"You mean the lot of 'em is dead?!"
"Uh, well, uh, I, sir its, all of them."
"That's impossible! How the hell do thirty healthy slaves all die in one night?"
Big Jug was, as his name implied, big. But he was a roe, not a jug. And he was mad as hell as he tried to process the reality that his auction meat that was supposed to make him his this moon's paycheck had just died on him. The giant chewed on his pipe angrily and his black beard shook in anger with his body.
"Looks like some sort of rot sir. None of the boys down below even want to get near them corpses." Squeaked Big Jug's number two: a small, lalafell female who's talent in business made up for her lack of physical prowess.
The two were standing by the door to the basement inside the small, Mist house. Â The small, friendly cottage with its many flower gardens outside, seemed unassuming enough to the unassuming eye. But it was tactically located. It's position relevant to the coast, as well its close proximity to other persons eager to trade in flesh and coin meant their little operation normally ran without a hitch.
Normally.
This was not normal. Thirty slaves was a lot of gil wasted and Big Jug had bills and employees to pay.
"Rot is not possible." Big Jug growled as he looked at the basement door and pictured the cells beneath his feet. "We keep that place too clean and feed them too we'll for this to-"
The door opened and the lalafell immediately went to the basement door and locked it as Big Jug spun.
The sight of the small, blond miqo'te that shut the door behind him didn't help Big Jug's mood. Not one bit
"I swear to the hells, Crate."  Big Jug began advancing on the small man. Crate eyed the massive Roe with a degree of apprehension but the blond miqo'te gave a mischievous smirk. "If you have anything to do with my problem..."
"Considering they're dead, you should be glad I'm here to buy." Crate replied with a shrug.
Big Jug roared as his suspicions were suddenly confirmed and he charged Crate.
The small miqo'te threw himself out of harm's way as Big Jug crushed the door to bits and went stumbling onto the lawn, his face red in anger and blood from the impact. Â
Crate picked himself up, dusted off his gilded robe and faced the ruined door.
"Tsk Tsk. First the slaves and now the door. How much damage am I going to cause you today?"
Crate..." Big Jug heaved heavy breaths as he shook, barely able to contain his rage. Â " You...you...you cost me..."
"Couple million at least based on your figures last year." Â Crate beamed and cooked his head. " But seeing as they are dead, and you need to make a profit, how bout you sell those cadavers to me! Standard discount of course."
"You killed them! No deal! Go to hell!" Big Jug snarled like a bull and cracked his knuckles. Â "I'll kill you"
"Big Jug, put your pride back in your pants with your dick and suck it up." Crate rolled his eyes. Â " I -own- your balls and you should be thrilled I even want to pay seeing as I could have just killed them, told the authorities about your fun little organization here, and -then- taken the corpses for free after they busted down your door and dragged you off. I, oh look a blue bird!"
The blond glanced at a flying speck of blue and locked his lips.
"Turnips, I could go for some blue bird stew right now. Just like my momma-""
"I should have snapped your neck years ago." Big Jug howled and stormed inside, with Crate quickly retreating and putting a large desk between them.
"Maybe you should have, but if you kill me now two things happen. One, no one buys the bodies"
"I can live with that," Big Jug added, shoving the desk aside.
"Andandand!" Crate stammered, reaching into his coat and pulling out a vile of water. Crate then began to bluff as hard as his poker face would let him. " You touch me, I drop this, and we all die of the same rot I infected your slaves with! You want to die pooping yourself to death, be my guest. Literally, you poop your own organs out. As well as your flesh rotting painfully."Â That wasn't -really- how the pox he had used worked but Crate figured his version sounded way less pleasant.
Big Jug paused and stopped.  He knew Crate, heck he had hired Crate for awhile, and while the blond male might have been bluffing, Big Jug wasn't eager to test out and see if the small miqo'te was. Big Jug had seen what sort of dangerous things Crate often hid in those ridiculously opulent robes of his.
The massive Roe heaved and shook but did not raise hands to kill.
"I think you are bluffing." Big Jug challenged. Â " I know you love being alive."
"Yeah, but you have no way of knowing if I stay dead." Crate bluffed back. " Very good skill, my art. Wanna test em?" He leveled his blue eyes right into the grey rocks that Big Jug used as eyes. Â Big Jug grunted, crackled his knuckles, and then backed down.
"Full price for them." Big Jug growled.
"Sod that. I have a discount."
"It's been revoked." Big Jug snorted. "You lucky I need them gone."
"Way to be a friend and a buddy" Crate pouted. Â "Half."
"Full." Jug snapped sternly. "You think I can't find some scientist or some other spell slinger to sell those corpses too?"
"Not safely and not before they rot and devalue even more." Crate retorted quickly. "Half"
Big Jug crossed his arms.
"Full. Final offer. You clearly need them more than me now."
Crate grumbled and sucked on his teeth. It was true. He needed the bodies now after all. Why he'd done all this in the first place. The short man had the gil, of course, but he was super annoyed that his plan to get those remains at a discount hadn't work. He, once again, had overplayed his hand and was reminded that he needed to keep his mouth shut sometimes.
"Alright, fine. Just screw your old friend over." Crate whined, pouting as he flattened his ears. Big Jug looked like he could spit metal.
"Always a pleasure, Crate." Bug Jug grunted, sarcasm dripping from every letter. "Bring the gil and a cart round to the cave. And -you- can load them. And don't let me ever see your face again after this, or I'll destroy it."
Crate nodded and then, he quickly scooted his way across the room to the door, keep both eyes on Big Jug the whole way.
Once at the door, Crate paused and, despite himself, had to get the last word.
"I'm like herpes, Big Jug. I just keep coming back." Crate flashed a grin and then sprinted away at full speed.
