((Raniall used with permission.))
Ceilia's earlierst memories were not of family or toys; of those she had none. No, they were studies in magic and healing. From the moment she woke up her day began. She had her chores which taught her to care for herself and how to be a good, obedient wife some day and she had her medical lessons, building on her natural healing skills. Mistakes were not tolerated. Failure at her lessons meant beatings. She had to be better than competent; she had to be perfect. Nothing less was tolerated. This failure today... failure on a subject she had been drilled on. Failing to take action that would have been required to save a man's life... it would have meant her execution.
The sandy gravel crunched under her feet as she strode onward, as aimless as her thoughts.
The waters of her mind churned as thoughts, like spooked fish, flitted in and out of the shadows. 'I have failed. I am a healer and I have failed to safeguard a man's life. This is what I was trained for... My entire life has been spent tending to others, healing them. If I cannot recognize a man in need of medical attention then... then what good am I? What is left for me to do? What is my purpose? Where do I belong?'
Her eye, starting to well with tears again, swept across the black horizon. Suddenly, her surroundings seemed alien and strange to her. Her birthplace, so far away, was no home. And Ul'dah, once growing comfortable, now strange and threatening with the recent upheaval. Her current "family", such as it was, had left for Miss Oruissi's house in Gridania, but was that even home? The Master was little better than those who raised her and Miss Oruissi partnered with him. As for Gridania itself, she wasn't sure she could face the green boughs and conjurers of Gridania again after her recent failure as a healer. Kind as they were, she was not one of them, either.
And what of her love? She came to a halt as her thoughts crossed over him and guilt surged anew. In her distress, she'd left him where he'd fallen asleep, exhausted from his fights, surrounded by those still lingering after the tourney.
'Oh no! I have left him there! Idiot! Imbecile! You are useless! You are supposed to protect him and you are worthless as a healer and now as a lover. You have gone and left him alone! You idiot! You are no good to anyone!'
Her stomach twisted as the voices of the past came back, mocking her as she berated herself. She stood, swaying, indecisive a long moment. To continue on, lost? To collapse here and cry, giving in to the weight of her loss? Or, return to her duties and perform them until she could be relieved of them?
'...I cannot leave him alone. If I walk away, I have completely failed him. If I stay, then at least it is something until I can find someone better to take my place.'
Shivering, she turned then, and made her way across the alien landscape, back to where she'd left him. It was with relief that she saw he was still there, by the camp just outside of Ul'dah, blissfully snoring beneath the tree he'd fallen asleep under.
Quietly she slipped over to him, kneeling on the ground beside him. "Rani... Rani wake up." Her fingers lightly brushed his cheek.
Her only response was his gentle snore. Of course, it would take a herd of buffalo stampeding across his head to wake him. He was a soldier, though, and she knew one way to get a soldier's attention.
She moved a little away from him to give him room. "Sergeant Lightstone."
"Yessir!" Raniall sat up abruptly, peering around into the gloom with bleary eyes.
"Rani, it's me. You've fallen asleep," she said softly. "We need to get you to bed."
"Oh..? Right... right. What time is it?" He stood up groggily, only half awake.
"Near morning. You should get back to the barracks."
He took a moment, ensuring his armor and weapon were still with him, then squinting, bleary-eyed into the darkness, his blue eyes briefly passing over the campfire at the encampment. With a grunt, he nodded, then took her hand, leading her back towards the city.
"You enjoy yourself today?" he asked, making casual conversation.
"Mhm." She softly vocalized, nodding as she watched her footing.
Raniall stretched his arms out, the leather in his armor creaking. "Good." He looked towards her, grinning. "I'm glad. I think I might do it again."Â
She merely nodded, continuing to watch the ground in silence as he rambled on about the excitement of the day and his future plans for Grindstone conquest.Â
The walk seemed to drag on forever and she was grateful when they finally arrived at the barracks.
Raniall turned to face her, taking her hands in his. She no longer had an excuse to avoid his gaze and her eyes met his. Instantly, he knew something was wrong; his smile turned to concern.
"Ceilia? Are you all right?"
She nodded. "I am just tired."
She was a horrible liar and both knew it, but Raniall decided to let it slide for now. He took a moment before responding. "You should go home and get some sleep, then." His fingers gently lifted her chin. "And you know where to find me if you need me, love, right?"
Ceilia nodded again. "I... I know, love. I should go home and sleep."
The Flamesworn wrapped his arms around her, pulling her close. He rested his head on hers, taking in her scent and warmth, reluctant to let her go. "I love you." He whispered, just loud enough for her to hear.
Her stomach clenched as he held her, the comfort she usually found in his arms warring with her loss of purpose. She squeezed him in response, biting her tongue to force herself to keep her composure. "I... I love you, too, Raniall."
He squeezed again, then relaxed, releasing her. Holding her hands in his again, he smiled, though worry was still evident. "Stay safe, love."
"I-I will." She tried to smile up at him. "You, as well... love." The word was so difficult to say when she expected to be leaving for good. She didn't know, yet, though; everything was a jumble in her head.
"I... I must go b-before Miss O-Oruissi finds me missing." An excuse, but the truth, as well. Raniall nodded as Ceilia forced a smile, squeezed his hands, then hurried away.
Brow furrowed with worry, Raniall watched her until she disappeared from view before making his way inside.
