19th Sun of the 5th Umbral Moon
![[Image: tumblr_inline_of9rogFhem1srsccc_540.png]](https://66.media.tumblr.com/d3371b44b6cea5896f5a9e3ee88d5e8a/tumblr_inline_of9rogFhem1srsccc_540.png)
The last moon has been supremely difficult to navigate. I am aware that the bombing investigations reached their conclusion, but of which conclusion I am uncertain. Only that the Maelstrom have ceased to request assistance.
I should dearly like to poke my nose in, my dear journal, only I have been quite incapacitated for the entire time.
Kaito took me on a test, of sorts. I am still uncertain as to whether passing it is something I ought to be pleased with or not. In so doing, I almost lost my leg. And I gained something that is the source of my confusion.
A crystal. He said it contains the memories of those before me, and it seems he was correct. He also suggested it would help me control my more murderous intentions towards others I dislike.
So far, it has had the opposite of that latter effect.
I am simultaneously considering whether participating in Fight Club might help abate these sensations, and wondering whether the risk that I might forget my surroundings and kill my unsuspecting opponent - the reason I have yet to participate - is greater than ever.
Perhaps I should ask a friend to spar with me instead…
At least, as Kaito said, I am aware of the malicious intent of the part of myself it enhances. And at least I am slowly capable of returning to my previous hobbies… I have missed swimming. The injury on my leg has scaled over sufficiently that I was able to do so for the first time in over a moon, the other night, and although more exhausting than I had remembered… it was pleasant.
Everything is so difficult to keep track of, even within my own mind. I feel as though writing it down ought to help, but it has slipped my routine even to do that much. I should likely correct this mistake.
