I'm gonna take everyone's side, and echo what a lot of others have already said, because I honestly believe everyone is right (as contradicting as that may be)
Being a New Rper is hard: Being a new rper is VERY hard. You get a taste of how glorious rp can be, you want more, you see everyone else enjoying rp, and you try to get more involved yourself, only there is a toolset and a subtle skill to getting involved, and no one is taking the time to show you how to do it. So you start to feel lost, frustrated, and yes, hurt. Like any hobby or job... it is possible to learn on your own, but it becomes so much easier if you have a mentor or tutor to learn off of. Unfortunately, those can be hard to come by.
Cliques exist/cliques are bad: Cliques do exist, and cliques are bad. Why? They damage the growth of other rpers. I am reminded of a guild I was an officer in. Whenever I am an officer, I seem to fall into 'official welcoming/intro rp' person. Which is fine. It's something I enjoy doing, and I strongly feel if you are going to invite someone into your guild story, then why aren't you taking the time to make sure they know how to apply themselves? I've never understand the rather blase attitude of 'figure it out yourself' or 'I'm not here to hold hands'.
Anywho, as said officer, I got a group of 5 or 6 people to welcome a new recruit, and run a scene that had the recruit so excited, so incredibly OOC grateful, that they talked about it all night! Mission accomplished, right?
Well, when I tried to run a similar scene for a new recruit a week later, and asked others to join in, that very same person asked; 'Why?' Many rpers, sadly... tend to be less than welcoming once they have found their 'clique'.
Cliques exist/cliques are good: I told you I was going to be contradictory
Cliques do exist, and cliques are good. Be honest. You're a new rper. What do you want more than anything? A group to call your own, right? And when you find said group, I'm willing to bet you'll be hard pressed to include everyone into your roleplay, due to the simple fact of real life time constraints. Doesn't make you a bad person if you 'forget your roots'. You aren't a bad person if you are 'popular'. It simply means you are human, and can only accomplish so much in the twenty-four hours of the day alloted to us. You'd be surprised how many people do care about helping others... but often find themselves short on time.
Character Matters: As others have noted.... your character matters! A lot of rpers come from small dnd groups, where no matter WHO your character is, the other party members are forced to rp with them. This is not the case in MMO rp. If my character doesn't like yours, they don't have to hang out with you at all! They have CHOICE. And as others have stated... the popular characters tend to be the ones who can handle a variety of different social situations; they are outgoing, charismatic, like strangers, like people and conversation, like to have fun! In MMO these characters work, because you, the individual are responsible for finding your own rp, you are not going to be led along by a DM. So if your character is shy, or socially awkward, they are going to have a harder go of it. They are going to find conversations with people, then never meet again.
Generally, I try to play a socially outgoing character initially, and once I have formed some friendships, experiment more on my alts, as I can then more easier set up rp based on the OOC connections I've made. Even so, I still have alts I struggle to find rp on, due to their innate nature.
If you do plan to play someone shyer, I suggest trying to find an FC or active LS quickly. But it'll still require a little bit more work on your part OOCly to get your character established.
New Rpers tend to blur IC/OOC: Frankly, so do older rpers from time to time. But part of the process of learning to RP is learning to clearly delineate those lines. There's a thought process I see many new rpers go through, which goes something like this: 'I am disliked/ignored ICly, that must mean I am disliked/ignored OOCly.'
As the example used in my Bad Cliques, this is actually sometimes the case. And it sucks. It happens in a fantasy rp world, just as it happens in real life. Just because we all share the same hobby, doesn't mean everyone is nice and inclusive about it :/
But sometimes, it is not the case at all! I have joined a few FC's and LS's, where I absolutely loved the people, but just did not feel I fit in an IC sense. I could not find RP for my character, and they were universally passed over by people in favor of other, more established friends. Yet we still got along just fine OOCly. You cannot, as a creator, writer, and rper, take it personally if your character feels flawed or failed. Use it as a learning tool for when you make the next character. Or reinvent them. Or, keep them just as they are and dig deeper into the community to find the place that feels like home for you. It's not always easy. Which brings me back to:
Being a new RPer is hard: Seriously. There is so much subtle nuance to learn, and oftentimes feels as if the community doesn't care. I've been there. But there are those amongst us who do care, would like to try to help, but we need to know how to help before we can properly direct you.
I also wonder, sometimes, if the people in Making Connections ever seek each other out? So many times I'll see someone post a thread, then another person post a thread right above them, and their character descriptions seem made for each other, yet a week later, they bump, still looking for rp, still frustrated. There are people in Making Connections just like you, there SPECIFICALLY to find new rpers to rp with, so do your due diligence and reach out to them.
It's not guaranteed to always work, but it's a foot in the door. Don't feel bad if you feel the 'popular crowd' doesn't have time for you, instead, go out and make a popular crowd of your own.
In summation, my character Claire is specifically tailored for meeting and greeting new folks, and I've tried to reach out to several on these forums, and would be more than happy to arrange a time to ICly meet if you reach out to me.
tl;dr: persevere! Rp can be very rewarding!
