(09-11-2013, 03:23 PM)Siobhain Wrote: On the topic of ignoring people when you're in a couple--
For new RPers especially, it's really easy to suffer from peer pressure. People who feel somewhat insecure about their RP and whether or not it's any good find some semblance of security in a solid RP relationship. When the person they RP with gets on and goes "You need to come RP with me nao" they'll usually do it because they don't want to be thrown away and have all their RP go down the toilet just because they felt they were 'neglecting' their character's significant other.
The whole time issue comes into play here. For those RP partners who realize there's going to be a schedule for one of them, they're trying to make every moment count. All other RP at that point is extraneous, it's walk up, it -might- develop their character, but they're plateau'd into the comfort zone with one person. That also contributes to the pressure thing.
People can become jealous or possessive over the people they RP intimately with; one of the best aspects to black hole RP is that you're not writing something intimate and it keeps a level of detachment well in hand. They might not intend to feel that way, but it's fairly normal for newer people especially. You're showing a little part of you that you're probably embarrassed of and those same doubts about your quality might arise in the face of the potential of your partner ditching you for someone better. Many people don't -mean- to sound like nags.
RP partnerships shouldn't be exclusive with their RP, but in many cases it will be. You'll think you want someone to do walk up with you all the time but if you're in the middle of an extremely intense scene and someone strides up with a 'Oh hi, guys, can you point me towards the Adventurers' Guild?' you might not be as open to getting really in depth with them. It takes the pair of RPers who are together to acknowledge everything before hand, set their boundaries, and be supportive of each other and all other RPers they meet. As much as I hate to say it, you're developing friendships with the people you RP with-- you're getting to know their style and their approach to their character and while it's not a requirement, it helps to be tactful and helpful to -anyone- you choose to roleplay with.
I, personally, understand and I want so badly to remain neutral about the people I RP with and not get to know them very well OOCly. It just doesn't happen. I want to check in on people who've asked me questions OOC and see how they're doing and try to help them out. That same quality makes me... pretty awful at RP relationships, I think, as much as I enjoy them.
A very good point you have pointed out, Sio. *Yoda voice*
Though on your last part:
Caring about people-not the RP characters-but the actual people behind them is not a negative thing. Making friend's outside JUST the game is not an issue-but when you blur the line between being friends and MORE then that due to the RP in question is where things get more dicey.
As you said, set border's, communicate. Etc.etc.
"Running is a good option." -
