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Ilwe'ran · **12-19-2013, 01:48 PM**

(12-19-2013, 11:36 AM)Evie Wrote: If things happen RPly that you don't like, walk away. If someone tries to force you to RP, blacklist them. If they continue in the RP despite saying stop report them for harassment. There are so many things that you can do to protect yourself against harassing RP. If someone tries to get you to do something you don't want ret-con meeting that character and have it as if it never happens. You draw the lines and there should be NO WAY possible for someone to force you to RP something you don't want to.

As long as there is a "victim" in any case when it's RP, the victim should give his consent OOC. That's my own opinion.
Unfortunatly we're not in a situation where you can protect yourself that easily when your char is a "victim" and it's not that because you can /blist those people that it's not disturbing. For me it's only about respect and some people forget that and are quite selfish in their attitude.

(12-19-2013, 11:36 AM)Evie Wrote:
(12-19-2013, 04:35 AM)Ilwe Wrote: I find quite disturbing that the one who is (in the end) looking for some female Seeker only did answer after 3 days and 32 messages.

Also with this you are assuming that the person, Karaan, who wants the female characters in the end actually checks this website regularly. Maybe he doesn't and only got on because someone mentioned it to him.

With this I assume that Karaan should have made that thread himself and/or being crystal clear at the very begining with R'mah about what he wanted to do with those female Seeker since it's HIS responsability.

C'kayah Polaali · **12-19-2013, 02:12 PM**

(12-19-2013, 01:48 PM)Ilwe Wrote: As long as there is a "victim" in any case when it's RP, the victim should give his consent OOC. That's my own opinion.
Unfortunatly we're not in a situation where you can protect yourself that easily when your char is a "victim" and it's not that because you can /blist those people that it's not disturbing. For me it's only about respect and some people forget that and are quite selfish in their attitude.

I don't think this is that sort of situation at all. RP always requires consent, either implicit or explicit. Without consent, it's merely trolling masquerading as RP, and that's a different animal entirely.

(That's not entirely true. Some MMOs - most famously probably Eve Online - are built entirely around non-consensual PVP. Final Fantasy is most certainly not that sort of game, though)

Ilwe'ran · **12-19-2013, 02:44 PM**

Well no, I don't think so. When I meet some new RPer, I don't pm them before saying hello and joining the discussion. Of course there are some limits but I think most of us are open to RP most of time, unless people just try to hurt you in any manner.
I'm talking here about RP, not troll and stuff, just about 2 people that wanna RP together. Nothing more.

Magellan · **12-19-2013, 02:48 PM**

(12-19-2013, 02:12 PM)Ckayah Tia Wrote: I don't think this is that sort of situation at all. RP always requires consent, either implicit or explicit. Without consent, it's merely trolling masquerading as RP, and that's a different animal entirely.

(That's not entirely true. Some MMOs - most famously probably Eve Online - are built entirely around non-consensual PVP. Final Fantasy is most certainly not that sort of game, though)

Implicit consent is a slippery slope that leads to situations exactly like the one that is being debated. Dark and manipulative rp can lead to characters becoming broken and unplayable (as has happened to me), and suck the fun out of the entire process.

After finding out an IC friend (and I thought OOC friend) was scheming to rape one of my characters without consent, I was faced with retconning entire months worth of rp, or putting that character on the shelf for awhile (I chose the latter).

People can be inconsiderate and rude when planning these types of stories, and OOC communication is VITAL to avoid any sort of backlash or misunderstanding (both of which have happened in this thread) Your actions DO impact the enjoyment of those around you, sometimes ruining
what had been a very enjoyable endeavor to that point.

I have seen it often where people get so wrapped up in telling their stories that they crash through other people's stories with the grace of a wrecking ball.(cue Miley Cyrus)

LiadansWhisper · **12-19-2013, 02:49 PM**

(12-19-2013, 02:44 PM)Ilwe Wrote: Well no, I don't think so. When I meet some new RPer, I don't pm them before saying hello and joining the discussion. Of course there are some limits but I think most of us are open to RP most of time, unless people just try to hurt you in any manner.
I'm talking here about RP, not troll and stuff, just about 2 people that wanna RP together. Nothing more.

I think that there's a language gap here.

By advertising in this thread, the OP made it fairly clear what the characters were for. Â Only those actually interested in such RP would obviously respond, and since the OP (and others) have explained the situation, that's OOC consent.

LiadansWhisper · **12-19-2013, 02:53 PM**

(12-19-2013, 02:48 PM)Magellan Wrote: Implicit consent is a slippery slope that leads to situations exactly like the one that is being debated. Dark and manipulative rp can lead to characters becoming broken and unplayable (as has happened to me), and suck the fun out of the entire process.