Ceilia's earlierst memories were not of family or toys; of those she had none. No, they were studies in magic and healing. From the moment she woke up her day began. She had her chores which taught her to care for herself and how to be a good, obedient wife some day and she had her medical lessons, building on her natural healing skills. Mistakes were not tolerated. Failure at her lessons meant beatings. She had to be better than competent; she had to be perfect. Nothing less was tolerated. This failure today... failure on a subject she had been drilled on. Failing to take action that would have been required to save a man's life... it would have meant her execution.
The sandy gravel crunched under her feet as she strode onward, as aimless as her thoughts.
The waters of her mind churned as thoughts, like spooked fish, flitted in and out of the shadows. 'I have failed. I am a healer and I have failed to safeguard a man's life. This is what I was trained for... My entire life has been spent tending to others, healing them. If I cannot recognize a man in need of medical attention then... then what good am I? What is left for me to do? What is my purpose? Where do I belong?'
Her eye, starting to well with tears again, swept across the black horizon. Suddenly, her surroundings seemed alien and strange to her. Her birthplace, so far away, was no home. And Ul'dah, once growing comfortable, now strange and threatening with the recent upheaval. Her current "family", such as it was, had left for Miss Oruissi's house in Gridania, but was that even home? The Master was little better than those who raised her and Miss Oruissi partnered with him. As for Gridania itself, she wasn't sure she could face the green boughs and conjurers of Gridania again after her recent failure as a healer. Kind as they were, she was not one of them, either.
And what of her love? She came to a halt as her thoughts crossed over him and guilt surged anew. In her distress, she'd left him where he'd fallen asleep, exhausted from his fights, surrounded by those still lingering after the tourney.
'Oh no! I have left him there! Idiot! Imbecile! You are useless! You are supposed to protect him and you are worthless as a healer and now as a lover. You have gone and left him alone! You idiot! You are no good to anyone!'
Her stomach twisted as the voices of the past came back, mocking her as she berated herself. She stood, swaying, indecisive a long moment. To continue on, lost? To collapse here and cry, giving in to the weight of her loss? Or, return to her duties and perform them until she could be relieved of them?
'...I cannot leave him alone. If I walk away, I have completely failed him. If I stay, then at least it is something until I can find someone better to take my place.'
Shivering, she turned then, and made her way across the alien landscape, back to where she'd left him. It was with relief that she saw he was still there, by the camp just outside of Ul'dah, blissfully snoring beneath the tree he'd fallen asleep under.
Quietly she slipped over to him, kneeling on the ground beside him. "Rani... Rani wake up." Her fingers lightly brushed his cheek.
Her only response was his gentle snore. Of course, it would take a herd of buffalo stampeding across his head to wake him. He was a soldier, though, and she knew one way to get a soldier's attention.
She moved a little away from him to give him room. "Sergeant Lightstone."
"Yessir!" Raniall sat up abruptly, peering around into the gloom with bleary eyes.
"Rani, it's me. You've fallen asleep," she said softly. "We need to get you to bed."
"Oh..? Right... right. What time is it?" He stood up groggily, only half awake.
"Near morning. You should get back to the barracks."
He took a moment, ensuring his armor and weapon were still with him, then squinting, bleary-eyed into the darkness, his blue eyes briefly passing over the campfire at the encampment. With a grunt, he nodded, then took her hand, leading her back towards the city.
"You enjoy yourself today?" he asked, making casual conversation.
"Mhm." She softly vocalized, nodding as she watched her footing.
Raniall stretched his arms out, the leather in his armor creaking. "Good." He looked towards her, grinning. "I'm glad. I think I might do it again."Â
She merely nodded, continuing to watch the ground in silence as he rambled on about the excitement of the day and his future plans for Grindstone conquest.Â
The walk seemed to drag on forever and she was grateful when they finally arrived at the barracks.
Raniall turned to face her, taking her hands in his. She no longer had an excuse to avoid his gaze and her eyes met his. Instantly, he knew something was wrong; his smile turned to concern.
"Ceilia? Are you all right?"
She nodded. "I am just tired."
She was a horrible liar and both knew it, but Raniall decided to let it slide for now. He took a moment before responding. "You should go home and get some sleep, then." His fingers gently lifted her chin. "And you know where to find me if you need me, love, right?"
Ceilia nodded again. "I... I know, love. I should go home and sleep."
The Flamesworn wrapped his arms around her, pulling her close. He rested his head on hers, taking in her scent and warmth, reluctant to let her go. "I love you." He whispered, just loud enough for her to hear.
Her stomach clenched as he held her, the comfort she usually found in his arms warring with her loss of purpose. She squeezed him in response, biting her tongue to force herself to keep her composure. "I... I love you, too, Raniall."
He squeezed again, then relaxed, releasing her. Holding her hands in his again, he smiled, though worry was still evident. "Stay safe, love."
"I-I will." She tried to smile up at him. "You, as well... love." The word was so difficult to say when she expected to be leaving for good. She didn't know, yet, though; everything was a jumble in her head.
"I... I must go b-before Miss O-Oruissi finds me missing." An excuse, but the truth, as well. Raniall nodded as Ceilia forced a smile, squeezed his hands, then hurried away.
Brow furrowed with worry, Raniall watched her until she disappeared from view before making his way inside.
Rhianna Oruissi
Order of the Raven's Eye
Order of the Raven's Eye
Quote:Rhianna Oruissi slips a cupcake into Nylesa Tou's pocket.
Nylesa Tou >> why you sneaky baker...
