crush on everybody.
RE: How can I hold all these roleplayer crushes? - Nebbs - 10-16-2015
I don't crush so much as spot folks I think .. Hmm that might be a nice RP, or they maybe need a hand.
I almost never PM people for RP, I prefer a more IC approach. Often that involves spotting the person is on (I have a search macro I fill with those from RPC who wanted some RP) and then IC bumping into them. Then things either gel into fruitful RP or it is just a passing exchange.
Other than that I generally RP at people as I am out and about, and maybe 20% of those get a response.
But then I am from the pre-internet era, where nightclubs were the main way to meet people. So you had to walk up and initiate some kind of contact with a stranger. BTW I was terrified and not very good at it.
From my own perspective I am always IC (or able to flip IC). I respond IC if talked to. I am happy to receive PMs and often drop anything (but RP) to go RP.
My immediate turn off's are.. RPing while in DF/PF, not staying IC, wearing end game gear like a badge. After that I look for responsiveness & willingness to give to the RP.
RE: How can I hold all these roleplayer crushes? - Volk - 10-16-2015
oooo fun thread !
Did you have any of these "roleplayer crushes"? y/n, is it just me, being a creepy nugget?
I cant say if you are a creepy nugget or not, but i can say that if you are, I am too because I so totally can relate !
How do you handle these? Do you just send an aggressive PM/tell with things like "you, me, RP, 8PM EST"?
I have been so incredibly fortunate that really neat people have more backbone than I do and send me VERY welcome tells out of the blue saying "oh, hay i have seen you posting pictures on RPC" or "Oh i read your wiki it was neat". In fact that is how I know most of my friends in this game ! I have tried to pay it forward (I am looking your way, Eckerd !!) but i will always be slow at that - just who i am ! Generally though if someone wants to get to know me I try to be really friendly and my calendar is not so full that i cant spare a little time to get to know a new character !
Stories to share? Bonus points for embarrassing things.
Stories ? Hmm well there was this one time when this nerd named Martiallais PMed me and said 'hay come RP with me !' and I was like 'k !' or this other time when this other nerd named V'aleera and I just kept showing up at the same events and sort of got into a situation where it would have been more awkward NOT to say anything IC. That is pretty much how it goes with me ! I am easy to deal with - what can I say ?
Did senpai notice you, when you started emoting at them very very loudly?
I can't think of any times that i was bold enough to try to catch the attention of someone i really want to RP with IC. Really, it's mostly like what the lovely Ms. Faye said:
(10-15-2015, 07:24 PM)Faye Wrote: I've had RP crushes. I usually just ignore it and sit and mope because I'm awkward and anxiety-ridden and can't actually bring myself to initiate contact with someone I admire most of the time. Best I can usually do is hope to catch them somewhere IC, hope my character has a reason to approach them, and see what sticks.
Just how excited do you get when plotting with these new people, and realize they love your ideas and bring even more material on the table?
I am always sooo excited to plan and interact with new people. Like 11/10 excited - it really inspires me to get new perspectives ! Many of them totally just ate up my enthusiasm, but I have to remember that not everyone is like me.
Did like, once, this person was actually pretty awful and you regretted everything?
Idk, regrets. . . Always some regrets, ya ? I mean there have been times when i completely got off on the wrong foot with someone and just wished I had a reset button. But that's all part of the experience and I feel like it comes with the territory of meeting new people.
RE: How can I hold all these roleplayer crushes? - Roen - 10-16-2015
- Did you have any of these "roleplayer crushes"? y/n, is it just me, being a creepy nugget?
If you mean "crushes" in that I was too nervous to approach them? Not really. When I see someone on the RPC that I want to play with, or hear about a player/character that sounds interesting, I just PM them. Most people seem pretty friendly when they are approached!
- How do you handle these? Do you just send an aggressive PM/tell with things like "you, me, RP, 8PM EST"?
My PMs usually start off with "Hi! I heard you played a character that was--" or "Hey there! I saw your posts on the RPC and thought--" or some such. I usually let them know a little about my own character and if the dialogue happens, then we try to come up with a hook to at least arrange for that first RP session.
