Soaked through with rain, her long dress sopping and half-translucent from wetness, Annunu burst into the Duskbreak and bolted across the living room. She fell, hands and knees, in front of the fireplace; it was warm outside, a summer evening in the desert, but someone had laid a fire on the hearth anyway, and An nearly stuck her head inside, pressing her face up greedily to the flames. They crackled, heat and light burning off of her face and forehead, and she withdrew, concerned about singeing for her eyebrows and long eyelashes. Shivering despite the fire's heat, she drew her knees up to her chest.
He had called her a whore, among many other insults. Like all of them, they had been framed to insult her, and seem plausible. A weaker woman would fall before them. An had never felt less weak in her life. Grimly, her hand moved to her chest, in the same movement as earlier, and she fished into her bodice for the hidden pocket, retrieving the Nymian-inscribed ring he'd given her. It wasn't enough to look at it. She pressed it to her forehead, leaning toward the flames again. Her cheek smart, the red lines visible. But probably not enough. She dug her own fingers into them, emphasizing them, adding bruising.
She and Master Gogonji had agreed. It was advantageous to argue, to be seen to separate. To make herself vulnerable. So they had fought, publicly and in full view of at least three of Rosewater's eyes-and-ears, and An had hurled every insult she could imagine at him, as he had at her. It had been rational, in the cold way that they both could be rational; heated, in the way that both of them could be when they were threatened. When she had insulted Chachanji, she had seen actual anger in his eyes. Or had it been pain? She mouthed "I'm sorry" to herself, but it meant nothing. They were cut off from one another. They had cut themselves off.
She was cut off.
Rosewater! Her teeth clenched until they ground, and she dropped the ring from her face. He was to blame for this, for all of this. If Master Gogonji's words had caused her pain - if hers had hurt him - Rosewater's hand was the one that had lashed out at them. Rosewater's hand was the one that hit her, not Master Gogonji's. All of this was Rosewater's fault. How dare he harry them to this point, yoke her, wrap his accursed device around her neck?! It was his fault, and his alone! Hate as intense as fire, as cold as ice, roared up within her, and she started to her feet without thinking.
Soon. She gulped air, forcing herself back to calm. Soon, Rosewater would be brought low. Soon, he would be dragged before Master Gogonji for his punishment. This was simply another few logs to add to the fire that would devour him. Green logs that would take longer to burn. She let a smile cross her face at that prospect, content in the safety of the Duskbreak to express her true feelings, and her fingers tightened on the ring until the unforgiving metal bit into her flesh.
A bell or two at the most. Time to cry, and wipe it away poorly, and go back to Rosewater a woman defeated. A woman with no one else left. He would be expecting her, even if he hadn't formally summoned her yet. A bell or two to be An again, and then Annunu Nunu would have to come out. But she was surprised at the guilt she felt, even with the memory of his hand on her face, of the things he'd said. But he promised.
They were all lies. They had promised each other. All lies.
I'm so sorry.
*********
Rosewater's foot came down casually, pinning the Ironworks engineer's wrist to the stone floor. A few of his most trusted men were watching the door. No one had had to be made an example of - yet. That was the best way. Bodies meant more paperwork. And he'd gotten the girl to avoid paperwork, among other reasons.
"So you're sure the Lalafell girl came in here the other day just to buy a comms device?" he asked in a bored voice, his arms crossed in front of his tabard. "You aren't misremembering?"
One engineer sat off to the side, groaning, his arms wrapped around himself; another stood in abject terror, almost unable to move, three swords pointed at his gut. The one beneath Rosewater squirmed, her breath coming in panicked gasps. She'd have been cute, he thought idly, if she weren't a brainiac know-it-all. They all were, these types. He hated people who got above their station. He hated it when people didn't know their place.
"I swear, just a - please! Let me go!"
"Because if she asked for something else - well, you don't need hands to live, now do you, girl? I'm not so cruel as to hurt a lady's FACE." He grinned, leaning down toward her, his foot pressing her wrist down painfully into the floor with the full weight of his foot. She howled, her feet beating a tattoo against the floor.
"Alright - ALRIGHT! She wanted a jamming signal device for a - for a mechanism around her throat -"
He listened, amused, as she spilled all. They always did, in the end. It wasn't like this was hard. Rosewater wasn't much of a man of science, but he liked physics. Physics meant that a little pressure in the right place gave you what you wanted.
