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Writing Challenge! (Second)


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Writing Challenge! (Second)
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Warren Castillev
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RE: Writing Challenge! (First) |
#76
08-04-2014, 12:39 PM
(This post was last modified: 08-04-2014, 12:39 PM by Warren Castille.)
Here I go.

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Sunlight filtered in through the windows, the illuminated rectangle slowly crawling across the floor indicating that the sun had only just begun its shift for the day. Franz was awake as usual and enjoying the brief moments of silence he'd come to appreciate in the often-disastrous wake of his newfound companions.

He was briefly distracted by what he had settled on for his breakfast. Dried and cut grains? Some sort of process made it crunchy but edible, and with sufficient sweetening and an ample supply of aldgoat's milk it wasn't awful. It was far from the variety of a proper Garlean breakfast; Gone were the finely-prepared eggs and meats and breads, missing were the spices that made Garlean cuisine what it was. He'd traded that, somehow, for cold rice and milk.

What was he doing in Eorzea? It was not his home. It was not where he was raised, where he was built. He owed nothing to the land, and he certainly didn't owe anything to its people. The old thoughts ran through his mind as he absently spooned another bite into his mouth, but there was something missing to connect them to his mind and heart.

The miqo'te woman. An antagonist from the get-go, more interested in picking fights and teasing than getting anything done. Her mate, the one full of regret and indecision. Somehow he'd come to bunk with these two? Had he met them on a battlefield prior to Carteneau he knew he would have cloven them in two and been onto the next group of would-be heroes. They were precisely what the Empire wanted to exterminate.

...but that wasn't quite true, either. The woman's demeanor hid depth that Franz knew existed but he suspect she did not. The man's sorrows came from a source of wanting to have done the right thing. They were not simple-minded, they were complex. They were people.

Franz gazed absently off at the wall opposite him, at one of twenty-seven pictures of the Sultana that graced their humble abode. He reconsidered, not for the first time, and certainly not for the last, that Eorzea wasn't the sort of place the Empire painted it as. For all of their faults, and all of his own issues, the place and its people were growing on him. In time, he wondered if he might even consider these people true frie-

BOOM

One of the cannons from the front yard had gone off. Snapped back to his interrupted meal, Franz was dimly aware of yelling in the front yard.

"Load the rest, Kage! That's the last time they pick at my garden! And wake Porkchop up, too! He can help!"

Or maybe not.


Not as long as I'd like but the scene sort of jumped out at me right away so I wanted to write it down before I forgot it. Feel free to judge.

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RE: Writing Challenge! (First) |
#77
08-04-2014, 01:33 PM
(This post was last modified: 08-04-2014, 01:44 PM by McBeefâ„¢.)
Aya sighs and gives a pouting kick to one of the pebbles, sending it skittering across the beach. It had seemed like the perfect job, a short jaunt entertaining nobles on a luxury yacht cruising out of Vesper bay. It was a three day cruise, and she would have made more money on those three days than she would have in a month of serving ale in the Quicksand. She frowns and looks across the beach, “I could have bought so many shoes.”

The guests weren’t the only ones indulging though, the drunken captain had hit a sunken rock in the middle of the night, tearing a hole in the bottom of the boat.

They limped through the night, barely managing to run aground on this island, though only the twelve knew where they were now. She looks down at her stiletto heels, the heels just sinking into the sand, “Blah… who knows what the saltwater will do to the aldgoat leather.” She stifles a sob, “I just bought these, it’s not fair.”

Across the beach lie socialites in various states of shock, as if this was a thing that happened to other people. Currently they seemed more interested in fighting over the last of the food from the ship, untold luxurious delicacies spilled across the sand, already starting to rot outside of the cool confines of the ice crystal packed ships hold. Two men fought over a bottle of Ishgardian brandy worth more than Aya could make in a year, and she sighs lamenting what the dry sea breeze is doing to her skin.

Suddenly a scream pierces the air, a pair of monstrous claws emerge from the surf, grabbing the two men tussling over the bottle. People shriek and run off the beach as the giant crab brings its prey to its chittering maw. Aya rubs her forehead, “Why is life so unfair to me.” She gets up and stretches briefly, a series of a graceful movements that seem more like preparations for dance than battle. She runs towards the monster, through the panicked throng, her heels not seeming to slow her down. As she gets closer she scoops down and picks up a spar of wood, it is a remnant of the ship’s mast, one end a jagged break.

