K'ailia's tail fuzzed out as the fetish fetish was placed in front of her face, and in-took air just before the powder and bowl was placed over her head. She did not know what the powder was, but she held her breath, and listened to the instructions.
So it was Drake Gland powder. Inhaling even a little bit, would be extremely undesirable, if not, could cause breathing complications. If she breathed out too far, the powder would fly up, possibly into her mouth, nose and eyes. If she inhaled too quickly, her nose, throat and lungs would pay the price.
K'ailia closed her eyes, relaxed her body while keeping her breath held. The only way to ensure the powder remains where it is, is to breath so slow, that it neither lifts into the air, nor goes into her nose. One of the meditation states she had learned in Gridania should help with that she thought. Slowly, she released her breath through her nose, a little at a time, keeping her eyes closed, focusing on the breath.
The rest of her body was no longer there. Only her breathing was all she focused on, trying to find the right meditative state. The first state, she could see the powder shift slightly. She focused on a deeper state, until finally it would seem to any other observer, that she had gone limp like death.
Continuing focus on her breathing, she slowly opened her eyes to look at the fetish for a moment, taking in the bones shape, she closed her eyes once more and thought on the bones. The bones would give wisdom and calm the elder had said. This meant, from what she gathered, was that she was to reflect upon all her decisions she had made. To reflect upon her past, that led to the situation she was in now.
And finally, the question came to her. What was important to her? She had came here after remembering her brothers and sisters. She was invited back here by K'ile, to serve as an outsider. Indeed she was, but even having left the tribe, her mother had brought her things, she had made her dorm as close to tribe life as she could.
The tribe was important to her. Regardless of her tribe mates treating her as an outsider. Regardless of her mother constantly running away, and chucking things at her. Regardless of K'ile and his big mouth that started the whole mess to begin with. She still loved her tribe, but it still hurt that she was treated as an outsider before she even thought about leaving the tribe. And when K'ile got her and her mother back together, she had changed her mind of leaving the tribe, only to find herself feeling pushed away.
She opened her eyes, as tears poured out onto the necklace, onto the powder. She had felt alone since returning to Gridania. Unappreciated. Useless. What good was learning conjury, if people like her mother would run away at the first sign of magical use? And most of all, what was she to do, now that she was thrust into leadership of Ul'dah Garden. She had no answers. She had made a bad decision out of anger and hurt, without ever really explaining her feelings. But truth be told, she never really had the chance. The moment she spoke to her mother the first time, the yelling and name calling had begun.
So she stayed pinned under the bowl, her tears flowing across the fetish, as she did her best to maintain her breathing, even while thinking on all that. How long would she be forced to stay there? If she was to stay this way for a week, she knew she deserved it. The timid girl had grown into someone as violent and angry as her mother. And it was that violence and anger, that had put her in the position she was in now. But she still... had the desire to be with her family.
So it was Drake Gland powder. Inhaling even a little bit, would be extremely undesirable, if not, could cause breathing complications. If she breathed out too far, the powder would fly up, possibly into her mouth, nose and eyes. If she inhaled too quickly, her nose, throat and lungs would pay the price.
K'ailia closed her eyes, relaxed her body while keeping her breath held. The only way to ensure the powder remains where it is, is to breath so slow, that it neither lifts into the air, nor goes into her nose. One of the meditation states she had learned in Gridania should help with that she thought. Slowly, she released her breath through her nose, a little at a time, keeping her eyes closed, focusing on the breath.
The rest of her body was no longer there. Only her breathing was all she focused on, trying to find the right meditative state. The first state, she could see the powder shift slightly. She focused on a deeper state, until finally it would seem to any other observer, that she had gone limp like death.
Continuing focus on her breathing, she slowly opened her eyes to look at the fetish for a moment, taking in the bones shape, she closed her eyes once more and thought on the bones. The bones would give wisdom and calm the elder had said. This meant, from what she gathered, was that she was to reflect upon all her decisions she had made. To reflect upon her past, that led to the situation she was in now.
And finally, the question came to her. What was important to her? She had came here after remembering her brothers and sisters. She was invited back here by K'ile, to serve as an outsider. Indeed she was, but even having left the tribe, her mother had brought her things, she had made her dorm as close to tribe life as she could.
The tribe was important to her. Regardless of her tribe mates treating her as an outsider. Regardless of her mother constantly running away, and chucking things at her. Regardless of K'ile and his big mouth that started the whole mess to begin with. She still loved her tribe, but it still hurt that she was treated as an outsider before she even thought about leaving the tribe. And when K'ile got her and her mother back together, she had changed her mind of leaving the tribe, only to find herself feeling pushed away.
She opened her eyes, as tears poured out onto the necklace, onto the powder. She had felt alone since returning to Gridania. Unappreciated. Useless. What good was learning conjury, if people like her mother would run away at the first sign of magical use? And most of all, what was she to do, now that she was thrust into leadership of Ul'dah Garden. She had no answers. She had made a bad decision out of anger and hurt, without ever really explaining her feelings. But truth be told, she never really had the chance. The moment she spoke to her mother the first time, the yelling and name calling had begun.
So she stayed pinned under the bowl, her tears flowing across the fetish, as she did her best to maintain her breathing, even while thinking on all that. How long would she be forced to stay there? If she was to stay this way for a week, she knew she deserved it. The timid girl had grown into someone as violent and angry as her mother. And it was that violence and anger, that had put her in the position she was in now. But she still... had the desire to be with her family.