"Uh, well, uh, I, sir its, all of them."
"That's impossible! How the hell do thirty healthy slaves all die in one night?"
Big Jug was, as his name implied, big. But he was a roe, not a jug. And he was mad as hell as he tried to process the reality that his auction meat that was supposed to make him his this moon's paycheck had just died on him. The giant chewed on his pipe angrily and his black beard shook in anger with his body.
"Looks like some sort of rot sir. None of the boys down below even want to get near them corpses." Squeaked Big Jug's number two: a small, lalafell female who's talent in business made up for her lack of physical prowess.
The two were standing by the door to the basement inside the small, Mist house. Â The small, friendly cottage with its many flower gardens outside, seemed unassuming enough to the unassuming eye. But it was tactically located. It's position relevant to the coast, as well its close proximity to other persons eager to trade in flesh and coin meant their little operation normally ran without a hitch.
Normally.
This was not normal. Thirty slaves was a lot of gil wasted and Big Jug had bills and employees to pay.
"Rot is not possible." Big Jug growled as he looked at the basement door and pictured the cells beneath his feet. "We keep that place too clean and feed them too we'll for this to-"
The door opened and the lalafell immediately went to the basement door and locked it as Big Jug spun.
The sight of the small, blond miqo'te that shut the door behind him didn't help Big Jug's mood. Not one bit
"I swear to the hells, Crate."  Big Jug began advancing on the small man. Crate eyed the massive Roe with a degree of apprehension but the blond miqo'te gave a mischievous smirk. "If you have anything to do with my problem..."
"Considering they're dead, you should be glad I'm here to buy." Crate replied with a shrug.
Big Jug roared as his suspicions were suddenly confirmed and he charged Crate.
The small miqo'te threw himself out of harm's way as Big Jug crushed the door to bits and went stumbling onto the lawn, his face red in anger and blood from the impact. Â
Crate picked himself up, dusted off his gilded robe and faced the ruined door.
"Tsk Tsk. First the slaves and now the door. How much damage am I going to cause you today?"
Crate..." Big Jug heaved heavy breaths as he shook, barely able to contain his rage. Â " You...you...you cost me..."
"Couple million at least based on your figures last year." Â Crate beamed and cooked his head. " But seeing as they are dead, and you need to make a profit, how bout you sell those cadavers to me! Standard discount of course."
"You killed them! No deal! Go to hell!" Big Jug snarled like a bull and cracked his knuckles. Â "I'll kill you"
"Big Jug, put your pride back in your pants with your dick and suck it up." Crate rolled his eyes. Â " I -own- your balls and you should be thrilled I even want to pay seeing as I could have just killed them, told the authorities about your fun little organization here, and -then- taken the corpses for free after they busted down your door and dragged you off. I, oh look a blue bird!"
The blond glanced at a flying speck of blue and locked his lips.
"Turnips, I could go for some blue bird stew right now. Just like my momma-""
"I should have snapped your neck years ago." Big Jug howled and stormed inside, with Crate quickly retreating and putting a large desk between them.
"Maybe you should have, but if you kill me now two things happen. One, no one buys the bodies"
"I can live with that," Big Jug added, shoving the desk aside.
"Andandand!" Crate stammered, reaching into his coat and pulling out a vile of water. Crate then began to bluff as hard as his poker face would let him. " You touch me, I drop this, and we all die of the same rot I infected your slaves with! You want to die pooping yourself to death, be my guest. Literally, you poop your own organs out. As well as your flesh rotting painfully."Â That wasn't -really- how the pox he had used worked but Crate figured his version sounded way less pleasant.
Big Jug paused and stopped.  He knew Crate, heck he had hired Crate for awhile, and while the blond male might have been bluffing, Big Jug wasn't eager to test out and see if the small miqo'te was. Big Jug had seen what sort of dangerous things Crate often hid in those ridiculously opulent robes of his.
The massive Roe heaved and shook but did not raise hands to kill.
"I think you are bluffing." Big Jug challenged. Â " I know you love being alive."
"Yeah, but you have no way of knowing if I stay dead." Crate bluffed back. " Very good skill, my art. Wanna test em?" He leveled his blue eyes right into the grey rocks that Big Jug used as eyes. Â Big Jug grunted, crackled his knuckles, and then backed down.
"Full price for them." Big Jug growled.
"Sod that. I have a discount."
"It's been revoked." Big Jug snorted. "You lucky I need them gone."
"Way to be a friend and a buddy" Crate pouted. Â "Half."
"Full." Jug snapped sternly. "You think I can't find some scientist or some other spell slinger to sell those corpses too?"
"Not safely and not before they rot and devalue even more." Crate retorted quickly. "Half"
Big Jug crossed his arms.
"Full. Final offer. You clearly need them more than me now."
Crate grumbled and sucked on his teeth. It was true. He needed the bodies now after all. Why he'd done all this in the first place. The short man had the gil, of course, but he was super annoyed that his plan to get those remains at a discount hadn't work. He, once again, had overplayed his hand and was reminded that he needed to keep his mouth shut sometimes.
"Alright, fine. Just screw your old friend over." Crate whined, pouting as he flattened his ears. Big Jug looked like he could spit metal.
"Always a pleasure, Crate." Bug Jug grunted, sarcasm dripping from every letter. "Bring the gil and a cart round to the cave. And -you- can load them. And don't let me ever see your face again after this, or I'll destroy it."
Crate nodded and then, he quickly scooted his way across the room to the door, keep both eyes on Big Jug the whole way.
Once at the door, Crate paused and, despite himself, had to get the last word.
"I'm like herpes, Big Jug. I just keep coming back." Crate flashed a grin and then sprinted away at full speed.
