“That should be a simple question, should it not?†Kasrjin said wryly. Karadwyr chirped tersely, as if in agreement. He patted the bag where he had placed the keystone. “I should be. Yet in the end, it is only duty that compels me to return this.†He saw flashes of the scenery every time he closed his eyes, every time he blinked: a pitch black stone altar, the chains being wrapped around his chest, the burning characters of the Correspondence carved into the ceiling above.
His hand was held over the keystone. A hemisphere was an odd shape, and there was a nagging doubt in the back of his mind, one he dare not indulge. What if this wasn’t truly what was needed? What if it was incomplete? It would be back to square one, and Ehs Daih would not permit them again.
Questions upon questions. Memory upon memory. It still gave him a headache just to think about it.
“Yes, I can return home, but I am unsure if I will be able to find my place among them again,†he murmured more to himself than to Roen. He tilted his head towards her. “Why did you come with me?â€
That made the paladin turn where she laid. She propped one cheek against her hand as she eyed the Au Ra who was seated against a trunk of a tree, at his ever vigilant station. She wore an open frown at his last revelation, but it slowly twisted into an expression of careful consideration.
“Many reasons,†she admitted. “I… I was hiding, in Coerthas, when I found you and Edda. I had no direction… no purpose, really. Then in helping both of you, it felt like there was some semblance of a choice that I can make for myself. Rather than trying to drown my suns with tasks that were assigned to me, I saw that I could choose to help you both.â€
Roen took a deep breath in. “Then… as I got to know you…†Her voice quieted to a murmur. “I came to trust you and admire you. There were many things about you that I found… endearing.†She turned onto her back again, diverting her gaze to the heavens above.
“Sometimes, some things just feel like the right thing to do. When your instincts, your mind, and your heart tell you that it is the right path to choose.†She stared up at the moon above. “And... that was you. I had not felt such a pull in a long time.â€
There was a pause. “Surely, you have felt something like that before.â€
“I admit that I have not,†Kasrjin said. “Or if I did...I do not remember it.†He did not know how to express it. The right path? He was Khadai because his of his aptitude and inclinations. It wasn’t a “right path†or a purpose, it was a responsibility and a duty. A function. “Perhaps there was a time where mind and purpose were singular, but...rare for people to feel satisfied in such a rigidly locked path.†Was it? He did not truly know. Kasrjin knew he was apt to parrot the wisdom of the Tsenkhai, but for the first time he found himself in doubt.
“I have never had such certainty direct my actions,†the Xaela said, looking up at the veil of the night sky. “It has always been practicality, or instinct, or the command of a superior.†His emerald gaze directed themselves at her. “Though, I do not regret the effects of our virtues on you. I believe it has improved you for the better.â€
He sighed, the cool air revealing his breath as a tenuous puff. “I do not know if I will be able to stay among my people if--when I return, or even if I should. At the least, I am provided with some measure of comfort that a familiar face will be available if circumstances demand that I reside in Eorzea.â€
His hand was held over the keystone. A hemisphere was an odd shape, and there was a nagging doubt in the back of his mind, one he dare not indulge. What if this wasn’t truly what was needed? What if it was incomplete? It would be back to square one, and Ehs Daih would not permit them again.
Questions upon questions. Memory upon memory. It still gave him a headache just to think about it.
“Yes, I can return home, but I am unsure if I will be able to find my place among them again,†he murmured more to himself than to Roen. He tilted his head towards her. “Why did you come with me?â€
That made the paladin turn where she laid. She propped one cheek against her hand as she eyed the Au Ra who was seated against a trunk of a tree, at his ever vigilant station. She wore an open frown at his last revelation, but it slowly twisted into an expression of careful consideration.
“Many reasons,†she admitted. “I… I was hiding, in Coerthas, when I found you and Edda. I had no direction… no purpose, really. Then in helping both of you, it felt like there was some semblance of a choice that I can make for myself. Rather than trying to drown my suns with tasks that were assigned to me, I saw that I could choose to help you both.â€
Roen took a deep breath in. “Then… as I got to know you…†Her voice quieted to a murmur. “I came to trust you and admire you. There were many things about you that I found… endearing.†She turned onto her back again, diverting her gaze to the heavens above.
“Sometimes, some things just feel like the right thing to do. When your instincts, your mind, and your heart tell you that it is the right path to choose.†She stared up at the moon above. “And... that was you. I had not felt such a pull in a long time.â€
There was a pause. “Surely, you have felt something like that before.â€
“I admit that I have not,†Kasrjin said. “Or if I did...I do not remember it.†He did not know how to express it. The right path? He was Khadai because his of his aptitude and inclinations. It wasn’t a “right path†or a purpose, it was a responsibility and a duty. A function. “Perhaps there was a time where mind and purpose were singular, but...rare for people to feel satisfied in such a rigidly locked path.†Was it? He did not truly know. Kasrjin knew he was apt to parrot the wisdom of the Tsenkhai, but for the first time he found himself in doubt.
“I have never had such certainty direct my actions,†the Xaela said, looking up at the veil of the night sky. “It has always been practicality, or instinct, or the command of a superior.†His emerald gaze directed themselves at her. “Though, I do not regret the effects of our virtues on you. I believe it has improved you for the better.â€
He sighed, the cool air revealing his breath as a tenuous puff. “I do not know if I will be able to stay among my people if--when I return, or even if I should. At the least, I am provided with some measure of comfort that a familiar face will be available if circumstances demand that I reside in Eorzea.â€
