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Marriage: How do you handle it?


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Marriage: How do you handle it?
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Velaenav
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Marriage: How do you handle it? |
#1
05-17-2015, 06:37 PM
Something I've been considering for a while now if the future of my character Seraphine. One day I would like her to get married to a lovely Elezen and such (gentlemen... Wink). But I would be unsure of how to go about it, since I have very little information about marriage in Eorzea. 

So I'm turning this over to the community, what is your take on marriage in the setting of Eorzea?

-Do only certain races get "married"? 
-Do you count the Eternal Bond as a marriage ceremony?
-What about last names? Would the woman take the man's? Is there any change at all? Does it have to do with position?
-Same-sex marriage in Eorzea?
-Any other thoughts?

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RE: Marriage: How do you handle it? |
#2
05-17-2015, 06:51 PM
Its my understanding that miqo'te may the the only playable race that don't normally marry due to the racial gender differences in supply and demand. Males of the keeper societies wander from tribe to tribe to help sustain the population for them and in Seeker society a worthy male (a Nunh) is selected to breed with the females to ensure strong offspring.

However with the new 'city miqo'te thing, this may not be the case. While they hold their old tribal names we can't be certain if they do or do not marry.

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RE: Marriage: How do you handle it? |
#3
05-17-2015, 06:54 PM
(This post was last modified: 05-17-2015, 06:56 PM by Ciel.)
Pretty sure EB can count as marriage, but it can also stand in place of other ceremonies where vows are needed between more than one person. Most often, though, it is the former.

As the devs have stated, same-sex isn't really a concern since most people in Eorzea have bigger things to worry about than who gets married to whom, or what gender the pair happens to be.  If people are happy together, great, that's all that really matters.  People of all races and tribes marry, both within their respective race/tribe, and with others from different groups.  It may not be as common as we perceive it to be, canonically, due to cultural differences.

As far as names, I've seen the woman taken the man's last name, but I've also seen the other way where the man takes the woman's last name.  And there have been plenty where no name change is involved at all. It's entirely a matter of preference.

If you're looking to do it for RP purposes, just go a step at a time.  Build rapport with someone and let things happen on their own.  If you want to do it just for grins OOCly, just to see what happens, it's also worth it for some of the items you get from it.
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RE: Marriage: How do you handle it? |
#4
05-17-2015, 07:05 PM
There's lore establishing that husbands and wives exist as titles, but there's nothing in game to show us where they come from. I know the Eternal Bond ceremony specifically points out that (the moogle, at least) they have no actual authority, but most people I know have just handwaved that.

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RE: Marriage: How do you handle it? |
#5
05-17-2015, 07:07 PM
(This post was last modified: 05-17-2015, 07:08 PM by Virella.)
Ishgardians seem to have politcal marriages, or so I assume such. Why else send assassins to a wedding ey? Smile

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RE: Marriage: How do you handle it? |
#6
05-17-2015, 07:23 PM
My tribal outcast Seeker got an Eternal Bond with another tribal outcast Seeker, and for all intents and purposes they consider it marriage, though neither has changed names (but that's mostly because we're poor and don't want to waste money on frivolous name changes).

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RE: Marriage: How do you handle it? |
#7
05-17-2015, 10:06 PM
Eternal Bond is an euphemism. For all purposes, it's marriage.

And I believe that there are some places where homophobia is a thing (there are two gay guys who had to flee their village because other people there didn't approve of their relationship), but in the bigger and more open-minded cities, gay marriage exists. Same with marriage between different races.
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RE: Marriage: How do you handle it? |
#8
05-17-2015, 10:09 PM
(05-17-2015, 10:06 PM)Imo Wrote: Eternal Bond is an euphemism. For all purposes, it's marriage.

And I believe that there are some places where homophobia is a thing (there are two gay guys who had to flee their village because other people there didn't approve of their relationship), but in the bigger and more open-minded cities, gay marriage exists. Same with marriage between different races.

Those two were outcast for being an interracial couple. They didn't even mention being discriminated against for being gay.

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RE: Marriage: How do you handle it? |
#9
05-17-2015, 10:13 PM
(05-17-2015, 10:09 PM)Chris Ganale Wrote:
(05-17-2015, 10:06 PM)Imo Wrote: Eternal Bond is an euphemism. For all purposes, it's marriage.

