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Edgar · **10-20-2015, 11:29 AM**

(10-20-2015, 09:08 AM)Sylentmana Wrote:
(10-19-2015, 10:54 PM)Martiallais Wrote: Why humanity? Why?

http://terribleminds.com/ramble/2015/10/...s-boycott/

I just..I don't even know where to start on this LOL. Â

Wow. I didn't even know this was a thing. On the plus side, the movie looks like it might actually be pretty good.

The movie doesn't have enough Gungans in it.

Martiallais · **10-20-2015, 11:38 AM**

(10-20-2015, 11:29 AM)Edgar Wrote:
(10-20-2015, 09:08 AM)Sylentmana Wrote:
(10-19-2015, 10:54 PM)Martiallais Wrote: Why humanity? Why?

http://terribleminds.com/ramble/2015/10/...s-boycott/

I just..I don't even know where to start on this LOL. Â

Wow. I didn't even know this was a thing. On the plus side, the movie looks like it might actually be pretty good.

The movie doesn't have enough Gungans in it.

[Image: forceawakensjarjarposter.jpg?w=600]

You were saying?

Vyce · **10-20-2015, 11:38 AM**

I hate:

People who are in front of me and walk at a slower pace than my default pace.

People who stand on the wrong side of the escalator.

When you have to wipe like 20 times after a poop.

People who complain in restaurants.

That "can I speak to a manager" hair.

Media standards of how gay men should be represented i.e. Martha Stewart, or perfect model with perfect body. This is too much pressure and I don't like having to live up to it every day.

Tumblr Feminist Extremism

"I'm a Wiccan"

Spiders.

Sylentmana · **10-20-2015, 01:36 PM**

(10-20-2015, 11:38 AM)Vyce Wrote: I hate:

When you have to wipe like 20 times after a poop.

Real classy there Vyce. Tongue

Vyce · **10-20-2015, 01:51 PM**

(10-20-2015, 01:36 PM)Sylentmana Wrote:
(10-20-2015, 11:38 AM)Vyce Wrote: I hate:

When you have to wipe like 20 times after a poop.

Real classy there Vyce.

But you have to agree the most fanciful occurrence is when you poop and the toilet paper comes back clean.

Kage · **10-20-2015, 02:02 PM**

The poop conversations can go somewhere that's not my thread. Thanks.

Vyce · **10-20-2015, 02:13 PM**

Also, I hate the following stereotypes:

The weird, over the top "spechul snowflake"
[Image: bruno.png]

The drama queen
[Image: kurt1_t.png]

The housewife
[Image: 6689613.jpg]

And possibly the most damaging one:

The circuit queen

[Image: matineegroupbeachwear1sc9.jpg]

Physical appearance and sexual performance define you. Your value is based on how you look and what you wear. You are afforded special privileges for your appearance but for only as long as they last. You are expected to balance the physical expectations commonly held over women's heads with the social expectations held over men's heads. Be beautiful AND sexual. Even your income is based on how well you handle what society expects of you, and the better you look, the more likely others are to accept your differences.

I won't pretend that I'm not guilty of it. It's a double standard, really. I hate that I'm expected to be a certain way, but I look down on those that don't or don't care enough to try. It's been sewn into me from day 1. Honestly I'd like to see gay culture represent itself more realistically, but there's no reward for average in the media.

tl;dr its too much work being pretty

Sylentmana · **10-20-2015, 03:14 PM**

(10-20-2015, 02:13 PM)Vyce Wrote: The circuit queen

Physical appearance and sexual performance define you. Your value is based on how you look and what you wear. You are afforded special privileges for your appearance but for only as long as they last. You are expected to balance the physical expectations commonly held over women's heads with the social expectations held over men's heads. Be beautiful AND sexual. Even your income is based on how well you handle what society expects of you, and the better you look, the more likely others are to accept your differences.

I won't pretend that I'm not guilty of it. It's a double standard, really. I hate that I'm expected to be a certain way, but I look down on those that don't or don't care enough to try. It's been sewn into me from day 1. Honestly I'd like to see gay culture represent itself more realistically, but there's no reward for average in the media.

tl;dr its too much work being pretty

Is that supposed to be a modern example of masculine beauty? It seems kinda gross to me.

Vyce · **10-20-2015, 03:38 PM**

Kindof. Here is a more "normal" standard of beauty circa 2015:

[Image: ideal-man.jpg]

But the bar is further raised when every piece of advertising geared toward you is meant to be superlative. Think of it like how Victoria's Secret advertises, except it's EVERYTHING.

Sylentmana · **10-20-2015, 03:47 PM**

(10-20-2015, 03:38 PM)Vyce Wrote: Kindof. Here is a more "normal" standard of beauty circa 2015:

But the bar is further raised when every piece of advertising geared toward you is meant to be superlative. Think of it like how Victoria's Secret advertises, except it's EVERYTHING.

I've never really paid much attention to men's fashion. I kinda dress like my grandfather or just wear a collared shirt and a pair of jeans. The only time this sort of emphasis on men's appearance bothers me is when people bug me about not being all muscled.

I do hate our modern society's glorification of tattoos. I don't understand why people like them so much and I'm sick of people giving me the business because I don't want my skin inked up.

