
(Edit: changed subect line to better reflect the nature of my question)
Been working around here and there and after advancing through the thaumaturge questline it gave me an idea for a possible plot: my character has been trying to learn  how to use healing spells but has lots of trouble (similar to how Sylphie and her mother use their own energies and thus can shorten their lifespan) , however while the conjurer needs to "borow" from nature I remember reading somewhere that a thaumaturge uses his/her own inner ennergies  to meld the aether iinto spells. With that being said, is it possible lorewise for a character in this situation to be torn between these two schools of magic?
Granted I don´t want to make some sort of all powerfull archmage, but rather to show the struggle of realizing the correct choice for a pacifist between:
Wants to learn how to heal but has lots of trouble when using healing spells, sometimes to the point of exhaustion.
VS
Does not want to learn how to hurt others but realizes that offensive magic is much easier and not only it doesn´t take a toll on his body, but can even become intoxicated with the power he can weild.
That way instead of a traditional good vs evil plot it becomes more about wanting to do something vs being able to do something. So... ideas? thoughts? suggestions?.......cookies?
Been working around here and there and after advancing through the thaumaturge questline it gave me an idea for a possible plot: my character has been trying to learn  how to use healing spells but has lots of trouble (similar to how Sylphie and her mother use their own energies and thus can shorten their lifespan) , however while the conjurer needs to "borow" from nature I remember reading somewhere that a thaumaturge uses his/her own inner ennergies  to meld the aether iinto spells. With that being said, is it possible lorewise for a character in this situation to be torn between these two schools of magic?
Granted I don´t want to make some sort of all powerfull archmage, but rather to show the struggle of realizing the correct choice for a pacifist between:
Wants to learn how to heal but has lots of trouble when using healing spells, sometimes to the point of exhaustion.
VS
Does not want to learn how to hurt others but realizes that offensive magic is much easier and not only it doesn´t take a toll on his body, but can even become intoxicated with the power he can weild.
That way instead of a traditional good vs evil plot it becomes more about wanting to do something vs being able to do something. So... ideas? thoughts? suggestions?.......cookies?