As she reaches the surf she tenses and then leaps, her form undergoing one lazy rotation in the air before she lands with the spar, point first, the jagged wood piercing the creatures thick skeleton and filling the air with yellow blood. “Don’t cry Aya…” She thinks as she looks down at the fluid soaking her clothes, “Maybe it will come out with a wash.” The creature collapses with a bubbling shriek, but after a moment attempts to regain its feet.

Aya bites her lip and looks down at her feet, “I *just* bought them.” With a growl she drives a heel downward into the thing’s brain, her heel snapping off inside its carapace. The crab shuddered for a moment, then finally collapsed.

She kicks off her ruined shoes and hops off the crab, plucking the bottle from the blubbering men.

“Please gentlemen.” She gives her best professional smile, “Leave the refreshments to the staff.”
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RE: Writing Challenge! (First) |
#78
08-04-2014, 01:47 PM
Warren, it was beautiful. Let's see if I can get this right.

Episode 1: 8/4/2014
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Spoiler
It had been another late, sleepless night. Warren stood, brooding, at the same pillar he always did at the Quicksand, trying to cover the little CC and WC in a heart that had been carved in once again. Every single time he'd gotten it filled in, replastered, touched up to make the pillar spotless, another one would pop up the next day, as if the pillar demanded the carving be there.

"Gods, is it that obvious...?" Warren would ask himself that question when the carving would reappear again. Seeing the sun rise, he departed from the Quicksand for a few bells. It was time for his morning run around Ul'dah, followed by a quick touch-up to make sure his surcoat looked proper. The pillar had once again been repaired, and this time, he hoped it would stay that way. He didn't want Lady Crofte to have any further looks, as it seemed all of the patrons knew exactly who the carving was for. "When did they even have the time to carve such a thing?"

The run was nice. It allowed him to unwind and not worry about anything. What the day would bring, what kinds of trouble would happen around the city, his thoughts of Ser Crofte. Gods. The moment he thought of her his face flushed red. As he finished his run, he quickly prepared for the rest of the day, and made his way back to the Quicksand just in time to see a person hunched over by the pillar. Giggling. There was a faint scratching sound.

Warren was a man of few words during business hours, but he had to ask. Walking up slowly behind the small lalafellin man by the pillar, he leaned down, whispering. "What're you carving there?" The whole city could have been awoken from the shriek the man let out, having been discovered. In a panic, the lalafell turned around to face Warren. "I...It..uh...it's. IT'S NOT WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE!"

Surely the whole city would soon see the lalafell scampering out of the Quicksand for his life, being chased by an angry highlander, sword and shield out.

Episode 2: 8/5/2014

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The sounds of the clanking armor echoed through the small alleyway. After nearly running around the entire city again, Warren had cornered the small man. “There’s *huff* no where *huff* left to run.” For a lalafell, the little guy certainly had speed and stamina. Warren came with a few fulms, catching his breath. “Have you been the one carving up the Quicksand’s pillar?” It wasn’t meant to be intimidating. At least, not entirely.

The lalafell looked up in horror as he noticed his path of escape was a dead end, and the only exit was blocked. He fell to his knees in fright. “PLEASE DON’T LOCK ME UP! I SWEAR! IT WAS MY FIRST TIME! IT’LL NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN!” Warren was a little confused. “You mean to say you aren’t the one that’s been carving various initials into the pillar?” He was gruff, but he wasn’t without reason. The lalafell looked up again, sniffling, “of course I’m not! I can’t even reach some of the places it’s been carved!” Warren knew he was telling the truth. But what did he mean by “his first time”?

Warren’s expression softened just slightly and he sighed. “Let’s go. I may not have the authority to make an arrest, but I can certainly have you apologize to Momodi for defacing her establishment. The walk back was very quiet. As they reentered the Quicksand, Warren bent down to see the incomplete carving. A faint heart had been carved, but work on any letters had not.

If he’d simply ran faster in the morning. Or gotten dressed faster. Or simply stayed at the Quicksand instead. Warren felt guilty that there had been an opportunity in the first place, as if it were his fault. After sheepishly apologizing to Momodi as well, he began to return to his post, immediately noticing a much larger, much more detailed heart had been carved at a spot on the pillar right above where he normally stood. “Menphina have mercy….” Warren tried his best to ignore it. The giant, fancily carved heart, with CC and WC carved into it even deeper than any previous attempt.