I don't just do random walk ups anymore since my character's current arc really doesn't allow her to just hang out and talk to random people. She is just not in that mindset. And with an ongoing plot and such, I would rather that things were prearranged.
- Just how excited do you get when plotting with these new people, and realize they love your ideas and bring even more material on the table?
I've had mixed experiences, all good though! Some started with just vague details and "let's wing it" kind of an attitude, and others we brainstormed quite extensively before getting started. A few have been "we can figure it out as we go along" kind of a thing.
In my history of being on the RPC, majority of the contacts I've made and the people I've continued to plot with have been a result of me contacting them. People rarely contact me for RP although when they do, I am incredibly flattered, and most of the time I am trying to figure out the context and plot hooks and such. (sorry for those who I have yet to actually make it work... >___< ) (you know who you are... I have not forgotten I swear!) There are a few that I also have been wanting to contact but... time and plot constraints have not allowed me to do so yet...
But being that so far pretty much every attempt I've made to reach out to others have been met favorably, I am not discouraged in continuing to do so and I encourage others to do the same!
RE: How can I hold all these roleplayer crushes? - Valde - 10-16-2015
It's interesting to see how many people don't act on their 'crushes' for a variety of reasons. It makes me glad I'm pretty aggressive with RPing with people in general, and that I've met some people who are of a similar mindset.
RE: How can I hold all these roleplayer crushes? - Solenne - 10-16-2015
I've had a couple RPer crushes. One in particular comes to mind, and it was rather unsatisfying.
 I think I was a bit more invested than the other person. When that happens, I just move on. I'd rather RP with someone who shares my excitement.If I spot someone I really want to RP with, I send them a /tell or a PM. Being ignored or rejected sucks, but it's worth the risk to build a network of excellent RPers. Fortunately, Solenne is not at all shy about approaching strangers, so I can usually find a reason for her to interact with another character. And I find that it helps to already have a scenario in mind when you ask someone for RP. "They meet in a tavern and talk" is fine, but "they meet in a dark alley in Ul'dah and realize that by some coincidence they're both plotting to rob the same house on the same night" is a lot more interesting, and more likely to lead to further adventures in the future.
RE: How can I hold all these roleplayer crushes? - Edgar - 10-16-2015
I've had plenty, but few people have ever sought me out.
RE: How can I hold all these roleplayer crushes? - Leggerless - 10-16-2015
If I want to RP with someone, I'm going to be pretty nonchalant and approach them for it.
If someone somehow has an RP crush on me, he/she will need to light up a signal flare just to catch my attention in-game.
RE: How can I hold all these roleplayer crushes? - Kellach Woods - 10-16-2015
- Did you have any of these "roleplayer crushes"? y/n, is it just me, being a creepy nugget?
No.
Considering the rest of the questions rely on replying "Yes" to that question, I'm outtie.
RE: How can I hold all these roleplayer crushes? - Lily_Gildrose - 10-17-2015
R-roleplay crushes? Like, all the time. Half my watchlist on tumblr is full of people I wanna RP with. Im glad I follow them with my main blog rather than my RP blog so no one will notice, hehe. Im too shy. (ILU senpai, never notice me! QQ)
How I handle it? Well, being stuck on a server with barely any RP community, I end up deprived... and I dont want to leave wonderful Moogle where I have all my friends, bf, husband-o etc.. I`ve started to spread my wings by making alts on different servers, but still - too shy! I`ve even tried to make a RP FC, and now have a LS of my own.. with just me as member.
I usually go on my alts to spread the word of RPing, but being on either my gay cat boytoy or sado black mage makes it look creepy and might scare people away. So hard to summon some courage without coming off as a total nutcase.How I react when I get to play with someone? ENDLESSLY excited, overly helpful, chatterbox and when I feel they are getting botthered by me, I withdraw into my shell and apologize for my mere existance... And I get embarrassed easily when people point out that we are RPing in the open..
Im really moody, blame my bipolarism, but I couldnt be happier for any interaction happening. Im so stoked when someone actually notice me. QwQ