
So I suppose I’ve been meaning to write about these thing for a while. They’ve been on my mind, but I’ve been letting them fade to the back, trying to not let them bother me. But the dreams didn’t help to quell my fears, and so I suppose I will write about them.
I am torn about how I feel about Deirdre. There are things that I greatly admire about her. And there are things that I do not understand. Why did she attempt to kill Fearless? Why did nothing happen to her? And then there are things that worry me. I am worried that she will be the downfall of my relationship. She’s always there. When I cannot be there, it seems that she is. And apparently she has “offered†things…and it should bother me. Just as knowing that she is in his dreams should bother me. I don’t want to be that girl. I don’t want to be the one who is always jealous and full of angst. And so I let it go. Maybe writing this down will help.
I am worried about Corvus. Our meeting turned into a call for diplomacy. Why? It’s not as if we are fighting city-states. We are two organizations within Eorzea. We may need each others help in the future. So why do we seem to be at each other’s throats? I don’t know. I know that I am friends with all of them, and the constant bickering between my people only serves to aggravate me. I want it to be over and done with. And so, I am going to do this trip with the company no matter what. It should serve to bring us closer together. Maybe then I can teach them that we all need to work together. I understand their points, but at what point do we stop standing up for ourselves and start being whiny, instigating, children?
I’m worried about my future. What it might mean. I have my company. What if at some point I have to give it up? Have to give up the family that I have built for myself?
I’m worried about being alone. What if that happens? What if I lose everything? Then where will I be?
I don’t know. I don’t even know if writing this down will help. I’m just rambling now aren’t I? I suppose I will end this entry here.Â
I am torn about how I feel about Deirdre. There are things that I greatly admire about her. And there are things that I do not understand. Why did she attempt to kill Fearless? Why did nothing happen to her? And then there are things that worry me. I am worried that she will be the downfall of my relationship. She’s always there. When I cannot be there, it seems that she is. And apparently she has “offered†things…and it should bother me. Just as knowing that she is in his dreams should bother me. I don’t want to be that girl. I don’t want to be the one who is always jealous and full of angst. And so I let it go. Maybe writing this down will help.
I am worried about Corvus. Our meeting turned into a call for diplomacy. Why? It’s not as if we are fighting city-states. We are two organizations within Eorzea. We may need each others help in the future. So why do we seem to be at each other’s throats? I don’t know. I know that I am friends with all of them, and the constant bickering between my people only serves to aggravate me. I want it to be over and done with. And so, I am going to do this trip with the company no matter what. It should serve to bring us closer together. Maybe then I can teach them that we all need to work together. I understand their points, but at what point do we stop standing up for ourselves and start being whiny, instigating, children?
I’m worried about my future. What it might mean. I have my company. What if at some point I have to give it up? Have to give up the family that I have built for myself?
I’m worried about being alone. What if that happens? What if I lose everything? Then where will I be?
I don’t know. I don’t even know if writing this down will help. I’m just rambling now aren’t I? I suppose I will end this entry here.Â