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Criticism welcomed


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Criticism welcomed
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ValkyrieRangrisv
ValkyrieRangris
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Criticism welcomed |
#1
03-24-2015, 06:46 PM
Okie posting the idea that I enjoy so far. Criticism is welcomed.
Last thread died before I start roleplaying just want to get some input.

History:
  • Valkyrie is the daughter of a farmer who has two sisters
  • Her mother died giving birth to her
  • Her two sisters are very talented and travel often
  • Her eldest sister is an archer
  • Her other sister is a blacksmith
  • Both of them are always traveling and her father is very proud of them
  • Valkyrie has no real goals in life and is very naive and innocent she loves her father despite him being a drunk and seeing her as burden
  • When her eldest sister came back from traveling she seemed to be struck by madness
  • The father hired a conjurer and the conjurer told the father that she had been over exposed by voidsent from being near the void gate
  • Valkyrie father urged her to follow him taking her to a secluded area
  • There Valkyrie father begged a voidsent to take Valkyrie and in return the voidsent would give some of its blood to save his daughter
  • The voidsent agreed and took Valkyrie back with it to the void
  • Valkyrie spent many years in the void but does not fully remember any of her past or time spent there only knowing that she was in the void
  • Valkyrie mind is very twisted from spending so much time in the void and has become corrupt
  • While she looks innocent for her to be able to remain in Eorzea she has to consume large amounts of Aether and be exposed to the void gate
  • She seems mentally stable and unaffected by her past events it is only a mask

    Personality:

  • Valkyrie seems very innocent and sweet the odd time she will say something that will throw everyone off making them think that there may be more to her than meets the eye.
  • She is very good at controlling the conversation and making others feel at ease. When she does put something on the table by mistake she is good at moving the conversation forward and making others not really look into the past words she had said.
  • She seems to be always plotting something.
  • People that once knew her before she was sent into the void would not be able to recognize her at all.
  • She is always smiling and sometimes her smile seems almost creepy.
  • She uses her looks to her advantage
  • She pretends to have a bit of a temper but it is only an act she puts on for others
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Messages In This Thread
Criticism welcomed - by ValkyrieRangris - 03-24-2015, 06:46 PM
RE: Criticism welcomed - by Warren Castille - 03-25-2015, 08:02 AM
RE: Criticism welcomed - by Berrod Armstrong - 03-25-2015, 08:12 AM
RE: Criticism welcomed - by ValkyrieRangris - 03-25-2015, 05:21 PM
RE: Criticism welcomed - by Alothia - 03-25-2015, 08:31 AM
RE: Criticism welcomed - by T'caska Khevo - 03-25-2015, 08:47 AM
RE: Criticism welcomed - by Nebbs - 03-25-2015, 09:25 AM
RE: Criticism welcomed - by Jaliqai - 03-25-2015, 12:29 PM

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