Khoure · **10-20-2015, 04:50 PM**

((NOTE: NOT INTENDED TO CREATE A POLITICAL DISCUSSION. JUST A SPECIFIC INSTANCE THAT BOTHERED ME PERSONALLY THAT HAPPENS TO BE TIED INTO SOCIAL ISSUES AT LARGE. ))

one time in this forum about mass effect ppl were talking about if you dated the human option in ME1 and someone else in ME2 (the same romance isn't an option because they weren't in the crew in second game), your ME1 romance will bring it up when they join the party in ME3.

people were saying how, it's sexist that if you pick male protagonist, you have some option to tell your love interest off because they weren't there for you in ME2 and were actually pretty against you and you shouldn't have had to wait for them like that. But if you pick the female protagonist, you either didn't have that conversation option at all, or it was more limited (i forget cause i never played ME3). Basically, both genders are supposed to be the same character, and yet the man gets to justify his 'cheating' while the woman does not.

So we were saying how that was yeah, pretty fair and definitely a little sexist. Then this person comes on spouting about how we were being so mean to the poor writers and how we needed "real" evidence about the writer as an actual person to "convict" him of being sexist, otherwise we were just baselessly pointing fingers and apparently accusing someone of sexism with reasonable but not absolute certainty is far worse than a person actually being so.

supposedly, the reason that this piece of writing can't be proven as sexist is because we don't know every detail of how it came to be. One of this person's suggested reasonings was literally "the female voice actor was having a bad day and couldn't record her lines" like yikes this person was reaching far.

LiadansWhisper · **10-20-2015, 05:00 PM**

(10-20-2015, 03:38 PM)Vyce Wrote: Kindof. Here is a more "normal" standard of beauty circa 2015:

But the bar is further raised when every piece of advertising geared toward you is meant to be superlative. Think of it like how Victoria's Secret advertises, except it's EVERYTHING.

So a long time ago I joined a guild in WoW called Taint. Â I joined to raid. Â I had no idea what the word meant, other than like, someone was tainted. Â Turns out it has other meanings, but I digress.

I also didn't know as lil' white bread, sheltered Southern girl me that I was joining the largest LBGT guild in WoW. Seriously, they had over 4,000 members. Â Everyone else apparently knew, but I didn't!

It was awesome. Â ^_^

But one of the things I was surprised to discover was how much emphasis is often put on physical appearance in different circles of gay men. Â They even had names for the groups or cliques or whatever. Â The only one I can remember off the top of my head was the "bears." Â Anyway, the groups basically delineated what sort of guy was attractive to the guys in each group. Â I had never heard of this previously, even though I had several gay friends. Â I figure it's kind of like how women don't always discuss the same things in front of guys that they will discuss with other women, etc.

So any way, my point is that there's a huge variance in what is considered "attractive" in every group. Â There was one group, name I can't recall, that wouldn't find the super muscled guys attractive at all, and another group where hyper-masculinity was THE biggest attraction. Â I think that in every brand of sexuality, there are different things that people are attracted to.

The moral of the story is...don't look at fashion magazines, they will only make you feel ugly. Â Frustrated

Vyce · **10-20-2015, 06:19 PM**

You hit the nail on the head; Lia. It is socially acceptable in the gay community to group others based on physical features. Here is the basic breakdown:

Twinks: The young cuties. Usually 16-25 before your more masculine adult features fill in. Men of certain genetics can be twinks all the way into their thirties.
Twinks are expected to be virtually hairless, lean, and easy. They often wear skinny jeans.

Bears: Big hairy guys. You classify as a bear around age 30 with some extra weight. Subgrouos are Otters/skinny hairy guys, Cubs/big hairy young guys, Pandas/asian bears.

Daddies: Over 40 and interested in Twinks. Expected to be financially supportive andexperienced.

Twunks: These are your young guys who play sports and have killer bodies. They are expected to make money, do porn/model, become bartenders, and get invited to places as eye candy. They are valued as decoration.

Mom: This is your older gay man who babies everyone and is available for advice, but is expected to die alone.

Age 60 is considered gay death. 50 if your genese arent great.

Basically, whether you like it or not, you are classified.

Vyce · **10-20-2015, 06:35 PM**

Theres three more important ones I forgot.

Fem: Called "Fishy" in drag/ballroom scenes. This is a man who acts and/or sounds effeminate. Think the esthetician.

Masc: Deep voice, traditionally male features. Probably pretends not to like Beyonce. Gay Ala Mighans. A subset is Butch Queen, who has the look but runs in the club scene and likes vodka and divas.

Trade: Trade is a commercially attractive man who is either in the closet or is unintelligible from straight men. Probably even likes to go hunting. The difference between Masc and Trade is that Trade is effortlessly masculine and extremely attractive always. Ser Aymeric would be trade.

Edit:
It is easy to say, "Just dont live by labels. Just ignore it." But that is far easier said than done.

I thought of a way to explain this last night:

Imagine you are walking along, minding your own business, when someone shouts, "I LOST THE GAME!". Now, nobody plays that anymore. Nobody wants to care. But while you can say out loud that you do not play the game, there is still that little subtext in your head that acknowledges you too have lost the game. You can't not play- you play by knowing the rules. It is permanently carved into your subconscious.

So while I can say I do not subscribe to these labels, it remains a fact that I know the rules of each label and therefor know where I stand in comparison to others.

Sylentmana · **10-21-2015, 08:56 AM**

Sadly, labels and social hierarchy are a significant part of the human species and will likely never go away. I've been fairly able to avoid it affecting me, but I'm a very withdrawn person who usually avoids people and doesn't participate in social media beyond a few forums such as this. Even still, I know I'm being/been labeled by someone somewhere. It doesn't bother me because I won't let it.

Any advice I could give you, Vyce, would be derived from my own experiences and probably won't reflect your own and would therefore be useless to you. Perhaps the best advice you could get would come from Tyrion Lannister: "Never forget what you are, for surely the world will not. Make it your strength. Then it can never be your weakness. Armor yourself in it, and it will never be used to hurt you."

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