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Zhavi · **03-31-2015, 11:25 AM**

(03-31-2015, 07:28 AM)Warren Castille Wrote:
(03-31-2015, 01:24 AM)Zaheela Wrote: I was just inquiring because some people may find it easier to try and break in with at least some OOC interactions, which are less intimidating then RPing/Preforming. But everyone is different, and there are different things and methods that work for different people.

Find people you think would be cool to talk to and PM them out of the blue. Comment on their forum posts, ask them about storylines, tell them you think they'd be cool to chat with. Vast majority of the folks here are actually very nice from what I've found.

This, this, this, this.

When I was starting back up in Feb last year, the very first thing I did was hit up the wiki and search out characters I thought were cool or interesting. I would check the activity of the player and then pm them. Most of the time things would fall through, but I wound up netting myself a few people I rped with regularly -- and most of those were people who rarely (if ever) posted on the forums here.

The rudest I ever got was people standing me up and then not replying; I think you'll find here that people will go out of their way to avoid being outright rude to you, though you will likely get your share of 'no's, people standing you up, or your rp style just not jiving with someone else's rp style.

You do gotta make some effort, though. People cannot yet read minds, and even if it's just posting in the making connections forum or pming someone, you gotta put yourself out there and followup. RP is a social beast.

... and I say that as someone who has had social anxiety issues (I can rant for hours about the rampant sexism amongst the younger set at the only really weightlifting focused gym in town, and how idiotic the machismo is, and how I won't go anymore because of how shitty it makes me feel -- so I get the being shy and not wanting to put yourself out there, but at a certain point you do have to make that choice of whether you will or won't).

edit - and I also want to point out, when I came back there was no making connections forum. So, you know, it was very easy to think that no one wanted to rp with me and I had to convince them that I was worth rping with. Every time I sent a pm (and I sent a lot) I'd have that feeling of 'what if they tell me I suck?' . . . but no one did. I'm talking, man, the people I sent pms to didn't know me at all, didn't know how I rped, and so on. Yet out of every batch a few would be willing to set something up with me.

When I saw some people saying they didn't have anyone to rp with, I would pm them and offer myself up on a silver platter. BOOM instarp. It wasn't always easy and it didn't always work out, but I made some great rp buddies that way. Smile

Aya · **03-31-2015, 11:34 AM**

I dunno. I totally bite.

Berrod Armstrong · **03-31-2015, 11:38 AM**

(03-31-2015, 11:34 AM)Aya Wrote: I dunno. I totally bite.

Scandalous, Aya!

Zhavi's example rings pretty true though! We only got one scene in after Zhav got in contact with me, but I think I had been pretty busy building my FC at that point in time. BUT. The connection is still there, and quite open! That's the way it gooooeessss.

Ilwe'ran · **04-06-2015, 09:27 AM**

(03-31-2015, 12:42 AM)Tiergan Wrote: That said -- I think what Ilwe'ran was trying to dispel the notion that older members have all the keys to the castle in terms of unlocking RP with the rest of the community. Especially since just being in the community for a while may not be a guarantee that they're in a much better place than the new guy/gal is if they just happen to be one of those shy, struggling-to-find-RP older members. Both old and new RPers should be hunting down RP with both old and new RPers.

I forgot to answer to this, but yes, that's what I meant.
It's not because you're there since long that you have a lot of RP and the term "community" itself always sounded wrong to me. We can be considered as a community as we are all there for the same thing : RPing, but at the same time, we're all so different from each others that we cannot consider us as some sort of homogeneous group.
The RP community on Balmung is for me really diverse and more like.. Some small groups next to each others, included in bigger groups (like LS / Plots including a few groups of people / FC) but nothing much like a big community with the same goal.
That's why every time I read someone saying it's hard to join the RP community, I shake a bit my head and I just think "You just didn't find the right small group which fit to your sort of RP" .
To me, it's not like meeting even one of those veteran will ever change a thing to your situation, you will only meet some other people aside who fit the RP of that person, it's not like meeting someone who has the key of the community as a whole, but more someone who already found their group(s) where they are comfortable to RP with.

I just think that the first work you have to do is to know more of yourself, what you like, how you like it and how your character is. This can seem weird, I mean.. This can seem obvious, but how many of you really know what sort of RP they like and they want when they create their character in a new place and in a new community ? We all change with time and sometimes we discover that the people we first talked to and had some RP with aren't those fitting the most to what we really prefer.
So, before nudging some groups, I think best is to do a small introspection to know exactly what you're seeking for and to accept that those you will meet will not be the same sort of RPer as you are or won't have the time to add you to their circle.

Because, here is the thing : You cannot RP with 150 people. As for IRL, you can only have a few partners, a small group with who you will go in deep with your character and thus having this one growing up. I mean.. You can have a lot of buddies, people you meet once in a while for one or other thing (can be tavern buddies, work buddies, etc.) lets say "buddies with who you will share one facet of your character" but you will only have a few people really knowing about your character and probably one RP partner who will be by your side enough to know your character weakness and such things (those things your character usually don't share).

Knowing that, you can easily understand and accept better why some "groups" are closed and some others more open. You can also understand why you can be closer to some people than others and why you will sometimes only be a buddy and sometimes be something more.
What is important is to find the right people having the same vision of the RP and some similar schedule, those people probably know some more people like you if they are there since long enough and seek for some, etc. That's how you enter in a circle which fit you and not that vast idea of a "community" that I don't share at all, because of what I just explained.

Aris · **04-07-2015, 04:38 PM**

A little irrelevant but, thanks to all the encouraging replies & advice in this thread, I bit the bullet and joined in with some random folk roleplaying. They didn't seem to mind and it was super fun. I'll stick to similar light encounters for now while I build my confidence, and am very excited for whatever the RPing future may bring. Tongue

Cymakara · **04-07-2015, 04:42 PM**

(04-07-2015, 04:38 PM)Aris Wrote: A little irrelevant but, thanks to all the encouraging replies & advice in this thread, I bit the bullet and joined in with some random folk roleplaying. They didn't seem to mind and it was super fun. I'll stick to similar light encounters for now while I build my confidence, and am very excited for whatever the RPing future may bring.

My approaches have had the opposite effect, sadly xD Most people I found RPing did so in Partychat/linkshellchat/something I couldn't see. Thankfully, a certain couple people have been talking to me on Skype and we've got some RP to happen. I can happily say William's had luck so far :3

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