And I believe that there are some places where homophobia is a thing (there are two gay guys who had to flee their village because other people there didn't approve of their relationship), but in the bigger and more open-minded cities, gay marriage exists. Same with marriage between different races.

Those two were outcast for being an interracial couple. They didn't even mention being discriminated against for being gay.

Do they mention it's interracial? As far as I remember they only say they were discriminated against, and the game lets you draw your own conclusions whether it was because they're gay or different races. Possibly both.
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RE: Marriage: How do you handle it? |
#10
05-17-2015, 10:15 PM
It's a highlander dude and a...keeper? I have trouble telling them apart without getting right in their faces (this from a guy who plays two seekers), but he was dark-skinned so I assume he was a keeper. They stated in their dialogue they were run off for being two different races, not for being gay.

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RE: Marriage: How do you handle it? |
#11
05-17-2015, 11:34 PM
It's been stated before that a midlander married, or as good as married, a Seeker in the Alchemy quest line. 

In lore, interracial relationships are seen as odd or frowned upon more than same sex relationships in the eyes of society, so that may be an issue concerning some priests and/or priestesses. I could even consider it a plot point of the marriage: Finding someone to conduct the wedding.

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RE: Marriage: How do you handle it? |
#12
05-17-2015, 11:45 PM
It's been so long since I've done the quests for crafters and I snoozed through so many because I was sick of the grind...

That said, on the topic of finding someone willing to perform a marriage, I'd say that when an Ishgardian knight captain shows up at a chapel with a squad of knights and says that there will be a wedding, usually there's a wedding to follow.

On the other hand, the one wedding of my characters so far has been two Seekers, so...

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RE: Marriage: How do you handle it? |
#13
05-18-2015, 07:03 AM
Steel is having difficulty finding someone to stay around longer than a night in the sheets, so nevermind marriage.

She cry evrytiem. XD

Honestly, being married is the furthest thing from her mind. There's been plenty of other things to distract her from the whole matter of marriage, much as she'd like to be courted.

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RE: Marriage: How do you handle it? |
#14
05-18-2015, 08:50 AM
The Botany levequest "Caught in the Long Grass" mentions Sharlayan marriages...

Quote:A tinker called this dig a Sharlayan marriage: much suffering that culminates in charming offsprings and at least one death. It seemed baseless cheek at the time, but... Three naturalists have suffered broken bones this day. They must have tripped on the thick undergrowth; what else could it be?

... Which don't really sound like a fun thing...

(05-17-2015, 11:45 PM)Chris Ganale Wrote: That said, on the topic of finding someone willing to perform a marriage, I'd say that when an Ishgardian knight captain shows up at a chapel with a squad of knights and says that there will be a wedding, usually there's a wedding to follow.
Eh... not necessarily. At least possibly not in an Ishgardian chapel.

Ishgard seems to be very much a church-run state, where the priesthood has significantly more power than the knighthood. From what I got from the various quests in Coerthas, questioning/denying/defying the church is an unthinkable act, or at least one that's best done behind closed doors and in trusted company else you run the risk of being branded as an unbeliever, heathen, or (worse) a possible heretic. Even Haurchefant had to step carefully during the 30-something MSQ or risk being accused as a heretic (Guillaime's actual legitimacy to make such accusations at that point doesn't factor in).

If the attending priest said no (medieval Europe has many stories based around a priest denying a marriage because of lack of "recognized" permission/consent for the bride, to the dowry wasn't enough, to someone marrying below their station, to the priest not liking the family of one of the parties, to someone's position in the church was questionable, and to "God said 'No'"), it's likely that that could be the end of it. The couple could try to bounce around to various chapels until they found someone they could convince to carry out the ceremony, but the previous ones that said 'no' could come out of the woodwork and annul he wedding, call for the knight to put his/her spouse aside (especially if the spouse is "of lower class" or unbeliever/outsider), or even face excommunication or loss of station. Going outside Ishgard for a wedding, the wedding might not even be recognized back inside Ishgard.

*shrugs*

It's just speculation on my part.
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RE: Marriage: How do you handle it? |
#15
05-18-2015, 09:19 AM
Ignacius isn't interested in finding a lover.  He's pretty hyper-aware of what happens to loved ones when they end up on the wrong side of his profession.
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