After finding out an IC friend (and I thought OOC friend) was scheming to rape one of my characters without consent, I was faced with retconning entire months worth of rp, or putting that character on the shelf for awhile (I chose the latter).

You had another option. Â Telling the player, "No. Â Not just no, but fuck no. Â Get bent." Â If that seems too harsh for you, please, by all means, contact me and I will be your angry ball of angry and tell them for you. Â I promise to leave most of their face intact when I'm done. Â Angel

Quote:People can be inconsiderate and rude when planning these types of stories, and OOC communication is VITAL to avoid any sort of backlash or misunderstanding (both of which have happened in this thread) Your actions DO impact the enjoyment of those around you, sometimes ruining
what had been a very enjoyable endeavor to that point.

Absolutely, although the adage of ICA = ICC does apply. Â On the one hand, I do believe in fading to black if something is overwhelming. Â On the other hand, unless the antagonist is willing to also accept the consequences (which might end up ending his or her character!), it's not worth it, really. Â Seriously, if someone is doing something to your character, or expresses a desire to do something to your character that you simply cannot handle, tell them no, and walk away. Â Has nothing to do with retconning and everything to do with your fun.

Quote:I have seen it often where people get so wrapped up in telling their stories that they crash through other people's stories with the grace of a wrecking ball.(cue Miley Cyrus)

That just means they're assholes, nothing more, nothing less.

C'kayah Polaali · **12-19-2013, 03:12 PM**

(12-19-2013, 02:53 PM)LiadansWhisper Wrote:
(12-19-2013, 02:48 PM)Magellan Wrote: Implicit consent is a slippery slope that leads to situations exactly like the one that is being debated. Dark and manipulative rp can lead to characters becoming broken and unplayable (as has happened to me), and suck the fun out of the entire process.

After finding out an IC friend (and I thought OOC friend) was scheming to rape one of my characters without consent, I was faced with retconning entire months worth of rp, or putting that character on the shelf for awhile (I chose the latter).

You had another option. Â Telling the player, "No. Â Not just no, but fuck no. Â Get bent." Â If that seems too harsh for you, please, by all means, contact me and I will be your angry ball of angry and tell them for you. Â I promise to leave most of their face intact when I'm done. Â

This. So much this.

I don't mean to make light of the subject, but how is it any different than someone scheming to murder your one of your characters without your consent?Â
I mean, if that same person was planning on killing your character, would you be faced with the choice of either retconning months worth of RP or setting the character aside? No. You'd have the (well-established) choices of also saying "Sorry, nope. I don't agree", or acting out the fight and defending your character successfully. A rape scheme is really no different:

A: "My dear man, now you're mine, whether you like it or not." *stalks B, club in hand*
B: "A! How could you! I trusted you!" *whips out a knife and menaces A while circling around towards the door*

Evie · **12-19-2013, 03:42 PM**

(12-19-2013, 03:12 PM)Ckayah Tia Wrote:
(12-19-2013, 02:53 PM)LiadansWhisper Wrote:
(12-19-2013, 02:48 PM)Magellan Wrote: Implicit consent is a slippery slope that leads to situations exactly like the one that is being debated. Dark and manipulative rp can lead to characters becoming broken and unplayable (as has happened to me), and suck the fun out of the entire process.

After finding out an IC friend (and I thought OOC friend) was scheming to rape one of my characters without consent, I was faced with retconning entire months worth of rp, or putting that character on the shelf for awhile (I chose the latter).

You had another option. Â Telling the player, "No. Â Not just no, but fuck no. Â Get bent." Â If that seems too harsh for you, please, by all means, contact me and I will be your angry ball of angry and tell them for you. Â I promise to leave most of their face intact when I'm done. Â
This. So much this.

I don't mean to make light of the subject, but how is it any different than someone scheming to murder your one of your characters without your consent?Â
I mean, if that same person was planning on killing your character, would you be faced with the choice of either retconning months worth of RP or setting the character aside? No. You'd have the (well-established) choices of also saying "Sorry, nope. I don't agree", or acting out the fight and defending your character successfully. A rape scheme is really no different:

A: "My dear man, now you're mine, whether you like it or not." *stalks B, club in hand*
B: "A! How could you! I trusted you!" *whips out a knife and menaces A while circling around towards the door*

Another option instead of putting your character on the shelf, ret-conning, or telling them to get bent, or doing the RP and defending yourself and kicking his ass (I particularly like this option best), you can turn that character into an NPC in your story. Keep everything up until that point, but now instead of that person playing the character it's an NPC. Or if you don't want to do that, write an excuse for why that person is no longer around ( I know that yes they still are but they aren't someone you'd be RPing with anymore), they could go on a journey in order to "find themselves" or they were sent to the front lines or may other things. Or, I mean the person wasn't willing to discuss things with you, so you could even go so far as to say they died in a tragic accident while fighting the Garleans.