Warren gave one of the most pitiable looks he could to Momodi. With a small glimmer in her eyes, realizing he’d noticed the handiwork, she smiled and said, “you know I won’t reveal who did that.” A playfully mischievous grin on her face.

It would be a long day. A very long day, indeed.

Episode 3: 8/7/2014

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Spoiler
As the morning dragged on, more and more people began to enter the Quicksand. Warren did his best to stand tall, upright, and serious. If he pretended it wasn’t a problem, perhaps the other patrons within the Quicksand would do the same. It wasn’t as if they pretended they hadn’t seen the large carved heart, but more that they thought nothing of it. Of course, with every new person that walked in, Warren would become more and more embarrassed of the entire ordeal.

As it become mid-day, he heard the familiar jingle of jewelry and accessories, saw the swaying hips and long, blonde, hair hair, and realized that Aya had come in. Naturally, she walked right over, giving a slightly surprised gasp, obviously fake. “Oh my, Warren! How bold!” she gave him a small wink, knowing full-well he’d had nothing to do with the big heart, but the reaction was worth every gil.

Standing in the place Warren had been was now a dalamud-red-faced Highlander. Was it always this warm in the Quicksand? Had his armor always felt this heavy? Why were the braids of his hair so tight today? He could FEEL them! The very thought that everyone in the Quicksand knew his feelings towards Coatleque, coupled with the now-giant carved heart above his head was simply too much.

His eyes widened just slightly, and he heard a slight ringing. “Oh, it’s getting smaller” were the last words he said as he hit the ground, fainting. With a thud, he was passed out.

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RE: Writing Challenge! (First) |
#79
08-04-2014, 01:54 PM
And here I thought the culprit was Aya!

Good job, though. It's definitely in line with the character and his motivations. More lighthearted than my usual fair, but that makes it an excellent aside.

OSCARE ROLL MORE I WANT MORE OF THIS.

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RE: Writing Challenge! (First) |
#80
08-04-2014, 01:57 PM
(08-04-2014, 01:54 PM)Warren Castille Wrote: And here I thought the culprit was Aya!

Good job, though. It's definitely in line with the character and his motivations. More lighthearted than my usual fair, but that makes it an excellent aside.

OSCARE ROLL MORE I WANT MORE OF THIS.

>_> <_< >_>

...we could always continue with what we have. I'm sure I find a way to make it more ridiculous.

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RE: Writing Challenge! (First) |
#81
08-04-2014, 02:01 PM
Inb4 there was always more than one culprit.
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RE: Writing Challenge! (First) |
#82
08-04-2014, 02:32 PM
(08-04-2014, 12:16 PM)ExKage Wrote: ((I'm sorry Verad.))

As I said, easy-mode! Very good job.

It'll be a little while before I can respond in kind, so hang in there.

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RE: Writing Challenge! (First) |
#83
08-04-2014, 02:42 PM
Knight! This is for you! Smile (I hope I did okay! Blush)
**********************************************************

The winds were favorable tonight, a low breeze, not creating much distraction with the trees, but strong enough to cover her tracks. Kiht looked down at ground, placing her hand into the imprint she had come across. Even with the dusk growing darker, she could tell it was what she'd thought: Ixal. She frowned and the spear across her back felt heavier.

It looked likely to be a long night.

She moved forward, her boots making soft, almost inaudible steps in the leafy undergrowth. The light crunches made were eased by the wind, and she offered a simple prayer that they would hold until she could locate the source of the print.

As she crossed the crest of a hill there he was. And alone. A grin flashed across her lips and she looked down. It was her lucky night. Scooting down the hill silently she approached the small fire, the Ixal had drawn and was sitting next to. As it appeared this one was alone, she wanted this quiet, but still needed some certainty.

And the wind did its job.

Circling around the face him, he still hadn't moved, nor had he seen her until she stood directly across, spear drawn, staring him down, an angry look in here eyes, exponentially stronger with the fire between them. 