"Was that so hard?" he asked gently - then brought the heel of his armored foot against the most tender part of her wrist. The crunching sound that immediately resulted sounded like snapping twigs in a dry winter. He congratulated himself on that mental analogy as he turned away.
"Bring Annunu to me tonight, late. My bedroom." Physics were useful for more than one thing.
He had called her a whore, among many other insults. Like all of them, they had been framed to insult her, and seem plausible. A weaker woman would fall before them. An had never felt less weak in her life. Grimly, her hand moved to her chest, in the same movement as earlier, and she fished into her bodice for the hidden pocket, retrieving the Nymian-inscribed ring he'd given her. It wasn't enough to look at it. She pressed it to her forehead, leaning toward the flames again. Her cheek smart, the red lines visible. But probably not enough. She dug her own fingers into them, emphasizing them, adding bruising.
She and Master Gogonji had agreed. It was advantageous to argue, to be seen to separate. To make herself vulnerable. So they had fought, publicly and in full view of at least three of Rosewater's eyes-and-ears, and An had hurled every insult she could imagine at him, as he had at her. It had been rational, in the cold way that they both could be rational; heated, in the way that both of them could be when they were threatened. When she had insulted Chachanji, she had seen actual anger in his eyes. Or had it been pain? She mouthed "I'm sorry" to herself, but it meant nothing. They were cut off from one another. They had cut themselves off.
She was cut off.
Rosewater! Her teeth clenched until they ground, and she dropped the ring from her face. He was to blame for this, for all of this. If Master Gogonji's words had caused her pain - if hers had hurt him - Rosewater's hand was the one that had lashed out at them. Rosewater's hand was the one that hit her, not Master Gogonji's. All of this was Rosewater's fault. How dare he harry them to this point, yoke her, wrap his accursed device around her neck?! It was his fault, and his alone! Hate as intense as fire, as cold as ice, roared up within her, and she started to her feet without thinking.
Soon. She gulped air, forcing herself back to calm. Soon, Rosewater would be brought low. Soon, he would be dragged before Master Gogonji for his punishment. This was simply another few logs to add to the fire that would devour him. Green logs that would take longer to burn. She let a smile cross her face at that prospect, content in the safety of the Duskbreak to express her true feelings, and her fingers tightened on the ring until the unforgiving metal bit into her flesh.
A bell or two at the most. Time to cry, and wipe it away poorly, and go back to Rosewater a woman defeated. A woman with no one else left. He would be expecting her, even if he hadn't formally summoned her yet. A bell or two to be An again, and then Annunu Nunu would have to come out. But she was surprised at the guilt she felt, even with the memory of his hand on her face, of the things he'd said. But he promised.
They were all lies. They had promised each other. All lies.
I'm so sorry.
*********
Rosewater's foot came down casually, pinning the Ironworks engineer's wrist to the stone floor. A few of his most trusted men were watching the door. No one had had to be made an example of - yet. That was the best way. Bodies meant more paperwork. And he'd gotten the girl to avoid paperwork, among other reasons.
"So you're sure the Lalafell girl came in here the other day just to buy a comms device?" he asked in a bored voice, his arms crossed in front of his tabard. "You aren't misremembering?"
One engineer sat off to the side, groaning, his arms wrapped around himself; another stood in abject terror, almost unable to move, three swords pointed at his gut. The one beneath Rosewater squirmed, her breath coming in panicked gasps. She'd have been cute, he thought idly, if she weren't a brainiac know-it-all. They all were, these types. He hated people who got above their station. He hated it when people didn't know their place.
"I swear, just a - please! Let me go!"
"Because if she asked for something else - well, you don't need hands to live, now do you, girl? I'm not so cruel as to hurt a lady's FACE." He grinned, leaning down toward her, his foot pressing her wrist down painfully into the floor with the full weight of his foot. She howled, her feet beating a tattoo against the floor.
"Alright - ALRIGHT! She wanted a jamming signal device for a - for a mechanism around her throat -"
He listened, amused, as she spilled all. They always did, in the end. It wasn't like this was hard. Rosewater wasn't much of a man of science, but he liked physics. Physics meant that a little pressure in the right place gave you what you wanted.
"Was that so hard?" he asked gently - then brought the heel of his armored foot against the most tender part of her wrist. The crunching sound that immediately resulted sounded like snapping twigs in a dry winter. He congratulated himself on that mental analogy as he turned away.
"Bring Annunu to me tonight, late. My bedroom." Physics were useful for more than one thing.
People have forgotten this truth. But you mustn't forget it. You become responsible forever for what you have tamed.
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