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The Vent Tent - Poor PuGs and Other Terrible Tales - Printable Version

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RE: The Vent Tent - Poor PuGs and Other Terrible Tales - Enla - 05-07-2015

Dear tank,

If you're going to be derpy and mess with a run for your own amusement, do not expect any respect from me. You're the second tank I've met who has done this and have earned a place of eternal scorn. (Oooooo, scary I know. Not, but a healer can dream.) Seriously, if you're going to do a troll run - especially - in Coil, do it in a group of people who you've queued with who can stand it. Not with a DF group.

Sincerely,
The stressed healer who just wants to farm the Turns for materials and go on with her day.


RE: The Vent Tent - Poor PuGs and Other Terrible Tales - Temmi - 05-07-2015

I think... I think it's been long enough since the day of that I can share this without losing my mind again.

So I'm working on my Relic weapon. I get my first book, and I needed to do Tam Tara Deepcroft. I'm elated! What an easy dungeon! So I trundle off to kill a few mobs while registering for duty.

Queue pops.

In we go.

The dungeon is myself, as White Mage, a GLD tank, a PGL, and an ACN. So I know right off the bat that I'm the only 50. Alright, so I'll have to watch my enmity. No problems!

First pull, I give the tank a five count to grab some aggro, then I dance into Cleric Stance, take the tank's target and fire off a Stone I. It turns to me. Alright, that's fine. I can certainly heal through this. Cast Stone a few more times, get the thing killed. By now the tank needs a Cure, so I toss one his way. The other two mobs immediately gain 50% enmity. Okay, this is gonna be rough, let's just plow through. Finish that pull without DPSing anymore to try and simplify things. I stay silent, didn't want to start any drama.

The PGL, however, calls out to wait, and asks the tank if he knows how to tank. THANK YOU FOR FEELING MY FEELS, PGL. WE ARE FRIENDS. Tank says "no". Okay, let's make this easy. I Google up GLD abilities for that level. I try to instruct him to use Flash on CD, cause I'd rather wait for his TP between every pull than deal with constant enmity.

The tank asks "What is CD?"

Okay... um... I ask if he's new to FFXIV. He says yes... I ask if he's new to MMOs. He says yes. I ask if he's new to video games. HE SAYS YES. Oh dear lord Jesus on high Christ my savior please lend me the patience to not gouge my own fucking eyes out in frustration. Deep breaths. Okay. I am a good person. I got this. Everything. Is. Fine. Okay. Here we go. I try to explain the basics of MMOs and tanking. "Mobs are--" He asks what a mob is. Okay... start over. "Monsters are bad. You with me?" Spend the next fifteen minutes trying to explain things so he understands. Eventually we move on.

Nothing changes. He still loses aggro at the drop of a hat and I end up tanking far more than him. Meanwhile, the PGL is getting waaaaay too complex for this guy, talking about line of sight, active mitigation, and limit breaks. I'm sitting here thinking "BRO I LOVE YOU BUT PLEASE STOP TALKING PLEASE NOW."

By some blessing of some glorious divine creature we get to the first boss area. We kill the little mobs and the big voidbeing spawns up. The tank fails to dodge any AoEs, ends up getting 1-2-3d by an AoE, a big slash, and an auto attack from le boss. Dies. Okay... No battle rezz at this level. I got this! I healtank while stance dancing and DPS. Boss goes down a few minutes later. Tank: "What happened!?"

Fuck me.

I had to actually walk away to avoid killing a man right then and there. I get back and no one has said anything. Okay... do you know what AoEs are? No? Of course not. Okay. RED IS BAD. AVOID RED. PLEASE. DEAR LORD.

Okay, so we move on, second verse, same as the first, a little bit louder and a little bit worse. Tank dies to the second boss, questions me again. The ACN finally speaks up and asks if the GLD is playing on a console. He is, and the ACN sets up some voice comm thing to talk to him. Queue fifteen minutes while they get their shit figured out. I'm practicing meditative techniques like a fucking Buddhist monk over here. Sanity is tenuous.

After this... the ACN starts questioning the PGL and I. "Make sure to attack his target." DO YOU UNDERSTAND THAT THAT IS HARDLY AN OPTION??! FOR THE FIRST TEN SECONDS OR MORE OF COMBAT HE HAS NO TARGET. I CANNOT TARGET HIS TARGET. THAT MOB DOESN'T EXIST. He goes in, Flashes, stands there with no target.... maybe Flashes again. I don't know what the hell he's doing. Okay, I remain silent. I have two options, silence or rage. So yeah, I'm a mute suddenly.

The ACN starts casting Physick. I ask him to please stop, and to focus on DPSing, cause at this point, we only have like 25 minutes left and I'm sure as hell not going to not finish this fucking piece of shit dungeon after all the shit I've been through. This is fucking Tam Tara and I am finishing this fucking dungeon. Please DPS, you fat kumquat. One Cure I restores 50% of his HP. THERE IS NOT A HPS PROBLEM HERE.