"Are you alone?" Her voice was loud enough where he could hear and stern. Her breathing was calm waiting for his response, and her ears listened for noise, lest it be a trap. The Ixal nodded his head and began to slowly stand, trying to back away.  Why he was alone mattered not to Kiht and she leapt quickly over the flames, the spear raised overhead and once close enough on the descent, drove the blade into the Ixal's chest. The lone beast stumbled and dropped to the ground, gurgling slightly before his death. Kiht pulled the spear from him and returned it to her back. She looked down and shook her head.

"Stop coming to the Shroud." She said it to the dead creature before herand meant it for all of the Ixal. Snuffing out the flames of the fire, she moved quickly into the woods, and back to the night and eventually home.
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RE: Writing Challenge! (First) |
#84
08-04-2014, 02:48 PM
(This post was last modified: 08-04-2014, 03:30 PM by Aya.)
Natalie stretched her arms high above her head.  The morning sun always felt so good: the way it swept away the chill of the desert night, burning it away with a radiance befitting the Sultana herself.  It was a wonderful Ul'dahn day, of course it was always a wonderful Ul'dahn day for Natalie, and she had things to do: like wipe the grin off of her face, or maybe bask in the sun all day.

Oh, she wanted to, of course, but there was such good reason for the grin!  She couldn't help but think of all the people there were to see, and all of the days there were to ruin!  So many plans to hatch, and even more fun, to foil!  Rather than diminish, the Cheshire-like grin grew more and more as her mind meandered back through the last few days: memories of weddings called off, babies left crying, and Miqo'te children now afraid of milk.  It was like a special blend of catnip for the soul, a special elixir that reached deep into the heart of Clan McBeef, warming the heart, and satisfying the soul.

Look, things had kind of sucked for McBeef and Company latley, but really none of that should matter when there were smiles to wipe away, and good feelings to quash!  She reached back and scratched her rear idly.  Then a little more ~ it felt really good!  "What a perfect day to be Sultan Sworn!"  she thought to herself beaming that infectious grin across the court yard.  But in an instant, the grin suddenly became a look of confusion as she tilted her head, scratching a little harder.  "Or was it a Brass Blade..."  she blinked, then tilted her head the other way.  "It doesn't really matter does it? There are so many people who's days I can ruin!" The grin returned!


She'd strapped on her finest red armor, and then added, for flair, her favorite masked beret pulled over her head and eyes, it always seemed to help clear up the confusion.  Natalie looked back over her shoulder, spotting the smiling blue-haired Miqo'te man in the window.  She grinned, kicking her foot back and offering a little finger-wave.  Kage smiled a smile filled with the warmth of a dutiful certainty: the whole city might love Ser Natalie, but he loved her the most! She turned back down the road into the goblet, beginning to merrily skip along her way into town.


*******

"How better to start a day!?" Natalie thought to herself, as she grinned from ear-to-ear with a delightful mischief.  The small Miqo'te boy looked up at the woman bent over him; his eyes swelled with fright.  "You shouldn't play with that stuff - don't you know catnip is poisonous?" she exclaimed in such a tone of serious alarm.  The boy screamed, staring at the clump of plants squeezed so tightly in his little fist.  In a moment he had dropped them, and scampered away.  Natalie picked up the leaves, shoving them in her face, and rubbing her nose and cheeks against them with a sense of thrill and delight.  "ITS SUCH AN AMAZING DAY!" she yelled for anyone within hearing distance.

It was hard enough to avoid running into things while wearing the mask.  Having her face stuffed full of delicious, wonderful, and all-around amazing catnip made it that much harder.  She barely noticed as her hips and tail bumped into the cart, though her thoughts sprang into characteristically rapid action: "Oh what wa... I LOVE CATNIP!"

The little wheeled flower cart had been bumped loose, and began rolling down  the hill.  The flower girl let out a little yelp as it raced away from her, her ire immediately turning to Ser Oblivious McBeef.  The cart rumbled, and trundled down a path, heading into the city.  And Oblivious McBeef stayed true to her name.  "CATNIP!"

*******

Before the Gate of Nald, the shadows of the day seemed to grow deeper and longer.  An unnatural chill filled the air as a small, black tear in reality popped into existence.  It stretched and wobbled, growing slowly taller, and taller, until a dark shadowy-figure emerged from within, a visage of pure enmity, with an enveloping aura growing to monstrous proportion.