Being a New Rper is hard: Being a new rper is VERY hard. You get a taste of how glorious rp can be, you want more, you see everyone else enjoying rp, and you try to get more involved yourself, only there is a toolset and a subtle skill to getting involved, and no one is taking the time to show you how to do it. So you start to feel lost, frustrated, and yes, hurt. Like any hobby or job... it is possible to learn on your own, but it becomes so much easier if you have a mentor or tutor to learn off of. Unfortunately, those can be hard to come by.
Cliques exist/cliques are bad: Cliques do exist, and cliques are bad. Why? They damage the growth of other rpers. I am reminded of a guild I was an officer in. Whenever I am an officer, I seem to fall into 'official welcoming/intro rp' person. Which is fine. It's something I enjoy doing, and I strongly feel if you are going to invite someone into your guild story, then why aren't you taking the time to make sure they know how to apply themselves? I've never understand the rather blase attitude of 'figure it out yourself' or 'I'm not here to hold hands'.
Anywho, as said officer, I got a group of 5 or 6 people to welcome a new recruit, and run a scene that had the recruit so excited, so incredibly OOC grateful, that they talked about it all night! Mission accomplished, right?
Well, when I tried to run a similar scene for a new recruit a week later, and asked others to join in, that very same person asked; 'Why?' Many rpers, sadly... tend to be less than welcoming once they have found their 'clique'.
Cliques exist/cliques are good: I told you I was going to be contradictory
Cliques do exist, and cliques are good. Be honest. You're a new rper. What do you want more than anything? A group to call your own, right? And when you find said group, I'm willing to bet you'll be hard pressed to include everyone into your roleplay, due to the simple fact of real life time constraints. Doesn't make you a bad person if you 'forget your roots'. You aren't a bad person if you are 'popular'. It simply means you are human, and can only accomplish so much in the twenty-four hours of the day alloted to us. You'd be surprised how many people do care about helping others... but often find themselves short on time.
Character Matters: As others have noted.... your character matters! A lot of rpers come from small dnd groups, where no matter WHO your character is, the other party members are forced to rp with them. This is not the case in MMO rp. If my character doesn't like yours, they don't have to hang out with you at all! They have CHOICE. And as others have stated... the popular characters tend to be the ones who can handle a variety of different social situations; they are outgoing, charismatic, like strangers, like people and conversation, like to have fun! In MMO these characters work, because you, the individual are responsible for finding your own rp, you are not going to be led along by a DM. So if your character is shy, or socially awkward, they are going to have a harder go of it. They are going to find conversations with people, then never meet again.
Generally, I try to play a socially outgoing character initially, and once I have formed some friendships, experiment more on my alts, as I can then more easier set up rp based on the OOC connections I've made. Even so, I still have alts I struggle to find rp on, due to their innate nature.
If you do plan to play someone shyer, I suggest trying to find an FC or active LS quickly. But it'll still require a little bit more work on your part OOCly to get your character established.
New Rpers tend to blur IC/OOC: Frankly, so do older rpers from time to time. But part of the process of learning to RP is learning to clearly delineate those lines. There's a thought process I see many new rpers go through, which goes something like this: 'I am disliked/ignored ICly, that must mean I am disliked/ignored OOCly.'
As the example used in my Bad Cliques, this is actually sometimes the case. And it sucks. It happens in a fantasy rp world, just as it happens in real life. Just because we all share the same hobby, doesn't mean everyone is nice and inclusive about it :/
But sometimes, it is not the case at all! I have joined a few FC's and LS's, where I absolutely loved the people, but just did not feel I fit in an IC sense. I could not find RP for my character, and they were universally passed over by people in favor of other, more established friends. Yet we still got along just fine OOCly. You cannot, as a creator, writer, and rper, take it personally if your character feels flawed or failed. Use it as a learning tool for when you make the next character. Or reinvent them. Or, keep them just as they are and dig deeper into the community to find the place that feels like home for you. It's not always easy. Which brings me back to:
Being a new RPer is hard: Seriously. There is so much subtle nuance to learn, and oftentimes feels as if the community doesn't care. I've been there. But there are those amongst us who do care, would like to try to help, but we need to know how to help before we can properly direct you.
I also wonder, sometimes, if the people in Making Connections ever seek each other out? So many times I'll see someone post a thread, then another person post a thread right above them, and their character descriptions seem made for each other, yet a week later, they bump, still looking for rp, still frustrated. There are people in Making Connections just like you, there SPECIFICALLY to find new rpers to rp with, so do your due diligence and reach out to them.
It's not guaranteed to always work, but it's a foot in the door. Don't feel bad if you feel the 'popular crowd' doesn't have time for you, instead, go out and make a popular crowd of your own.
In summation, my character Claire is specifically tailored for meeting and greeting new folks, and I've tried to reach out to several on these forums, and would be more than happy to arrange a time to ICly meet if you reach out to me.
tl;dr: persevere! Rp can be very rewarding!