Of course the ACN ignores my request and continues healing, so I'm so far gone at this point that I'm being petulant. "Okay, you're healing. I'll DPS. GREAT!" Third boss, he can't keep up with the tank. I see the tank slowly dying, but fuck that I'm in Cleric Stance and I'm DPSing. Tank dies. PGL dies. I die. The ACN summons his Topaz Carbuncle and manages to finish the fight like 10 minutes later. He proceeds to toot his own horn about how amazing he is. I have descended back to silence. I can't even. Those three words have never been more accurate.

I.

Can't.

Even.

Okay, kill the void barrier. Get into the last boss. I am so over this shit. I pull, everyone runs in. I spitefully let the ACN die cause I can't deal anymore. The PGL and I get the Imp adds, and deal the dermages. Eventually we finish.

Finished Tam Tara Deepcroft with 7 minutes left.

...

Okay, it hasn't been long enough for me to talk about this without losing my shit again.

Wow.

I need a drink.


RE: The Vent Tent - Poor PuGs and Other Terrible Tales - Desu Nee - 05-07-2015

Temariah, I only got one thing to say to you.

[youtube]E-WHW-QNswE[/youtube]


RE: The Vent Tent - Poor PuGs and Other Terrible Tales - Unnamed Mercenary - 05-08-2015

(05-07-2015, 10:34 PM)Temariah Wrote: The horrors of new players

I know your pain. ...I've also been that tank. (Well, I was a CNJ at the time, so not a tank, but the sane level of bad).

Timed out on Titan story mode. ...maybe 3-4 times. People eventually would ragequit. I simply could not figure out how to dodge his landslides at the time. (Changing some controls for movement camera immensely helped me).

Also timed out on Amdapor Keep a few times. Demon Wall. Hornets. It was hell.

--

On the flip side, I've also dealt with players who have absolute no idea what they're doing. ...if they're console, they're possibly even holding the controller upside down, assuming they even are holding it and not just poking it with a stick.

Ever tried to explain the THM skill rotation and why astral fire and umbral ice are important to know about? It hurts.

Frankly, I'm kinda amazed you continued through the dungeon (and cleared it no less). That's commendable patience, but I doubt the tank and arcanist probably knew what those were. One can only hope he's learned to play the game just a -little- bit more. ...or at least the solo instances will protect the duty finder.


RE: The Vent Tent - Poor PuGs and Other Terrible Tales - Kage - 05-08-2015

I was pretty upset about this MOG HM that ended up being vote abandoned Sad

Queue in, i take the time to ask the other Warrior, "<Name> do you want the King or the tank adds?" Someone volunteers to mark the order. Cool.

No answer, he just pulls. Me: Ok this guy's just going to go, since it's the PLD that is up first, he'll tank the adds.

The DPS is a little low, most of the DPS have <5K HP and so as soon as BLM shows and I'm one of the only couple to peel off to get it I know there is probably going to be an issue. The WAR does not stay on PLD, the other WAR follows the group. I get a little worried, but I think "ok this tank probably just doesn't care cause these mobs are-"

I mark WHM #2, and I have to go "whm, kill the whm moogle. guys whm moogle"
I mark the BRD #3. Mark Rogue #4. People aren't quite hitting them in order... or at least focusing on one...
During that time I had picked up WAR moogle and still thought the tank just didn't care.
Me+assume = oh crap.

Again, I ask while dancing for King Mog. "<TankName> Are you taking King or the adds?"
No. Answer.

I go, pick up King, get him out of the way... And the WAR is right fucking next to me as the PLD and WAR moogles are about to go willy nilly.

Me: "wtf <tank>"

I rush over and grab the others, getting them away from BRD etc but Flare goes off and Merry Go Rounds... so many deaths. Wipe to Memento.

Me: "Ok <tank> I will grab the moogles while you grab king."
No answer but a ready check from him.

I fix up the order, letting them know I'll take care of it marking.
We wipe because I grab the tank moogles and....
Me: "wtf <tank>"
King Mog goes crazy on everyone while the Tank is just off doing his own business.

One DPS just leaves. Another DCs.
Me+ others: "What's going on <tank>" "Why aren't you tanking?"
Tank eventually says, right before vote abandon, "I was following the numbers."

Me: -_-

I would have offered to just tank all three, but me and the healers need to know that so we don't get wreckt. I also can't really do that because the party may just poof because.. no DPS were incoming and the DPS was low already. ; ; someone put up Vote abandon and I said yes.

Queue Trials roulette, get MOG HM, Tank replies. No fuss. I got a Mogaxe and a King Mog Card!


