I'm finding it difficult to articulate the response I'd like to make, so please try not to read too terribly far into what I say.
I myself enjoy a good romance RP, but I feel that the other party's response to whatever approach I choose is most likely going to dictate how the relationship - romantic or not - will end up developing. I have played characters that fall hard and fast, and I have played characters that are much more reserved. It seems like most of the issue comes from those who play the 'hard and fast' type - which I can certainly understand. When I've played that type, if it's met with resistance, I've never gone the 'guilt' route ICly, because that's just..wrong?
Having said that, however, my current main character has low self-esteem and does in fact feel that the whole of womankind would find him less than desirable - but that's not a hook for me to try and guilt a possible RP partner, it's an outgrowth of the backstory I've chosen. I think the thing to keep in mind is that phrase I just used; "possible RP partner". Being rebuffed should be seen as an opportunity to grow the character - isn't that the whole point of what we're doing? Yes, there are people that play characters that flit from relationship to relationship, but if that's how the character develops, great. If it's to satisfy a need that someone is not getting OOC, then I think that's a problem, and I think that's where we have obsessions and 'stalking' occuring.
If I were going to ever play a character that would become obsessed with another (i haven't yet because it kind of creeps me out just thinking about it), I would approach the other party both IC and OOC and say something along the lines of, 'hey, I have this idea for this character based on this, this, and this, would you be interested in playing a character development storyline based on xyz?'. If someone can't give an OOC reason for their character's obsession/guilt tripping and/or can't describe how such a thing is going to develop or grow the character, then I don't think the person is RPing, I think they're trying to get themselves off on making someone uncomfortable, or just hoping that the "target" will choose to throw them a bone (so to speak).
Granted, that's just my lowly, lowly opinion. If you disagree with me, it must mean you hate me and I'm terrible, and I should just go back under my rock because no one ever likes me and I'm so lonely.
I myself enjoy a good romance RP, but I feel that the other party's response to whatever approach I choose is most likely going to dictate how the relationship - romantic or not - will end up developing. I have played characters that fall hard and fast, and I have played characters that are much more reserved. It seems like most of the issue comes from those who play the 'hard and fast' type - which I can certainly understand. When I've played that type, if it's met with resistance, I've never gone the 'guilt' route ICly, because that's just..wrong?
Having said that, however, my current main character has low self-esteem and does in fact feel that the whole of womankind would find him less than desirable - but that's not a hook for me to try and guilt a possible RP partner, it's an outgrowth of the backstory I've chosen. I think the thing to keep in mind is that phrase I just used; "possible RP partner". Being rebuffed should be seen as an opportunity to grow the character - isn't that the whole point of what we're doing? Yes, there are people that play characters that flit from relationship to relationship, but if that's how the character develops, great. If it's to satisfy a need that someone is not getting OOC, then I think that's a problem, and I think that's where we have obsessions and 'stalking' occuring.
If I were going to ever play a character that would become obsessed with another (i haven't yet because it kind of creeps me out just thinking about it), I would approach the other party both IC and OOC and say something along the lines of, 'hey, I have this idea for this character based on this, this, and this, would you be interested in playing a character development storyline based on xyz?'. If someone can't give an OOC reason for their character's obsession/guilt tripping and/or can't describe how such a thing is going to develop or grow the character, then I don't think the person is RPing, I think they're trying to get themselves off on making someone uncomfortable, or just hoping that the "target" will choose to throw them a bone (so to speak).
Granted, that's just my lowly, lowly opinion. If you disagree with me, it must mean you hate me and I'm terrible, and I should just go back under my rock because no one ever likes me and I'm so lonely.
