RPC has moved! These pages have been kept for historical purposes

Yumi Natsuo · **12-15-2013, 10:18 PM**

There was a day that was not unlike any other day where I had found myself sitting on one of the many railings of one of the many platforms in Limsa that hung over the beautiful deep ocean below. I remember the way that my eyes had scanned the surface trying to look for breaks in the waves to see as far down into the unknown as I possibly could. All that welcomed me was darkness, an unclear picture of the things that remain and exist in the depths of such a vast body of water. I wonder how long I had been sitting there reflecting on such matters before I began to question if I was subconsciously reflecting on my own self?

If there is anything that I had learned during my short and violent life it is that there is no such thing as a coincidence in this world. There are far too many factors, far too many entities in the world, for anything to happen simply because. There was a time when I did not believe in such things as fate or a predestined future, words like that simply had made me laugh! The truth of the matter - and I know this all too well - is that they do exist in this life. The road that we are meant to travel is always traveled by us, one way or another, and it is difficult to stray from the path that has been laid out before you to walk. I am not a lamb to be guided along by a shepard, I am not some weak and helpless animal that needs to be leashed and domesticated to survive. I am not going to succumb to the truth of this world and let my feet travel in a direction I don't want them to go. I will fight it, I will fight the entire world and the nature of things if I Â have to, my resolve will be far too clean and honed for fate and predestined future to control.

I will be damned until the day that I die if I ever let myself listen to the words of another or let myself be taken care of by another individual! I am not some weak and little kitten that cannot defend or think for themselves, I am not incapable of making my own conscious decisions or understand the risks that I take on a daily basis. I do not need my hand held, I do not need to be babied, I do not need any advice, and I definitely do not need someone else in my life. I'm not looking for something so trivial from someone, weak emotions such as those will not help me in the slightest! All those emotions ever do is bog you down, make you weak, turn you into some sad and pathetic creature that isn't even a shadow of your former self. I have seen what a sensitive heart can do to a strong person with my own two eyes, I have seen the kind of misery and kind of weakness that comes from opening yourself up to another, and I am far too smart and keen on such matters to throw myself into such a hell.

A Lame Leatherbound Journal

RPC has moved! These pages have been kept for historical purposes