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Ashe · **09-12-2015, 12:55 AM**

All the time...In my head I am apologizing for how I write Ashe all the time. Like "Sorry he just insulted you and bluntly told you you have no talent for xyz and that you should give up and go back to your day job as an unintelligent oppo oppo."Â
....Like, I don't think that. I may be thinking like "man, this character is awesome/funny/interesting," But my character wouldn't think so because of xyz prejudices he has against them...
I know some people have their characters similar to their real life personalities...for me, that is no fun....I like to branch away from myself as far as possible. Three out of my four characters are male...and I am not a man.

tl;dr yes, all the time. And I'm sorry if I rp with you in the future and Ashe is an asshat.

LiadansWhisper · **09-12-2015, 01:06 AM**

(09-12-2015, 12:19 AM)Cliodhna Eoghan Wrote:
(09-11-2015, 02:54 PM)LiadansWhisper Wrote: Yes. Â Sometimes I really don't like what my characters do or say, and I often worry that something my character does will make people angry or upset OOC.
bring it lia, i've been itching for her and clio to have a conflict filled rp.

far as clio herself when it's an issue, i usually shoot a tell saying she's gonna be a princess pita (pain in the ass) but no hard ooc feels <3

The thing is, I generally don't enjoy conflict RP. Â Sometimes it's necessary, but it's generally not something I seek out.

Verad · **09-12-2015, 01:41 AM**

(09-11-2015, 11:14 PM)Warren Castille Wrote:
Wikipedia Wrote:Metagaming is any strategy, action or method used in a game which transcends a prescribed ruleset, uses external factors to affect the game, or goes beyond the supposed limits or environment set by the game. Another definition refers to the game universe outside of the game itself.

Intentionally steering RP in a direction satisfactory to the player over the character counts as using external factors to affect a game.

This is fine. It's not actually a problem.

Caspar · **09-12-2015, 05:22 AM**

Hm, in the past and in general my rule has always been "play the character." However, there have been times when I felt constrained by my character's behavior into doing something that would clearly upset the players opposite me. Typically I just did it and apologized if they felt OOC upset about it, and that worked fine. I still feel that 9/10 times simply playing my character works because I can conceive of many choices they would make that could bring about fun RP. That being said, while I'd like to just say "if you don't like it, tough," and play the hardass, there is a particular episode in which I felt very, very bad for my character's actions IC, despite the fact that I felt not only were they reasonable, but the only reasonable way to react given the circumstances. It's because of this instance that given a choice between creating ill feeling and ruining an RP for someone, or playing the character exactly as I want them to be played, I'll take the former. Ideally this never needs to happen as I design characters to be flexible under such circumstances now, wherein all choices are appropriate IC and yet there is clearly one which will bother the other player the least.

Show Content

SpoilerI played an Exalted campaign in the past with a close friend of mine. For those of you who don't know, you play various demigods in a very high-powered fantasy setting. It's been a long time since I've played, but as I remember, normal humans in Creation are very weak and useless in the face of the spirits and champions commonly encountered in such a campaign. Like in a lot of White Wolf IP, internal party conflict is greatly encouraged by the proliferation of inimical factions among the Exalted. There are sub-factions as well within each group. Among the Lunar Exalted, who tend to be beast-transforming shamanistic types, who were once intended to be the allies and mates of the superhero-ish Solar Exalted, there is a philosophy which essentially is about making normal humans self-sufficient and free of Exalted influence. They acted as facilitators who infiltrated human society and manipulated the course of civilization, actions which the more individualistic Lunars resented, and the more elitist ones found pointless.

I played a doctor Lunar who believed fervently in this philosophy and taught conventional medicine to humans, who he felt closer to because of some bad blood between him and his fellow Exalts in the past. He felt that humans, who overcame disease on their own through ingenuity rather than superhuman constitution and the use of magical Essence, possessed "true" strength. He resented the Exalted, who made humans reliant on them through becoming saviors, but there was personal bias there as his initiation into his particular social circle of Lunars was very rushed due to reasons of expediency, and as such he felt used. All of this was very clear to the other players before the game started. I think though that perhaps they were under the impression that the Lunars were more akin to their portrayal in previous editions, which was considerably more barbaric. I actually found a lot of the other Lunar party members behaved in a lore-breaking manner, but I didn't call them on this because I felt it would injure their pride, given that this was my first game and they'd played characters in a years-long Exalted campaign.

It was probably a mistake to not consult with the other party members before making my character; the others healed plague-infested townsfolk and demanded worship and praise for it, using their supernatural Essence, and he opted for compounding medicine, expressing open contempt for them essentially forcing the townsfolk to praise them and their deities. From his perspective, he was essentially in a Lawful Evil group, making the humans sell their souls to obtain healing, which the doctor wanted to give for free in the form of knowledge. The other players, including the Storyteller, felt I was unnecessarily creating conflict, and though I apologized profusely for his crude words, they clearly were taking it very personally. When the ST felt stressed by the situation, she dissolved the campaign, and it sort of drove a wedge between us permanently.

