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Poe’s Journal Entry
A simple flow with the writing. Small sketches of recognizable faces of the crew members fill the border of the writing.
I decided against drinking the tea this evening. I was actually going from stall to stall, speaking with vendors and setting up delivery of ingredients Ry needs. I found a beautiful leather journal and quickly purchased it. I don’t need a new one, but I had been thinking after speaking with Rose…isn’t this journal where I start to figure things out before I speak to someone else? Maybe it would help her as well. I remember her confusion, unsure what to do…. I hope she would be interested. I even asked the leatherworker to burn the image of a small rose in the corner of the front leather cover.
I brought the journal back to her room I am crashing at. Tucked it away, I can surprise her with it soon enough. Then I heard S’anhu call me over the pearl. He wanted to know if I had time for that talk. That’s when I decided not to drink the tea…probably a good thing too.
I rushed out to the point to see him, he awkwardly said hi and I rushed over apologizing, I just wanted to give him a hug. I swear I have seen sadness and torment in those eyes of his…but he moved away before I could hug him, answering the pearl. Ryillin, Carter, Keldion, S’anhu…the banter, more important.
I turned to notice Lina had approached and went over, hugged her….I…I didn’t have a family who hugged. And, isn’t that affection, that contact important? It’s another way to show you care, right? She seemed a bit awkward about it. I asked how she was….I doubt she was honest, her energy felt colder than I expected.
S’anhu walked away….I wanted to speak to him so we followed him over to the point. I was trying to explain we were all important, we were all useful…I don’t think S’anhu believes me, even though Lina nodded her head in agreement….So I brought up the party, wanted to find something to brighten the conversation….what a bust. Keldion showed up and it turned into a discussion about the drinking and whether that was a good time. How horrible, I just wanted some casual, fun banter…I can only think of the pain…Lina left quickly. I remember a time when I would have been able to make someone, anyone feel better.
And then Keldion said he was worried about me. About me?! I guess, yeah, I had to acknowledge I haven’t been my usual cheerful self. But, in my defense…how can I be cheerful when everyone around me is hurting?! Even my weak attempts barely crack a forced smile from my friends these days…S’anhu left…I asked him if we could talk soon. We never seem to be able to speak, timing is never right.
I know I was prying when I asked Keldion how he was…my small outburst. I am just tired of everyone walking around not saying what they are thinking and feeling. And then he started to open up. Rose was right….I didn’t expect this from Keldion. After a few sips from his flask, me blurting out that Daevien never said how he felt, so it made this all easier….I sent myself back to the inn. I haven’t gone up to Rose’s room yet. Been sitting at the table downstairs, smoking a cigar and watching the locals. I have tried…with poor results to check on just about everyone. I just want to see how Ace is…I mean, I saw him the other night…but he had a lot to deal with…
The bottom of the page has a simple heart drawn, smudged.
