The lalafell with mysterious green and orange eyes

[Tolka]

this is my first time Roleplaying  also my first time making a characters back story so if any one can give me tips or tell me what they think of my characters back story please do it would really help.

 

 

 

Name: Tolka Zolka

 

Race: Dunesfolk Lalafell

 

 

            Tolka was born with very powerful magic abilities.  WhenTolka was only 2 years old his parents were killed by an unknown force. As Tolkas father final words he told his friend Zolka who was a Plainsfolk lalafell who was visiting them at the time to raise Tolka as one of his own but before Zolka took Tolka to safety Tolka’s Father and mother used their magic to change Tolka’s eye color to their favorite color as a reminder of them and as their last gift they can give him. They made his right eye green to remember his mother and his left eye orange to remember his father. After that Zolka took Tolka to safety and brot him back to his home and raised him as one of his own.

 

 

 

        When Tolka was growing up he was treated as an outside because he was a Dunesfolk livingwith the plainsfolk and because he was born with powerful magic ablates he was not able to control it at all. So he tried giving up magic and learned to be an alchemist and was very skilled but he still wanted to use magic because Zolka would always tell him that his parents were very powerful mage.  Years later when Tolka was 15 he tried magicagain but he was still not able to control it when he tried healing magic he would somehow poisoning the people around him or thing would just blow up around him and people started to fear him so the only place he would feel safe/conformable was in the town’s library where he spent most of his time reading on how to control magic and the other types of magic.  A few years later when he was 19 when he wasreading and ancient book he found he by accident he summoned a BabyBehemoth Minion and after that he realized what he should do and that was to go to Limsa Lominsa andjoin the arcansit guild. So before he left he took Zolka’s First name and made it his sir name to pay respect to Zolka for taking care of him for all these years. So Tolka and his Baby Behemoth Minion that he named Meat becausewhen Tolka First saw him that was the first thing that popped up in his head.  Then he whent out to travel to Limsa Lominsa and join the arcanist guild.

(I added the Baby Behemoth Minion  that you get if you get the collectors edition because i thought that it would be cool to add to his story.)

[Teardrop]

Hi Tolka! Its wonderful that you are jumping right in to share with the community your creative works. If I could offer one suggestion, however, to aid in the enjoyment of your writing; perhaps you could clean up the errant coding permeating the script :blush:. Other than that, thanks for sharing!

 

*edit; you caught it, good job!*

[Khaze'to Zhwan]

Hey, welcome to the forums, good to see someone starting to RP.  Back story looking interesting.  I would suggest having a look at the RPC Mentorship Program found here for help with any particular area you feel you need help with.  Good luck developing your first character and once again. Welcome.

[PaperLife]

kool intro! I like the story about his eyes @_@ 

 

welcome!