While I felt that I was playing according to the lore and had kept the behavior out of OOC entirely, I'd have gladly made my character behave less hostile if it meant keeping the campaign together. I felt like the party was supposed to have philosophical conflict due to the mechanics being designed to reward it, and due to the lore of the setting, like every WW game. But my selfish decision to continue playing the character regardless of how bothered by it everyone else was really damaged the campaign. It would be great if we could all remain perfectly objective and never be hurt by IC conflict, but at the very least we should attempt to meet others halfway if the alternative is just not getting to play with them at all. (Assuming you do want to play with them, of course. If you don't care...)

That being said, I still do not think I was entirely in the wrong. My decision to play the character above all else was selfish and insensitive, and I regret it immensely. Yet at the same time, it was inappropriate for the other players to take the character's actions personally and guilt me for it deliberately OOC.

These days the only thing I feel guilty about is my character's stubbornness. It is not reasonable to expect a person who is as extreme as she is to change her ways overnight, but I still feel bad when Virara repeatedly relapses into familiar forms of behavior despite the efforts of others. I like for things to progress slowly and make small steps; but there is never a guarantee you will be able to see the end of a long series of RP, and that anxiety may make people want to rush the character development, I fear.

Diskwrite · **09-12-2015, 10:25 AM**

(09-12-2015, 01:41 AM)Verad Wrote:
(09-11-2015, 11:14 PM)Warren Castille Wrote:
Wikipedia Wrote:Metagaming is any strategy, action or method used in a game which transcends a prescribed ruleset, uses external factors to affect the game, or goes beyond the supposed limits or environment set by the game. Another definition refers to the game universe outside of the game itself.

Intentionally steering RP in a direction satisfactory to the player over the character counts as using external factors to affect a game.

This is fine. It's not actually a problem.

I don't think, in this regard, it is a problem either. It's one thing if it's being done in order to get something. But if you're doing it so that the RP thread doesn't upset your OOC partners? Then I think there's a place for it.

Such as, I don't tolerate my characters being sexually harassed. I have to deal with that stuff IRL, and I don't want to deal with it in-game. When it does happen in RP, sometimes I find myself deeply unsettled or upset. I don't want to deal with that when I'm engaging in the fun hobby of RP. So that's a boundary I draw. And once I communicate this, I expect my RP partners to follow it.

Another example- RP relationships. What if someone, for any reason, isn't comfortable OOC with some IC entanglement? As the person RPing with them, you'd have a responsibility to them. Now you'll need a good IC reason to break it off, or something along those lines.

RPers will have their own OOC limits and boundaries, and it is a responsibility, I think, of their RP partners to respect those. Even if that means nudging the characters in a different direction.

As I mentioned before, when I've done this, my character has made choices that were in-line with what they would do. It just might not have been their decision had I not intervened. But since I did this for the good of my RP partners, including people I've been friends with for years, I don't see anything wrong with this.

TheBlob · **09-12-2015, 11:08 AM**

Have I ever felt bad about something I've made my character do that falls in to how my character should and would behave?

No.Â

I have, however, been pissed off because something my character has said or done has driven someone from RP with me because that IC/OOC bleed starts for the other player and SometimesRudeBluntCharacterABC is now somehow Shannon.

I understand that if a character is offended or bullied by another they're going to distance themselves from the offending character. Being around abrasive people isn't fun, I really do get that. Your character doesn't like being around a character that's so fluent in foul language, great! Be offended ICly and act accordingly, I'm fine with the IC consequences.

However when the player refuses to let said offended character, or other alts, interact with an alt (of mine) because, "I'm in a bad place because you make my characters sad, I'd rather not involve myself with you." and then just completely ignores me and any interaction...screw you buddy, take the drama elsewhere. I'm an actor on a screen. Hate the character that's fine, don't hate -me-.Â

If something my character has done or has brought up something within yourself that you have issues with, that's something your character needs to deal with ICly how they would. You could even take the route of sending a tell along the lines of, "Hey I know you're not aware, but I'm not really comfortable with jokes about dead parents, it's a little too real for me."
While I can't say my character will be polite to yours she'll at least pull from another topic and we can go from there. Plus, I'll be happy to talk with you and look! Maybe we've made new friends OOCly!

Zac Evans · **09-12-2015, 12:32 PM**

I broke the rules of the Grindstone.

Zac's an in-the-moment fighter who takes every fight like it's life or death.

I lost soooo many potential friends and go soooo many people pissed at me, I'm still trying to smooth it all overÂ

;.;

LiadansWhisper · **09-12-2015, 01:29 PM**

(09-12-2015, 12:32 PM)Zac Evans Wrote:
I broke the rules of the Grindstone.

