Poe's Journal Entry
The writing shows a shakiness not evident in the earlier entry.Failure. Isn’t that what drives so many of us? I failed them again…and in my own anger lashed out. I arrived to the ship to find Rose gravely injured. Lina was patching her up. Glancing around the room I saw that everyone else appeared…numb. They had free Saefinn, thank the Gods…but at what cost. S’anhu was as pale as the memories that now haunt him. Ace was so dark, cold. Seeing Rose…all that blood. I realized I had clearly missed something they…the crew needed me at. I didn’t want to tell them I had been in the South Shroud, studying with a Padjal by the name of Raya-O-Senna. I wanted to come back and make them all proud…that I wouldn’t be the weakest link. In anger I burst out at Ace, misunderstanding his statement. After patching up Rose and clarifying things with Ace, we realized Daevien was missing. Kora told us he was being brought to Limsa… Ryillin announced he was going to find him, insisting he go alone. Why? Why would I not want to be there? And…his question, do I really care for Daevien? Ace stated I was going and thank Menphina for keeping Daevien alive at all. Ryillinn discovered Daevien, beaten and bloody just off the road outside of Costa del Sol. The stench of blood festering in the heat is something I will soon not forget. I did my best to heal him…at least physically.
Returning to the ship, Daevien was able to sit and rest. Rose was still not feeling well. I should have been more attentive but I think…I just sorta withdrew into my head, guilt and shame overwhelming my own ability to help. She got sick and she left…stupidly of us, Ace later pointed out. Lina and him bickered about that choice.
I realize now the toll this has taken on poor S’anhu. His words have me confused as to what exactly did happen during the rescue of Saefinn. I wanted to speak to him more on that, but Ryillin and him got into a heated arguement and Ry simply put him to sleep. I can appreciate Ryillin was trying to subdue the situation, and he did go to gather food for everyone, but…S’anhu is hurting too. Lina and I were able to move him to my hammock I hung up and I hope he sleeps off some of the horror of the day. After eating the soup Ryillin provided, Daevien and I returned to the inn. Thankfully he is sleeping peacefully now, while I sit and smoke…and write….and think. Perhaps even plan…