Half the time I have absolutely no idea if I'm walking into a minefield, if I end up breaking some unspoken rule that involves roleplaying. And worse still, not knowing that I broke that rule to splinters, threw it out the window and set it on fire as well.
It fuels a fuckton of anxiety whenever I try to approach people for rp. More to the point I know how much of a pancake I am and how inconsistent is an understatement about Kurt. I want this, no wait I want that. Took a step back, took a deep breath. Rewrote him to varying degrees. Like write > scrap > write again. I've settled on a nice little idea on how to clean him up.
But wait, is he good enough? Can I present him well enough? All the changes under the hood? Hell would things go back to the way they were of 5min rl exchange before I get swept under the rug and out of someone's mind? Do I even present an interesting skillset?
I guess that also comes with the 'I don't know what to do with him' package. Sure he's starting to take up Thaumaturgy and work on one of his handicaps. But how many people would be interested in a little adventure with him? How many would even want to go out there and do something?
Then there's me. Am I writing well enough? It's not stale is it? This idea? Too much? Too little? Is it over what your character would do? Are you sure you just don't feel forced to tag along? I'm not overbearing? Am I talking too much? I'm probably talking too much.
*Random character looks at me* Oh god they're judging me! Oh god they probably know how much a trainwreck Kurt is! Oh god they probably don't want to rp with me. Roleplayer-senpai notice meeeeeeee </3
I'm also afraid I'm blind to the people reaching out to me. Earnest attempts to get me involved with something and that I'm probably looking stupidly ungrateful.
Do you like McDonald's? I like McDonald's. Can I have you number? Can I? Please? Have? Your number? Is there ice cream in the fridge?
tl;dr Overthinking.
It fuels a fuckton of anxiety whenever I try to approach people for rp. More to the point I know how much of a pancake I am and how inconsistent is an understatement about Kurt. I want this, no wait I want that. Took a step back, took a deep breath. Rewrote him to varying degrees. Like write > scrap > write again. I've settled on a nice little idea on how to clean him up.
But wait, is he good enough? Can I present him well enough? All the changes under the hood? Hell would things go back to the way they were of 5min rl exchange before I get swept under the rug and out of someone's mind? Do I even present an interesting skillset?
I guess that also comes with the 'I don't know what to do with him' package. Sure he's starting to take up Thaumaturgy and work on one of his handicaps. But how many people would be interested in a little adventure with him? How many would even want to go out there and do something?
Then there's me. Am I writing well enough? It's not stale is it? This idea? Too much? Too little? Is it over what your character would do? Are you sure you just don't feel forced to tag along? I'm not overbearing? Am I talking too much? I'm probably talking too much.
*Random character looks at me* Oh god they're judging me! Oh god they probably know how much a trainwreck Kurt is! Oh god they probably don't want to rp with me. Roleplayer-senpai notice meeeeeeee </3
I'm also afraid I'm blind to the people reaching out to me. Earnest attempts to get me involved with something and that I'm probably looking stupidly ungrateful.
Do you like McDonald's? I like McDonald's. Can I have you number? Can I? Please? Have? Your number? Is there ice cream in the fridge?
tl;dr Overthinking.
![[Image: kUDtE6X.png]](http://i.imgur.com/kUDtE6X.png)
![[Image: zyWzbVR.png]](http://i.imgur.com/zyWzbVR.png)