Zac's an in-the-moment fighter who takes every fight like it's life or death.

I lost soooo many potential friends and go soooo many people pissed at me, I'm still trying to smooth it all overÂ

;.;

Are they mad at you OOC or are they mad at you IC?

Makes sense if they're mad at you IC. Â If they're mad at you OOC, though, that sounds dumb and I'm not sure I'd want to be friends with people who can't separate OOC and IC.

Erik Mynhier · **09-12-2015, 01:54 PM**

The things, especially the morally objectionable things he has done in the service of the Flames, do not bother me or him ic. The ends justifies the means, its all for the greater good after all. On the surface he is a quiet man, but below he is a soldier following orders. Its his mindset that death and destruction for the sake of his adopted home is acceptable.

That said if I am rping with people outside my fc that may not see that side of him and it comes up, I pm them a short explanation and warn/ask them if its ok I am about to ver left into war-crimes land. If they would rather not I just don't, but more often then not their curiosity to see him in that mode gives me leve to go for it.

mongi291 · **09-12-2015, 03:07 PM**

The one time I decided to have Isaulde wear maidservant clothes to spy on nobles without being suspicious. I mean, it was worth it for me, because OH GOD THE LAUGHS but poor Isaulde took a low blow to her dignity. Especially when she went at the Ishgard Tavern Night. I had to go almost immediately but I was dying when she was mistaken as a courtesan.

Kou · **09-14-2015, 11:40 PM**

Currently, my only regret stems from the fact that my recently-impregnated character is alone, in Ishgard, without her bodyguard/father of her baby... and I'm setting up ways to cause a miscarriage.

Moreso, the regret is that she is awayÂ from the bodyguard, but that's also entirely out of my hands due to RL being RL.

I have faith that this is a horror she will overcome, however.

Aldotsk · **09-16-2015, 11:15 AM**

There's definitely bad decisions. I've made plenty, and if something bad happened - you can always talk to the person who you've RPed with to retcon or readjust something in the plot that you've made mistake on. Since IC and OOC are completely different thing. IC, your character is a fictional character and it can be adjusted to change the story. It's not always the best thing, but no IC should be labeled as reality or even to the point that it is OOC issue.

There is definitely lot of Grindstone dramas that lead to OOC. It wasn't the first.

But also, it's probably best to just communicate with the player OOCly to see what can be adjusted from the bad mistakes and try to work it out rather than keep winging it before it becomes a huge problem for you or that person to accept such consequences. (Not everyone likes sudden consequence result, and they want to plan it along)

Warren Castille · **09-16-2015, 11:31 AM**

(09-12-2015, 01:29 PM)LiadansWhisper Wrote:
(09-12-2015, 12:32 PM)Zac Evans Wrote:
I broke the rules of the Grindstone.

Zac's an in-the-moment fighter who takes every fight like it's life or death.

I lost soooo many potential friends and go soooo many people pissed at me, I'm still trying to smooth it all overÂ

;.;

Are they mad at you OOC or are they mad at you IC?

Makes sense if they're mad at you IC. Â If they're mad at you OOC, though, that sounds dumb and I'm not sure I'd want to be friends with people who can't separate OOC and IC.

To my knowledge, entirely IC. It's blown over for the most part, and even sparked some good RP in people only tangentially related.

(09-16-2015, 11:15 AM)Aldotsk Wrote: There is definitely lot of Grindstone dramas that lead to OOC. It wasn't the first.

Not nearly as much as you'd think.

Berrod Armstrong · **09-16-2015, 11:33 AM**

(09-12-2015, 12:32 PM)Zac Evans Wrote:
I broke the rules of the Grindstone.

Zac's an in-the-moment fighter who takes every fight like it's life or death.

I lost soooo many potential friends and go soooo many people pissed at me, I'm still trying to smooth it all overÂ

;.;

If I recall this was all IC!

Mia Moui · **09-21-2015, 02:54 PM**

I haven't been playing Mia long enough to have made too many bad decisions. Â She felt bad about killing a Giant Turtle for the gil it would bring. Â And she probably feels bad because every side job she takes is a distraction from her trying to find her sisters. Â But she can't look for sisters if she doesn't have money. Â Poor thing.

In other RP I've done a LOT of torturing of my characters both physically and mentally, depending on the lore or setting of the game. Â I had great fun doing this in ST:O, TSW, SW:TOR. Â I was less hard on my characters in Rift and Aion, those worlds were hard enough. Â And I feel the same about FFXIV. Â The world is designed to be brutal so I'd rather try to have my character see the silver lining. Â The exception was TSW since that world was dark and I had a dark character. Â I was in a bad mood.

I'd have to go pretty far back to think of character-based regrets. Â I have experienced the unfortunate side effect of being an unpleasant or villainous character (or one people love to hate but never want to RP with).

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