(03-27-2015, 09:27 AM)Warren Castille Wrote: and then began writing an extremely brooding solo thread.I did much the same as Warren - except that I never made my own introduction thread, I actually piggy-backed on someone else because I was a little nervous about it myself. So, I actually have no introduction or welcome thread of my own on this forum!Â
My first real effort to meet anyone on the RPC was just to start an RP thread that invited interaction. It wasn't a great success, I only met one person via it, but C'kayah has turned out to be one of the most important individuals in Aya's life so I cannot say it was unsuccessful
But, I guess what I am trying to say, is that this also was not the gateway to meeting other people, but it did help.
I want to be clear that I'm not suggesting people hang out in the QS to find RP. That is one option among many! Social interactions can be started anywhere. Other events, by specifically reaching out to people you see posting on the RPC and find interesting, by just walking about town or residential districts and talking to people you see about. There was a terrific suggestion about putting yourself out there to hire someone for some job or activity, a terrific take on the same idea.
Two people can both sit there posting receptive-to-RP emotes for hours on end, and no RP interaction will occur. One of them, in the end, must be willing to do what they both do not want to do: cold approach the other. I am not suggesting that this is easy, not at all. It really isn't easy, especially at first. I have probably done more cold approaches than anyone else in this particular community, and I still get nervous, I still get rejected, I still get treated rudely, and I still get shot down. The only difference is that I have the experience with this community to know that it does pay off to be optimistic and persistent. If you keep going you will find people who are receptive.
That's because there are dozens, if not hundreds, of people out there just like you. Looking for RP, wanting to RP, wanting to meet people. They're afraid to approach you, you're afraid to approach them, but once one of you breaks the ice there's the potential for fun, and the potential for friendship.
It is not the only way. But it is the most tried, and it is the most true. It is the most efficient, and it is probably the best. You can poke around the RPC, you can join an FC, try to join an LS, or you can just hope that someone you would like to meet comes your way to meet you. It may happen. You may get lucky.Â
I know that I do my best to meet new people, to point them toward potential friends, to break the ice and just try to make them comfortable. I know that I am not alone in this, there are people out there trying to make people lucky. But, if the question is: what can new RPers do to make new connections? There's only one good answer. They may not like it, but that's the way it is. I'm sorry.
I realize that we've been repeating this mantra, but that's just because it really is the key to success in making contacts. You can hold your breath until you're blue in the face, you can tell us that it worked because we were popular (while forgetting that all of us show up here initially either entirely or mostly bereft of friends and contacts). You can accuse us of holding up a giant middle-finger to those we're trying to help (seriously Kellach?) But you're all missing the point: we're offering our very best advice, based upon our own experience, the experience of others we know, and a basic understanding of social interaction.
If you don't like that message, I'm sorry, but please don't shoot the messengers.
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