His voice roared with malevolence, uttered at Unicronian depths, causing the massive opened doors of the gate to quake and tremor, "I...." The eyes of the visage shot open, sewing terror among the guards, who clattered and clamored from their posts as quickly as their legs would carry them, "Am Jin'li... and this time, I shall not fail!"  The voice began to laugh, a maniacal menace that seemed to echo throughout ever alley, every street, every courtyard and hallway of the city. 

The Sultana suddenly shot up from her morning manicure.  "Did you hear that?!" she cried to her Vizier, her eyes were startled, her lips trembled in fear.  Her vizier, ever stoic and secure, nodded with solemnity, "Do not worry, Your Grace, I am sure General Aldynn will have Ser McBeef on it, immediately."  The Sultana let out a deep breath, her content smile returning. 

The shadowy visage of the resurrected Jin'li fell to silence, as the horrible, bellowing, roar of a laugh drew to an end.  He grinned with confidence, his eyes falling back to earth, resting upon the open, unguarded gate.  The only sound in the darkened air was the light rattle of wood upon paving stones.  The sound grew strangely louder, as Jin'li's eyes narrowed in curiosity, his celebration of imminent victory paused for a moment.

*******

The Sultan Blade, Brass Sworn giggled maniacally as she popped the chocolate into her mouth.  She chewed the delicious confection with an earnest affection, taking in the luscious flavors of the delicacy as they rushed through her body with a tingling energy.  She quickly popped another into her mouth, before rubbing her cheek against the ill-gotten catnip, purring with a contentment that the sound of wailing lovers walking their separate ways could not seem to penetrate.

*******

The shadow watched in amazement as the small flower cart trundled forward.  It had gained speed steadily as it made its way down every hill in the city, having spilled most of its contents of flowers it found itself filled now with an assortment of every variety of good available in the bazaar.  From linens, to jewelery, weapons, food, a large barrel of liquor, and a pot filled with gold. 

Jin'li rose to laugh once more, all of the might of Ul'dah, when faced with the power of the voidsent, could summon only a single lonely flower cart against him!  Just out of sight, as he reveled in the certainty of victory, a torch dropped by a fleeing guard rolled back and forth along the ramparts.  Pushed a little further by the monstrosity's wind-like guffaw, it plummeted, turning slowly in the air.

In the distance a woman was running toward the gate, passing through crowds of fleeing guards, she had tried to cut through the current, moving more quickly than a woman on heels should, long blonde hair trailing behind her.  A distinguished looking, white-haired Duskwight had just given up the chase.  Through ragged breaths, he sighed for his lost fortune, "My... imitation... fool's gold..."

"Noooooo!  That's Ma'am's ruuuuum....!" the blonde girl cried desperately, hand outstretched as if she could mentally stop the runaway cart in mid-flight.  In that instant her eye's opened wide with terror; not at the sight of the shadowy monstrosity threatening to envelope the entire gate, but instead at the bright flash of light, an eruption of fire as the torch fell squarely into the rambling cart, creating a veritable inferno as every flammable item within burst alight.

Jin'li's shade caught sight of the sudden threat at the very last moment.  His laugh ended with a throaty, "Uh... oh..." that shook the very ground.  As the cart reached him, the overheating barrel of Momodi's rum burst into a tremendous fireball.  The resulting cloud of smoke dissipated into the air, leaving behind only a badly scorched flower cart, carrying on its way out into the desert sands of Thanalan.

The blonde girl fell to her knees, crying in despair.  "Where will I ever get the gil to pay for this...."


******

The rug merchant let out a horrible cry of anguish as the billy club cracked against the back of his skull, "What do you think you're doing?! That hurt!!!"

"Just saying hello!" purred the grinning McBeef.  She shoved her face back into the mass of catnip with a satisfied grin.  "I really am the best Sultan Sworn..."

"I mean Brass Blade..."

"Best whatever.. I am just the best!"
She grinned manically, purring into the catnip. 


The Sultana, then the city itself, sighed in relief,
"Thank the Twelve for Ser McBeef..."

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RE: Writing Challenge! (First) |
#85
08-04-2014, 02:58 PM
Natalie shifts in her sleep, mumbling "Muhaha... fear me mortals."