There are so many options in response to any situation. Don't let someone ruin your fun by putting the character on a shelf. You RP to enjoy yourself. So enjoy yourself and to hell with anyone who tries to ruin your fun.

Tla · **12-19-2013, 03:55 PM**

(12-19-2013, 02:49 PM)LiadansWhisper Wrote:
(12-19-2013, 02:44 PM)Ilwe Wrote: Well no, I don't think so. When I meet some new RPer, I don't pm them before saying hello and joining the discussion. Of course there are some limits but I think most of us are open to RP most of time, unless people just try to hurt you in any manner.
I'm talking here about RP, not troll and stuff, just about 2 people that wanna RP together. Nothing more.

I think that there's a language gap here.

By advertising in this thread, the OP made it fairly clear what the characters were for. Â Only those actually interested in such RP would obviously respond, and since the OP (and others) have explained the situation, that's OOC consent.

Mh I think the misunderstanding here is the OP didn't specify the purpose, just said "you know what I mean wink wink nudge nudge" and "I don'tknow what the Nunh has planned for them". I guess those who answered positively, or at least some of them, weren't expecting slavery and such. Just doing a wild guess that if the topic was about "selling slaves etc" like some others, all this mess wouldn't have been here to begin with. *shrugs*

Magellan · **12-19-2013, 04:06 PM**

Those are all rather helpful suggestions all :p

What I ended up doing was along the lines of npcing involved parties and writing them out, and moving on ^^

But my point is I think people initially got up in arms over the lack of clear communication here, which has since been remedied. Maybe they had had similar experiences to mine and were merely trying to protect fellow rpers *shrug*

And maybe they were taking the IC story personally. I've seen villain types struggle before in this community (exact opposite of my last community), and there have been a number of threads on this site detailing the lack of unsavory characters.

Ilwe'ran · **12-19-2013, 04:36 PM**

I think my very first message was clear about this topic. My last message was just answering to C'kayah Tia.
And for me, no, the first page was obviously NOT clear at all even for the one that made the thread. Even more with all those implied such as :

(12-15-2013, 11:38 PM)R Wrote:
(12-15-2013, 02:49 PM)LandStander Wrote: I have considered making a Nunh character and just going around and challenging all the other Nunh's and stealing their ladies so that he could have an army of cat ladies at his command to send out and crush his enemies!!

I dont think one 'man' could satisfy an army. They would run out of bullets.

crowmeleon · **12-20-2013, 05:07 PM**

I think it's only proper etiquette to contact someone OOC for permission before you do anything that may cause their character serious and/or long-term harm. Whether it be physical or psychological. At least until you know them better and have explicitly discussed what they're comfortable with. I've dealt of in what I suppose would be considered... Alternative roleplay, and I find the best policy is to talk talk talk talk. Let the other person know that at any point they're uncomfortable they need only say and we can redirect the rp, or even stop completely if that's what's necessary.Â

It's already been stated, but always remember:

-You're never obligated to rp anything you're not comfortable with.
-You're never obligated to rp with anyone you don't want to.
-You don't owe anyone anything at any time.Â

This post is probably unnecessary but it really upsets me to imagine someone forcing themselves to rp something they're uncomfortable with just because they think they have to- Or worse, because they don't realize they can communicate their feelings OOC. Please don't ever do that to yourself.

Gabineaux · **12-21-2013, 12:37 AM**

I'm impressed the mods left this up, considering erotic content is against the rules. I mean, it's suggestive enough. There's a final fantasy section on Darknest, y'know.

LiadansWhisper · **12-21-2013, 04:16 AM**

(12-21-2013, 12:37 AM)Augustine Frost Wrote: I'm impressed the mods left this up, considering erotic content is against the rules. I mean, it's suggestive enough. There's a final fantasy section on Darknest, y'know.

There's no erotic content in this thread. Â Might try reading the thing first. Â :-\

Val · **12-21-2013, 06:43 AM**

Faye, Liadan, and Naih'ir pretty much all said anything I would give as far as my opinion goes.

Also, R'mah also stated that she interpreted what Karaan said wrong in the first place--or it was at least misunderstood. Having known Karaan for some time, I too can also stand by the fact that he is a fine individual and would not do something like was originally portrayed in the first post.

I will say, however, that his first language is not English and it can be and is very easy to misunderstand and misinterpret what he means.

And also: ...Even if someone actually was doing this? Who cares? Is it encroaching on your RP? Are you being forced to RP it? Is it publicly being done in front of you so you're forced to watch it? Do you have an ignore button?

..Then wtf?

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