The hardest part about RP romances is figuring out when they're a bad idea and not getting involved. Some people just aren't stable or skilled enough OOC to know how to RP a relationship without seriously causing trouble to the other party.
The last RP relationship I tried was the biggest pain in the rear I have ever had.
Both my character and theirs (a guildmate of mine) were deeply flawed, with self-esteem issues to boot, but strangely attracted to one another so it seemed. It was clear that it would never work long term because of their issues, though. OOCly, we discussed this, and we agreed to let it play out anyway for the drama and lulz, since good relationships are boring, and hey, what is RP without a little drama, right?
Unfortunately that was about as far as it ever went where good OOC communication was concerned. Their character devolved into a drama queen, demanding attention and sulking when mine wouldn't pay her enough mind. At first I found it amusing in a failzy anime relationship type of way... But as time went on, the behavior got more and more erratic, as when my character would respond and react to the her IC provocations, she would OOCly get angry and tell me that "there's no way you could tell that she liked him! you're god-modding!" It was like she artificially wanted to extend the does-he-or-doesn't-he aspect into eternity, to the point I was constantly altering my character so as not to cause more trouble with it.
The line got crossed when the IC relationship fail turned into guild-wide RP fail after a specific incident where her character did something that made mine have to choose between trusting her or following his personal code. He chose his code, as was his nature, and the fallout began as her friends started to mock and revile my character to the exclusion of any true plot-advancing methods; the uninvolved other guildmates often spent our RP nights sitting around with their mouths hanging open at the ridiculous turn everything had taken. Even when asked to stop, the offenders didn't - as it turns out, they were way more interested in interpersonal drama than telling a good story.
That was about the point I - and most of the rest of the guild - quit that game. As far as I know my character's former amour is still playing and is rather well-known for her melodrama at this point.
I learned a few things about that whole experience: one, to not let another person's drama ruin my own fun, and two, to stop an IC relationship cold the very minute something seems off to me OOCly. Then again, after all that, I never bothered trying a romantic angle since. I'd had several successful romances before that with just the right amount of drama, passion, and intrigue to make them work, so it's not as if I'm against them, but geez. All it takes is one burn to turn someone off of it for a long time.
It takes so much trust.
The last RP relationship I tried was the biggest pain in the rear I have ever had.
Both my character and theirs (a guildmate of mine) were deeply flawed, with self-esteem issues to boot, but strangely attracted to one another so it seemed. It was clear that it would never work long term because of their issues, though. OOCly, we discussed this, and we agreed to let it play out anyway for the drama and lulz, since good relationships are boring, and hey, what is RP without a little drama, right?
Unfortunately that was about as far as it ever went where good OOC communication was concerned. Their character devolved into a drama queen, demanding attention and sulking when mine wouldn't pay her enough mind. At first I found it amusing in a failzy anime relationship type of way... But as time went on, the behavior got more and more erratic, as when my character would respond and react to the her IC provocations, she would OOCly get angry and tell me that "there's no way you could tell that she liked him! you're god-modding!" It was like she artificially wanted to extend the does-he-or-doesn't-he aspect into eternity, to the point I was constantly altering my character so as not to cause more trouble with it.
The line got crossed when the IC relationship fail turned into guild-wide RP fail after a specific incident where her character did something that made mine have to choose between trusting her or following his personal code. He chose his code, as was his nature, and the fallout began as her friends started to mock and revile my character to the exclusion of any true plot-advancing methods; the uninvolved other guildmates often spent our RP nights sitting around with their mouths hanging open at the ridiculous turn everything had taken. Even when asked to stop, the offenders didn't - as it turns out, they were way more interested in interpersonal drama than telling a good story.
That was about the point I - and most of the rest of the guild - quit that game. As far as I know my character's former amour is still playing and is rather well-known for her melodrama at this point.
I learned a few things about that whole experience: one, to not let another person's drama ruin my own fun, and two, to stop an IC relationship cold the very minute something seems off to me OOCly. Then again, after all that, I never bothered trying a romantic angle since. I'd had several successful romances before that with just the right amount of drama, passion, and intrigue to make them work, so it's not as if I'm against them, but geez. All it takes is one burn to turn someone off of it for a long time.
It takes so much trust.