-----------------------------------

That was the best Aya, if only every day of nat's was so exciting. Oh wait they kind of are. Hydalyn preserve Ul'dah.
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RE: Writing Challenge! (First) |
#86
08-04-2014, 03:09 PM
(This post was last modified: 08-04-2014, 03:09 PM by Oscare.)
I...
my poor challenge...
you guys are killing him... ;~;

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RE: Writing Challenge! (First) |
#87
08-04-2014, 03:17 PM
Natalie, that was the perfect Aya :-]

Thank you! I so enjoyed that! ^_^ Big GrinBig GrinBig Grin

(I've enjoyed the others too, I enjoy poor Warrens travails!)

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RE: Writing Challenge! (First) |
#88
08-04-2014, 03:53 PM
(This post was last modified: 08-04-2014, 03:57 PM by C'kayah Polaali.)
A thousand thousand threads of smoke rose in the evening sky over Ul'dah. The air was bitingly cold, unseasonably so, and each of the city's inhabitants burned fires to stave it off. No breeze stirred the cold air, and the city's smokes mixed into a stale lens that drove people indoors and led those who ventured into the streets to don makeshift masks to try to filter out the corruption and ash.

Further in from the Gold Court, past the Path of Coin and angling off from Fish Street was a cramped alley. In the back, a lone Miqo'te curled around a tiny brazier, feeding pellets of charcoal into the fierce, bright fire in an attempt to stay warm. His clothes were good, but worn, and a well-loved lance leaned against the wall. He cursed softly as his fingers found nothing more in the little box he'd bought. It was going to get cold before the night was over.

What drove him out of his bed? Away from the company of the white-haired woman who shared his life. What spurred him to trade comfort for the chill of this alley, the tiny flame of this brazier? Was he dissatisfied with his life? Had it always been so? He remembered pain on the sands as he fought the other Wolf-tribe Tias for the title and priviledge he sought for his own. He remembered the warm touch of the females after he'd won. Why had he left that? Left them? For this sandy city? For the wine and the stories and the smokes? For a Hyur? Why, then, had he left her as well?

He remembered stories of men who always sought what they didn't have. They would gain lives that other men would be happy to live, and they would forsake them in the hunt for what could be. Those stories almost never ended well, and he knew it. Yet here he was, in this alley, staring at the last pellet of charcoal as it slowly grew darker, cooler. He could return right now. Return to his Hyur, to his bed, to warmth and comfort. Instead, he prodded at the pellet with the sharp point of a dagger, stirring it to a last flicker of heat. He closed his eyes, enjoying the warmth, pretending for a moment he was somewhere else.

The pellet went out. He looked up into the chill of the sky. The red, baleful eye of Moraig had just surmounted the sharp spire of Teleg Than. It was time. Rising to his feet, he took his lance and walked out of the alley into the broad street beyond. Facing him stood a small knot of people: A richly dressed Lalafell surrounded by men in browned-iron bearing swords. The Lalafell was young, looking almost childlike with his lack of beard, his soft limbs. Yet the Miqo'te knew that others had paid dearly for their mistake in thinking him weak. This was Benetua Ruranua, representative of Lolorito himself. The Lalafell covered his nose with a finely embroidered silk handkerchief and sniffed diffidently, an obvious affectation.

"Val Nunh", Benetua's voice was soft and quiet, and the Miqo'te had to strain to hear it. "Thank you for coming to speak with me tonight. I think you'll find my proposition... *interesting*..."
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Unnamed Mercenaryv
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RE: Writing Challenge! (First) |
#89
08-04-2014, 04:29 PM
(08-04-2014, 03:09 PM)Oscare Wrote: I...
my poor challenge...
you guys are killing him... ;~;

[Sad Trombone plays]

Hey! Warren and Franz's were perfectly IC. 

>_> <_< The Franz one is practically canon already. We just need to know what he actually eats for breakfast.

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McBeefâ„¢v
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RE: Writing Challenge! (First) |
#90
08-04-2014, 04:31 PM
(08-04-2014, 04:29 PM)Unnamed Mercenary Wrote:
(08-04-2014, 03:09 PM)Oscare Wrote: I...
my poor challenge...
you guys are killing him... ;~;

[Sad Trombone plays]

Hey! Warren and Franz's were perfectly IC. 

>_> <_< The Franz one is practically canon already. We just need to know what he actually eats for breakfast.

More like cannon.

Heh.
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