Dasair, I think you're entirely correct. What people are mis-attributing to popularity is actually just recognizability on the forum. The idea that there's some division, some difference between how those who are recognized from the forum find and conduct RP, and those who are new or less recognized, is just plain wrong. There's an entire portfolio of myth and projection that gets repeated over and over again about this very topic: my suggestion is just realizing that everyone you interact with in this community is just like you, faces many of the same struggles and has many of the same concerns and desires in terms of finding and enjoying RP.
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