(05-14-2015, 09:34 PM)Zyrusticae Wrote: I am personally of the view that this sort of thing is better classed as 'personality traits' than 'mental illnesses' (hence why I put 'mental illnesses' in quotes), because they are extremely difficult to overcome and change, pretty much in the same way trying to change your personality is extremely difficult especially if you are already a functional adult. I would also much rather people see these traits as endearing rather than as crippling defects that must be cured, because, obviously, the latter is much more damaging especially to my self-esteem than the former.
I'm just going to say that pretty much fits the definition of "mental illness." Like it or not, it's a part of you that's been ingrained into your personality and being and that's a difficult to change. Overcoming mental illness is not easy. The line between "personality" and "illness" is drawn when something becomes objectively debilitating to your life and brings pain to you and those around you, and makes it difficult to see to your health and function as a member of society. Being a little shy =/= social anxiety if it doesn't bother you and/or if you weren't actually properly diagnosed.
Anyway, like most things in writing, if you want to do it effectively, it's all about balance. If you're trying really hard for others to find your character "endearing," you'll probably just annoy them. Plus, as someone who suffers from anxiety and other mental illness irl, I can easily understand why some people might not find it "endearing" at all to begin with. Sure, a stuttering, blushing, shy character sounds cute on the surface. The reality of actual social anxiety, however, is not the least bit cute, glamorous, or endearing.
On the other hand, though, no one likes a woobie, so trying really hard to get people to pity your character also may not be the best choice. You should focus more on how you want to play your character, not so much on how you want others to receive and treat him/her. Ultimately, trying to railroad other role-players into how they should feel and think about your character will likely annoy them.