RE: The Vent Tent - Poor PuGs and Other Terrible Tales - Chris Ganale - 05-08-2015

Dear new healer in SV:

Cure II and a regen is not the answer to everything. This tank is brand-spanking new, in welfare gear, and halfway derp geared. And likes to run off on her own. But I still like her more than you, and you being a football has nothing to do with it. I don't have to keep ballad up 24/7 because she keeps OoM'ing herself. And way to put a tornado on every single cannon in boss 2.


RE: The Vent Tent - Poor PuGs and Other Terrible Tales - LiadansWhisper - 05-08-2015

Temariah,

Have I ever told you about the time I queued for...some low level dungeon (think it was Sastasha) and the tank insisted on RP-walking up to mobs and waving at them before actually hitting them?

He would cast Flash when they were on the other side of the room.  Bouncy


RE: The Vent Tent - Poor PuGs and Other Terrible Tales - Temmi - 05-08-2015

(05-08-2015, 08:42 PM)LiadansWhisper Wrote: Temariah,

Have I ever told you about the time I queued for...some low level dungeon (think it was Sastasha) and the tank insisted on RP-walking up to mobs and waving at them before actually hitting them?

He would cast Flash when they were on the other side of the room.  Bouncy

At least this implies an understanding of the game world. ._.

After all, he knew what mobs were.


RE: The Vent Tent - Poor PuGs and Other Terrible Tales - LiadansWhisper - 05-08-2015

(05-08-2015, 09:57 PM)Temariah Wrote:
(05-08-2015, 08:42 PM)LiadansWhisper Wrote: Temariah,

Have I ever told you about the time I queued for...some low level dungeon (think it was Sastasha) and the tank insisted on RP-walking up to mobs and waving at them before actually hitting them?

He would cast Flash when they were on the other side of the room.  Bouncy

At least this implies an understanding of the game world. ._.

After all, he knew what mobs were.

This was after I explained to him what he needed to do.  Four times.


RE: The Vent Tent - Poor PuGs and Other Terrible Tales - Cato - 05-08-2015

I'll RP heal you in a dungeon IC sometime, Liadan.

(For added fun my character can't use magic!)


RE: The Vent Tent - Poor PuGs and Other Terrible Tales - LiadansWhisper - 05-08-2015

(05-08-2015, 11:38 PM)Graeham Ridgefield Wrote: I'll RP heal you in a dungeon IC sometime, Liadan.

(For added fun my character can't use magic!)

Bomb


RE: The Vent Tent - Poor PuGs and Other Terrible Tales - SunTzu7 - 05-09-2015

One of my personal peeves is when I'm doing something as a White Mage and my other healer doesn't chip in on Swiftcast raising. Scholars in particular, since Aetherflow's on a minute cooldown.

Hey, Scholar in Shiva Extreme. There's no Bard. She's staff moding constantly. Lots of AoE healing here. Drains a lot of MP. Could you maybe raise that guy with your limitless MP reserves? No? Leave it to me? 'Kay.


RE: The Vent Tent - Poor PuGs and Other Terrible Tales - Reshie - 05-10-2015

Can I say I'm tired of the lies and the bullshit? I get not liking someone. Fine. That doesn't mean you have to be hateful to them or anyone associated with them. If you don't like someone, just don't be around them. It's really not that hard. There is no reason to bad mouth and make stuff up about that person or their FC just so you can feel better about yourself. Did it ever dawn on you that you're hurting more than just the person you're pissed at? Well, did it? Or do you even give two shits? Has your childishness made you feel any fucking better? We're adults here, why is it so hard to act like that? Just because you're online and in a video game doesn't give anyone the right to be a total bitch. If you wouldn't do it in your real life, don't do it here. If you wouldn't want it done to you, don't do it to others. I'll be honest when I say I no longer have any desire to RP in this game and I'm not even the one everyone seems to have issues with. I'm just a bystander who gets to see it all... over and over and over again. I have never seen such hatred, childishness and lack of respect for others in my life and I HAVE played other MMOs. I'm appalled by this kind of behavior. It would never even cross my mind to do this to someone else so forgive me for not understanding how it's so easy for others to do this. 

Please, the next time you're upset with someone, before you do anything, think about how you would feel if it were done to you or your friends. Please don't hide behind the fact this is a video game. There are real people behind the characters... real people who just want to have a little bit of fun when they're online. You don't know what happens in their day to day life. This might be their only escape and when you pull stunts like this... it could ruin more than just their game time. So please, please, please, please think before you act.


RE: The Vent Tent - Poor PuGs and Other Terrible Tales - Chris Ganale - 05-10-2015

Dear t2,

Enough with the fucking Allagan jewelry. Nobody fucking wants it stop fucking dropping it. Or else orbital strikes.


RE: The Vent Tent - Poor PuGs and Other Terrible Tales - Kahn'a - 05-11-2015

The Low-level roulette tank that immediately quits the duty with a big grin.

Quote:(???) I queued for the wrong instance lol
(???) ily

I shall eat my fingers. With a big grin as well.